[Copypasta] Sleeping in bed with your parents

twitchquotes: Question for those in chat: Let's say you are sleeping in bed with your parents. You are in the middle. You wake up and want to get up, but you notice that you are partially inserted into your mom and your dad is partially inserted into you and they are still asleep. Which way do you thrust to get out?
twitch chat
November 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
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So Aurateur, let’s have a talk.

twitchquotes: So Aurateur, let’s have a talk. I strongly feel that your channel would do better if you turned off TTS or at least filtered out the spam. Thing is, while I myself have never donated to you or any other streamer, and my only subs are twitch prime, I feel I know a thing or two about how to succeed as a streamer and I’m certain your channel would do better without all the spam, it’s clear nobody wants that shit and is the only thing holding you back as a fulltime streamer. Thank you.
twitch chat
July 2020
Aurateur

The Emoji Movie summary

The Emoji Movie unlocks the never-before-seen secret world inside your smartphone. Hidden within the messaging app is Textopolis, a bustling city where all your favorite emojis live, hoping to be selected by the phone's user. In this world, each emoji has only one facial expression - except for Gene, an exuberant emoji who was born without a filter and is bursting with multiple expressions. Determined to become "normal" like the other emojis, Gene enlists the help of his handy best friend Hi-5 and the notorious code breaker emoji Jailbreak. Together, they embark on an epic "app-venture" through the apps on the phone, each its own wild and fun world, to find the Code that will fix Gene. But when a greater danger threatens the phone, the fate of all emojis depends on these three unlikely friends who must save their world before it's deleted forever.
August 2021

Okuyasu Pose

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡔⠲⠶⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣘⡗⠔⡐⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣨⣿⣠⠐⠞⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡠⠔⢺⣿⢛⣿⣿⢄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣤⡶⠡⣲⢀⡴⢟⡻⡛⠓⠴⡾⣷⣱⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠘⣟⣏⢤⣽⣷⣦⣴⡴⠤⠄⣰⣶⣟⣏⣈⠐⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢹⣿⣤⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣿⣿⡿⠙⠿⣷⣶⣤⠥⠦⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠘⣿⣷⣤⢚⣿⡿⠿⠿⠛⢛⡨⣥⣤⡈⠙⢻⠶⠧⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣤⣾⣿⢿⣯⠹⣻⡝⣰⣷⣶⡿⠃⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⡿⢿⣿⣻⣞⣿⠿⠷⢀⡔⢫⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣯⢿⣦⣄⣘⣒⣛⠶⠊⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⡿⢻⣿⢟⣷⣭⣽⣿⣷⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⢿⣿⣿⠯⠺⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢩⣿⣿⣿⣴⣮⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢣⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣼⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣋⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠺⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣽⠤⡬⠋⠙⢿⣦⣀⡀⢄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡘⣛⣭⣿⠂⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⡔⠄⢀⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠧⠖⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
March 2020

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

I hate British people

Lame ass British motherfucking broken teeth tea drinking small country weird accent monocle top hat wearer bitchass motherfuckers with their poor hygiene and dental care and a shitty bitchass old ass motherfucking queen that was alive during the fucking Boston tea party just to say “OH WHAT BLOODY WANKERS” towards the Americans who made the smart ass decision to throw their dumbass motherfucking tea into the fucking BOSTON HARBOR then say “see you” and get the fuck out and start a new nation and shit cause they couldn’t tolerate people who put the letter “u” into the word color and call cookies fucking BISCUTS, the British cant even see straight with their crossed-ass eyes and their messed up teeth and EVERYTIME they take a bite atleast 8 of their teeth on their crooked-ass jaws are shoved into their tongues and the top of their worthless ass bitchass motherfucking mouths and then, with a mouth full of blood, they’ll say “OH HOW FUCKING SCRUMPTIOUS” like shut the fuck up bitch no one wants to hear your accent that sounds worse than motherfucking nails on a chalkboard. Just. SHUT. THE FUCK. UP. Lameass wankers.
February 2021

British People

It's already priced in

twitchquotes: Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
twitch chat
April 2020
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