[Copypasta] I'm significantly more attractive and more interesting than you

twitchquotes: I'm significantly more attractive and more interesting than you, and so is my girlfriend. Your girlfriend is very ugly. And so are you. These are facts. Debate me.
twitch chat
July 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Alinity poem

twitchquotes: There is a cat in the vicinity. I summon Alinity. She yeets the cat into infinity. And then feeds the cat vodka martini. Takes some booty picture accidentally. Sells couple of her panty. Takes a twitch staff's virginity. Still no ban apparently.
twitch chat
November 2019

I’m sick and tired of people stating that Hunter takes no skill

twitchquotes: I’m sick and tired of people stating that Hunter takes no skill. What about when you have to play Unleash and go face, or how about when you have to equip the bow and go face. Then there’s those times where you have to drop Wolfrider or Arcane Golum and go face. Seriously people just hate because they don't appreciate how hard it is to smash your head on the keyboard and still manage to click the arrow on your opponents Face. No Copy Pastachino Cappachino Postachio Mochachino Hunterino Pepperino Jelly Queeno
twitch chat
February 2015
Forsen

Please help, when I sneeze, it sounds like I'm saying the n-word

I'm not sure what to do. For my early life, it wasn't a huge deal. I lived in a mostly white family who didn't really care, and I stayed home from school when I was sick. But now that I'm in college, I'm terrified of what it could mean. Doctors won't help me. Every time I've asked, they think I'm making it up and doing it on purpose, and now that I've moved, my doctor is this 6ft tall african-american man. I haven't been to a check-up in over a year. It's causing trouble with school too. The first instance was in chemistry. The professor told me to pass out some bunsen burners from the cabinet to the rest of the students. I got up and opened the cabinet, but it was super dusty inside, and before I could help myself, a huge sneeze forced itself out of my body. "N*GGA!" sounded across the classroom, and I just froze. My cheeks heated up as everyone just stared at me. I quickly said that I needed to go get a tissue and ran from the classroom. I was forced to have a meeting with my professor later, where she was adamant that she wouldn't have that kind of language in her classroom. I tried to explain that it was an accident and I didn't even have a reason to say the n-word while sneezing and gathering bunsen burners, but she was already mad so I think she zeroed in on my word choice and thought that I was inferring that other times I DID have a reason to say it. I didn't get kicked out but nobody wanted to partner with me for the rest of the semester, and I feel like the professor was a bit harsher on test questions. The most recent event happened only yesterday, and I'm terrified of what it could mean. I was in line at the Chick-fil-A in the cafeteria, feeling like shit. I'd been sick for a day or two, and normally I don't go out because of my unique problem, but I was starving and just needed to grab a quick bite. Right as I got up to the counter, I felt a sneeze coming on, and knew I was screwed. Here's the thing. When I'm sick, the issue is 10x worse. The phlegm or something in my throat makes the n-word sound come out with a lower, R-sound at the end instead of the gasp that normally makes the A. So I'm standing there, about to order my 8pc nugget, when I spasm and unleash a full forced "N****R!" across the entire cafeteria. Everybody heard it. Literally everybody. The girl at the counter, who unfortunately was black, just looked so hurt and angry at the same time, not to mention I think I may have sneezed a little on her. I turned and bolted from the cafeteria. I ran straight back to my dorm; I saw a group of guys trying to follow me, but they couldn't get in to my specific dorm building. I recognized a few of them from my chemistry class. I've been in my dorm ever since. I'm terrified of leaving. I'm positive that if they see me again, they'll kick the shit out of me. So that's my problem. I'm not sure how to prove my innocence and I don't think I'll survive another semester at this rate.
January 2021

Amogus 700 years in the future

Imagine, 700 years in the future, through some last vestige of the internet kept in an underground server, a notification miraculously appears on your device (which has been preserved in nuclear dust from the 5th world war). One night, an alien working a late shift at the museum of archeology notices the cracked screen suddenly light up, and upon it, one word arises from the battered code: Amogus. They do not know what this word means. They ponder it deeply. They scour the ancient tomes, desperate to understand its mystifying origin. It drives them mad. Is it a primeval cipher? The motto of a bygone civilization? A message from God? Night after night they study it by candlelight. They flip through pages in books so old, the slightest cough would turn the paper to a fine off-white powder. The answer is nowhere to be found. And then they are struck by a revelation: I was not meant to know this word. Its esoteric nature escapes my grasp for a reason. What if its meaning is too enlightening to bear? With this revelation comes anger. Spite. Despair. Why shouldn't I understand it?! What cosmic forces are there at play to keep me from such knowledge?! In a fit of desperate rage, they shatter your device against a wall and exclaim, arms raised to the heavens: "This is literally 1984!" Silence... Their pleas are unanswered. Sadly, in the end, their inability to unlock the word's meaning drives them to suicide. Its secrets are never known. So I ask you this: is it better to die having never understood the true mind-bending nature of Amogus, or to be driven mad by the little spaceman in his blood-red suit? If you knew enlightenment would render you incapable of living on this mortal earth without making daily references to a game of space mafia, would you accept it? With knowledge comes power, but also endless suffering. Choose wisely, and be wary when standing at the edge of that great abyss we call "the Truth," lest you fall too deep.
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

OGN's mods

twitchquotes: Hᴇʟʟᴏ OGN, ᴛʜɪs ɪs Hɪᴛʟᴇʀ ᴡʀɪᴛɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ғʀᴏᴍ ʙᴇʏᴏɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ɢʀᴀᴠᴇ. I ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴍᴏᴅs ᴅᴏ ᴀ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴊᴏʙ ᴏғ ᴄᴀʀʀʏɪɴɢ ᴏɴ ᴍʏ ʙᴇʟɪᴇғs.
twitch chat
March 2014
OGN Hearthstone
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