[Copypasta] spamming copypastas is the worst form of comedy

twitchquotes: Honestly, spamming copypastas is the worst form of comedy to exist on this planet. Instead of original jokes, we just have repetitive trash. As a stand up comedian, I spend hours on my craft making sure I make original jokes. I always leave the comedy club with the hottest bros. Maybe you copypasta people can learn something from me.
twitch chat
October 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

top players first name

twitchquotes: LETS GO MICHAEL!! (btw Michael is imaqtpie, i can use his first name because we are tight like that. yeah i know top players but its not a big deal to me lol)
twitch chat
November 2018
imaqtpie

Classic

Hello Kripp, Deathgarden developer here

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, Deathgarden developer here. I finally see that you got your vegan bitch ass to work. Remember, you're forced by contract to show off this game in all its splendor. And not only I'm paying you with a fuckton of money, but you also might get your wife back soon enough. So you better start getting some kills and play decently, or you will have to say goodbye to your midget dog. Happy gaming.
twitch chat
June 2019
Kripp

sellout

Fall Guys

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⢀⣠⣶⣶⣶⣶⣤⡀⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⣾⡿⢿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⡆⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⢿⣇⣸⣿⣿⣇⣸⡿⠃⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⢠⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣧⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿ ⣿⣿⣇⠄⣰⣶⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣶⣆⠄⢀⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⠄⢸⣿⠇⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣴⣾⣿⣶⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
August 2020

Story about the Romanian Kripparrian

twitchquotes: Here's the story about the Romanian Kripparrian. Born to a Momarrian and Paparrian. Lived in Canadarrian for some timerrian but is engaged to a womanarrian in Greecerrian. Rainarrian has absorbed Kripparrian and will one day make many babyarrians. Kripparrian and the familyarrian lived happy ever afterarrian. Please no copy pasterrian.
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

War Thunder is like playing chess

It's not that the game is addicting, it's just that there are no decent alternatives. War Thunder is basically the intellectual version of the FPS games that all the stupid children and mongoloid brains play. Instead of just being based purely on twitch "skills" which require as much intellectual ability as closing popup spam windows, in War Thunder you have to use at least some tactics and strategy. FPS games are like playing Pong on high speed. War Thunder is like playing chess. The art of gaming is simply dead for big brains. 20 years ago there were tons of games that required brainpower because PC gaming back then was by nerds and for nerds, but then the corporate suits took over and were like "broaden the appeal to we can make more sales" so everything got dumbed down to the lowest common denominator. My GF asked me if I was "having fun" playing War Thunder, and I looked at her like she was a fucking retard to even consider that sentence a valid question. I don't have FUN playing War Thunder. This game routinely pisses me off and makes me rage. However, when I stomp the entire enemy team and crush them so utterly I can hear the lamentations of their mothers, I feel satisfaction. I spent weeks grinding for Operation Winter. The vikings had a word for this. They called it Valhalla. Endless war. Endless combat. Knowing only victory and death. Bathing in the blood of your enemies. You get 15 kills and bask in glory and rewards, and think: what should I do now? Should I get in my Honda Fit and tour the local strip mall for my Triumph? Should I microwave some tendies and throw myself a great Feast? But there is only one option. There is only ever one option. To Battle! Various cultures have alternatively described the gameplay loop of War Thunder as their vision of Heaven or Hell. It is both.
January 2021
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing