[Copypasta] Annoying Lit mobile YouTube ad

twitchquotes: So lit mobile just sent me this solar wireless battery pack, I'm excited, lets see whats inside. I really like the build its got really nice grips on the side, its shock proof, and water resistant. The power bank has 20,000 milliamps which can fully charge your phone up to eight times. Its also got a convenient loop for carrying. on the back of the device we have a bunch of solar panels which can charge the battery bank in about 60 minutes. On the top of the device, there are 3 usb ports and 2 of them are fast charging. If you hit the power button 2 times, the led light comes on. If you hit the power button once, the led lights will tell you how much battery you have. There's a micro usb port on the side for fast charging. My favorite part of this device is that it charges my phone wirelessly. there's a red light indicator at the top to let you know that your phone is charging.
twitch chat
May 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

"Your roadhog is insane." Seagull said

twitchquotes: "Your roadhog is insane." Seagull said, as he slipped his feminine hand into Moon's pants and smirked. "Are you trying to insert your payload?" protests Moon, as Seagull blushes, the boyish figure undressed before Moon. "Weak tank play, Moon." The two kissed, deeply and passionately, and afterwards Seagull charges like Reinhardt through Moon’s symmetra portal.
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August 2017
MOONMOON

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She sells seashells on a seashore, but the value of these shells will fall

She sells seashells on a seashore But the value of these shells will fall Due to the laws of supply and demand No one wants to buy shells 'cause there's loads on the sand Step 1: you must create a sense of scarcity Shells will sell much better if the people think they're rare, you see Bare with me, take as many shells as you can find and hide 'em on an island stockpile 'em high until they're rarer than a diamond Step 2: you gotta make the people think that they want 'em Really want 'em, really fuckin want 'em Hit 'em like Bronson Influencers, product placement, featured prime time entertainment If you haven't got a shell then you're just a fucking waste man Three: it's monopoly, invest inside some property, start a corporation, make a logo, do it properly ""Shells must sell"", that will be your new philosophy Swallow all your morals they're a poor man's quality Four: expand, expand, expand, clear forest, make land, fresh blood on hand Five: why just shells? Why limit your self? She sells seashells, sell oil as well! Six: guns, sell stocks, sell diamonds, sell rocks, sell water to a fish, sell the time to a clock Seven: press on the gas, take your foot off the brakes, Run to be the president of the United States Eight: big smile mate, big wave that's great Now the truth is overrated, tell lies out the gate Nine: Polarize the people, controversy is the game It don't matter if they hate you if they all say your name Ten: the world is yours, step out on a stage to a round of applause You're a liar, a cheat, a devil, a whore And you sell seashells on the seashore.
August 2021

i have not been gifted a single sub

twitchquotes: Hey streamer, i just wanted to express my disappointment in your community with this message. I have been a active viewer for the past couple of years and despite my constant effort i have not been gifted a single sub by your community. You should really be ashamed.
twitch chat
February 2020

My friend Kappa needs your help

twitchquotes: Hello, my name is Keepo and I want to ask you something. My friend Kappa needs your help. He wants to find some more Kappa friends. So please, spam Kappa as much as possible in the chat, so that my friend Kappa could find more of his Kappa friends. It makes a big difference, thank you!
twitch chat
August 2014
Pokimane

Me and you know the real struggle

twitchquotes: Reynaldo, I have consistently around ten viewers, and its so annoying whenever I stream because I constantly get sniped, these plebs wouldn't understand, me and you know the real struggle. I have an 100% win rate when im not streaming and only a 5% when I am, just like you.
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing