[Copypasta] Sleeping in bed with your parents

twitchquotes: Question for those in chat: Let's say you are sleeping in bed with your parents. You are in the middle. You wake up and want to get up, but you notice that you are partially inserted into your mom and your dad is partially inserted into you and they are still asleep. Which way do you thrust to get out?
twitch chat
November 2019
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

QT locks in Ezreal

twitchquotes: Somedays I sit at my computer desk, wondering if this is it. Is this my life? Is this what I want? I then look to QT's stream. He locks in Ezreal. I smile. This is what I want for my life.
twitch chat
January 2019
imaqtpie

League of Legends

I screamed "dead body reported" at my aunts funeral

Me (M 9) screamed "dead body reported" at my aunts funeral. My mom said that my aunt died and that we are going to her funeral the next morning. As soon as she left the room crying I busted put laughing because it reminded me of among us a popular video game. So as we were riding in the car I was thinking about saying "dead body reported" at the funeral. When we finnaly arived I screamed "dead body reported" everyone was looking me like if some sort of a weirdo. Then I remembered that my grandfather's sister fell in the vents and died when she was 2 years old. So I said grandpa's sister sus she vented. My grandfather started crying and everyone was screaming at me instead of laughing. My mom took my x box and said that I am going to therapist tomorow. Idk my mom is acting kinda sus πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
February 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Salt season pass

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Don salteroni from Sodium enterprises, we would like to remind you to renew your season pass as soon as possible if you would like to continue receiving daily shipments of table salt, best regards Don salteroni. pls no PJSalt
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

I miss the old Voyboy

twitchquotes: I miss the old Voyboy, SoloQ troll Voyboy. Not playing tanks Voyboy, teamfight flanks Voyboy. I hate the new Voyboy, the never rude Voyboy, family friendly streams Voyboy, the too polite Voyboy, meta slave Voyboy, this is the worst Voyboy. I miss the Curse Voyboy, Akali Nurse Voyboy, 420 burst Voyboy. I gotta say, at that time I'd like to feed Voyboy.
twitch chat
September 2016
Voyboy

League of Legends

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing