[Copypasta] Day 2 without sports

twitchquotes: Day 2 without sports: Found a young lady sitting on my couch yesterday. Apparently sheโ€™s my wife. She seems nice. Apparently we also have 2 kids.
twitch chat
March 2020

Coronavirus

COVID

NBA, MLB, and NHL seasons suspended due to coronavirus
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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The pandemic in 2028 is kinda sus

Year is 2028 The pandemic has gotten so bad we are all forced to wear colored isolation suits with their own oxygen tank and no hands for contact. Those infected are turned into sociopathic murders that try to secretly kill everyone, but still dress and act like the rest of us. I work as a spaceship engineer in the Skled along with 9 other people. We just got notified that one among us was infected, but we still have to keep maintaining the ship otherwise it will explode. We are trying to figure out who it is by voting. 2 of us are already dead and i saw red vent, but nobody believes me. I think the others want to vote me off. This might be the last thing i'll write. Goodbye. Tell me wife i love her.
January 2022

Among Us / Amogus

Coronavirus

COVID

Hold Ctrl and type Wash Your Hands

twitchquotes: โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€” imGlitch Twitch gives 100 bits for coronavirus awareness Hold Ctrl and type Wash Your Hands โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”
twitch chat
March 2020

Coronavirus

COVID

ACHOO uh oh you just got the Delta variant!

ACHOOโ€ผ๏ธ๐Ÿคง๐ŸคงWhat was thatโ‰๏ธโ‰๏ธ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜Uh-oh ๐Ÿ˜ฏ looks like you just got ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€ the Delta variant! ๐Ÿ™€๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ Donโ€™t you know ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธโ‰๏ธ๐Ÿคข๐Ÿค•๐Ÿค’๐Ÿคค the world ๐ŸŒ HOE Organization ๐Ÿ™ˆ๐Ÿ‘… called it the most DOMINANT ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผ strain since the start of the ๐Ÿ—“ PANTIE-DEMIC ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘ˆ No more touching daddy ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ ๐Ÿง“๐Ÿผ until you wash ๐Ÿงฝ๐Ÿงฝyour dirty ๐Ÿพnasty ๐Ÿคข little ๐Ÿคž๐Ÿผfingers โœ‹๐Ÿป๐Ÿคš๐Ÿปโœ‹๐Ÿป๐Ÿคš๐Ÿปfor 6๏ธโƒฃ9๏ธโƒฃ seconds with sHOEp ๐Ÿงผ and water ๐Ÿ’ง ๐Ÿ‘… otherwise it doesnโ€™t count ๐Ÿคก๐Ÿคก๐Ÿคก Time to stop ๐Ÿ›‘ spreading the germs ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿฅด๐Ÿค’and start spreading ๐Ÿ˜งyour legs๐Ÿคค๐Ÿฆถ๐Ÿฝ๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿปbecause everyone ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿฆฐ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿซ๐Ÿฆน๐Ÿพโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿงœ๐Ÿผโ€โ™‚๏ธhas to keep TWERKING ๐Ÿ˜ˆ๐Ÿ˜ˆfrom home! ๐Ÿก SEND THIS TO 1๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ other coronavirus cucks ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿพ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿปotherwise Fuckboy Fauci ๐Ÿ™€๐Ÿ™€ is cumming for you ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ†
August 2021

Emoji Pasta

Coronavirus

COVID

Day 2 without sports

twitchquotes: Day 2 without sports: Found a young lady sitting on my couch yesterday. Apparently sheโ€™s my wife. She seems nice. Apparently we also have 2 kids.
twitch chat
March 2020

Coronavirus

COVID

โš ๏ธWARNINGโš ๏ธ cock inspection is NOT required at the vaccination sites!!!! don't be tricked like me!!

So I was waiting in line to receive my vaccine when all of a sudden this medical "official" came up to me and said that there was something wrong with my patient registration and asked me to follow him to the back. When we went around back he said that I had to take off my pants and show my cock because penis size is the most accurate way to confirm patient identity. Because I thought he was a medical official I swiftly removed my pants and underwear to show him my member. After he fondled it for a bit he said it was good and I could go back into the line. It was only after I received the vaccine I realized that he forgot to check my balls too!!! He was obviously not certified to check such an area and I immediately contacted the security guards about his presence. Please do not fall for any tricks like I did! stay safe and happy vaccinating!
August 2021

Coronavirus

COVID

Vaccines

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