[Copypasta] It's fucking astonishing Resident Evil was a successful franchise

twitchquotes: It's fucking astonishing Resident Evil was a successful franchise. Most of the series is mediocre or terrible. Out of the entire series 1/2/3/4/REmake/RER2 are classics. 5/7/Revelations 2 are really good. Revelations and the Outbreaks are cool. The rest are middling to trash. That includes all 3 Gun Survivor Games, Operation Raccoon City and Umbrella Corps, RE6, Resident Evil Gaiden, Code Veronica, Zero, and both Chronicles games. Plus all the phone garbage and the terrible films. Something having Resident Evil on it is like a 50/50 shot for quality.
twitch chat
February 2020
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Infinite poop

twitchquotes: Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can't free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you've broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.
twitch chat
June 2019

Classic

Angry Kirby

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠙⠟⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠈⢷⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠗⠀⠙⣿⣷⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⡤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⣿⡿⠉⠉⠁⠀⠸⠿⠿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢻⣿⣿ ⠟⠋⠉⠉⠙⠛⠿⢿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⢸⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣷⣦⣐⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢾⣿⣶⣶⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢸⣿⣿ ⣰⣀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿ ⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠔⠈⠁⠀⣀⣽⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻ ⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠈⠁⣠⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘ ⣆⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠔⢁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣦⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢎⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣷⣅⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⢀⡀⢀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣄⢉⠛⠛⢉⢁⣴⣿⣿⣷⣤⡀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣀⣤⣄⡀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠁⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⣀⠉⠛⠛⠻⠿⠛⠛⠋⢁⣀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
February 2021

I declare with utter certainty that James is an ass

twitchquotes: ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ɢʜᴀsᴛʟʏ ᴇʏʀɪᴇ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ sᴇᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴅs ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ, ᴀɴᴅ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜɪs ᴠᴀɴᴛᴀɢᴇ ᴘᴏɪɴᴛ I ᴅᴇᴄʟᴀʀᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴜᴛᴛᴇʀ ᴄᴇʀᴛᴀɪɴᴛʏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴊᴀᴍᴇs ɪs ᴀɴ ᴀss
twitch chat
February 2016
Dota Major

Dota 2

National Association for the Advancement of Urgot Players

twitchquotes: Dear Mr. Pie, I am from the NAAUP (National Association for the Advancement of Urgot Players) and myself and my organization has taken a notice to you never playing Urgot. We feel this is highly discriminatory and would ask that you rectify this by playing Urgot immediately. Thank you. Kappa
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Trumpet Skeleton of the Abyss

twitchquotes: 🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺💀💀💀💀💀 IF YOU SEE THIS MESSAGE WHILE SCROLLING you have been visited by trumpet skeleton of the abyss. good bones and calcium will come to you but only if you reply "thank mr skeltal" to this message and pasta it to 3 times!! 💀💀🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
twitch chat
August 2015

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing