[Copypasta] This offends me as a...

twitchquotes: This offends me as a vegan transgender hipster Native-American-Indo-Chinese hybrid alien agnostic-atheist German engineer who vapes fairtrade organic decaffeinated compressed and hydrated extra-protein soy breast milk on the regular and does Hindi Kama Sutra naked crossfit yoga 8 days a week.
twitch chat
June 2017
I used to be a real ad
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Lenny face centipede

β•šβ•( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°)═╝ β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ .β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ ..β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ β€¦β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ β€¦β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ ..β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ .β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ .β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ ..β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ β€¦β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ β€¦β•šβ•(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)═╝ …..β•š(β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ)╝ β€¦β€¦β•š(β–ˆβ–ˆ)╝ ………(β–ˆ) ……….*
ascii art
December 2020

Blizzard responds to blitzchung ban

twitchquotes: The πŸ’° specific πŸ’° views πŸ’° expressed πŸ’° by πŸ’° blitzchung πŸ’° were πŸ’° NOT πŸ’° a πŸ’° factor πŸ’° in πŸ’° the πŸ’° decisionπŸ’° weπŸ’° made.πŸ’° I πŸ’° want πŸ’° to πŸ’° be πŸ’° clear: πŸ’° our πŸ’° relationships πŸ’° in China πŸ’° had πŸ’° noπŸ’° influence πŸ’° on πŸ’° our πŸ’° decision.πŸ’°
twitch chat
October 2019

Hearthstone

I just screenshotted your NFT FAQ (Reddit)

I just screenshotted your NFT. You may be concerned about this. In case you are, please read the below: # FAQ: ## Why did you screenshot my NFT? I'm not going to tell you. ## Did you screenshot anybody else's NFTs? You could say I am screenshotting everybody's NFTs, but in the case I am telling you that I screenshotted your NFT. ## How are you screenshotting my NFTs? I screenshot when you post them on your profile. ## What are you planning to do with my NFTs? Have them all. ## What do I do about you screenshotting my NFTs? There's nothing you can do. ## When are you going to stop screenshotting my NFTs? You cannot escape me. ## Do I call the police? No. The authorities will not help you. ## What are the consequences of you screenshotting my NFTs? Be aware. ## What if I am ok with you screenshotting my NFTs? I will make sure you’re not. If there are any more questions then please consult your NFT wallet by directly speaking to it. ## Summary: I am screenshotting your NFTs.
November 2021

I downloaded Sonic games on my school computer

So yesterday in class we were all given our new Windows computers (last year, I hacked the chromebooks so they could play Sonic Advance) and I immediately downloaded twenty-five PC Sonic games within one hour and installed two dozen emulators to play the console and handheld ones. After we all got our computers, I bragged about having the ability to play 60 Sonic games. The teacher confisticated my computer and said I would have to use the chromebooks for the rest of the year. She also said that Sonic was a dead franchise and that Fortnite was better in every way. That was really no good and SLOW of her! So I ripped my computer out of my Sonic-hating teacher and screamed "YOU SLUTTY SLOW SONIC HATER! YOU'RE JUST TOO SLOW!" I also went to her macbook, and deleted Fortnite and installed more Sonic games and played Gotta Go Fast to the whole class. She gave me an F, which is impossible since E is the lowest rank and S is the highest, and sent me to the principal's office, where I was suspended and they called my parents, who took away my Game Gear. When I get back, I'll make sure they pay for being TOO SLOW.
July 2021

Salt Down Zone

twitchquotes: Attention: Thank you for coming to Kripp Aryan's show! The greatest show on Earth! Please, those of you in rows 1-8 must be aware you are in the "Salt Down Zone". If you do not want to be sprayed with salt, please see attendant. We have complimentary ponchos. Enjoy the show!.
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp
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