[Copypasta] Sleeping in bed with your parents

twitchquotes: Question for those in chat: Let's say you are sleeping in bed with your parents. You are in the middle. You wake up and want to get up, but you notice that you are partially inserted into your mom and your dad is partially inserted into you and they are still asleep. Which way do you thrust to get out?
twitch chat
November 2019
I used to be a real ad
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Kripp's gotta hit up the bathroom

twitchquotes: "Give me a second, guys," Kripp says. "Gotta hit up the bathroom" He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately gives Dex a swift kick down the stairs. As Dex yelps loudly in pain, Kripp overturns the nearest chair, yelling "Fuck this game!" as loudly as he can. Rania tries to calm him down, but Kripp swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Kripp wipes the blood off of his face, sits back down at his computer, and resumes his stream.
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January 2018
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Red powder found on Summoner's Rift

twitchquotes: Imaqtpie's games were delayed today after a red powder was found on the rift. After analysis, Rioters determined the red substance, unknown to Imaqtpie, was the remnants of an enemy nexus. Games resumed after Rioters decided Imaqtpie was unlikely to encounter the substance again.
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March 2014
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CSGO rage

The only reason, the only reason youโ€™re all laughing is because you donโ€™t understand that I also played in a team before and itโ€™s actually proper CS and not the kind of shit you play. Iโ€™m not gonna play matchmaking with you all because youโ€™re all fucking useless anyway. You know why youโ€™re better than me? Do you know why? Shut the fuck up you cunts. Tell me the answer, come on you fucking retards, laugh all you want you fucking dumbasses, honestly, fuck this. Youโ€™re all having a laugh and Iโ€™m trying to play a game and actually do something and fucking win. Fuck my dick.
April 2022

CSGO

Text-to-Speech Playing