[Copypasta] spamming copypastas is the worst form of comedy

twitchquotes: Honestly, spamming copypastas is the worst form of comedy to exist on this planet. Instead of original jokes, we just have repetitive trash. As a stand up comedian, I spend hours on my craft making sure I make original jokes. I always leave the comedy club with the hottest bros. Maybe you copypasta people can learn something from me.
twitch chat
October 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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The Coldest Place in the Universe May Actually Be a Sussy Baka

The Boomerang Nebula, located roughly 5,000 light-years away from our solar system, has a temperature of 1 Kelvin (-272 °C or -460 °F) making it the coldest natural place in the universe humanity has discovered. First found in 1995 by astronomers in Chile, we have since learned quite a bit about it. The Boomerang Nebula is a young planetary nebula which has reached such cold temperatures due to its unusually rapid expansion. However, recently, modern online enthusiasts have raised one question science has yet been unable to answer: is it sus? The profound similarities between the Boomerang Nebula and the characters from the hit game Among Us have led many to believe that the Boomerang Nebula is, in fact, awfully sus, but science has yet to confirm, deny, or even respond to these questions. Follow for more updates on this developing story.
June 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Classic

Kripp Fapparian

twitchquotes: After the execution of Cattarian, orchestrated by House Fapparian, Rania Cattarian of House Cattarian vowed to take revenge on her husband and the king of Twitcheros, Kripp Fapparian. Rania infiltrated Kripp's Landing to sprinkle PJSalt on Kripp's foodies during the royal streaming session. Kripp's last words were, "***, I'M NEVER LUCKY!"
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

GME bank consultation

Short story-time for amusement reasons only: some days ago, I went to my bank (Austria). I am the owner of quite a number of GME shares and my broker app is actually just the bank-intern bond trading app, where I need to pay transactional feed everytime I buy (what is sell?) GME shares. I informed myself about the reasoning of those transactional fees beforehand and found out that by paying them, I have the right of consultation by my bank about the shares they‘re trading/I‘m buying. So, I went to the main national building of my bank, they were really friendly at the beginning, enthustiatically, I mentioned GME to them and that I wish for professional consultation about the financial details involved with that stock (I am not a financial guy, actually, I don‘t exactly know what‘s going on, it‘s all pretty crazy to me). Suddenly, their posture and mimick changed pretty suddenly. I was told, they are not allowed to consult about GME. To my question, why this was the case, they told me, because GME is „too irrelevant for the big stock market“. They are „aware of the past short squeeze, but one should no longer focus on GME“. They acted as if GME was some „childish financial playground“ that should be forgotten about. When I confronted them with the huge recent naked short attacks and if they could explain to me possible effects of them if they were not covered, they just repeated themselves how „GME is not relevant, please focus on stocks like Apple or Amazon to be safe“. I left the bank, buying more GME shares.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

Trick2g, my son keeps saying lata and the gates

twitchquotes: Hello, is this "@Trick2g "? My son just got back from elementary school and keeps saying "lata" this and "the gates" that. He even told me how he wants to be a professional gate opener to all the asian hunnies. Please no Kapparino pastarino
twitch chat
September 2014
Trick2g

Nut

⣤⣤⡀⠀⣤⣤⡤⢠⣤⣤⡀⣠⣤⡄⣠⣤⣠⣤⣤⣤⠀⠀⠀ ⠘⣿⣧⡀⠀⣿⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⠀⡟⠁⢹⣯⠀⠻⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡇⠘⢿⣤⣿⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣠⣧⠀⠈⢻⣿⠀⠀⢿⣧⡀⣠⡿⠀⠀⠀⣸⣋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠙⠛⠋⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠈⠉⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠙⠛⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
January 2021
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