[Copypasta] Sleeping in bed with your parents

twitchquotes: Question for those in chat: Let's say you are sleeping in bed with your parents. You are in the middle. You wake up and want to get up, but you notice that you are partially inserted into your mom and your dad is partially inserted into you and they are still asleep. Which way do you thrust to get out?
twitch chat
November 2019
I used to be a real ad
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BALDING not MALDING

twitchquotes: Look at all of these non-intellectuals in chat. They struggle so hard to spell simple words such as "bald". They always type "mald" in chat instead. The pure stupidity in chat makes me lose hair in a way in which my hairline recedes aka "BALDING" not "MALDING".
twitch chat
July 2019

Furry

⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠉⠻⣷⣦⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⡶⠟⠋⢻⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢰⠇⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣧⣤⣄⣀⣤⣤⣾⡟⠉⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠘⡄⠀⢀⣠⣴⠟⠋⠉⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⠿⣷⣀⠀⠀⣸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢐⣦⡾⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⣾⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⢾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⢀⣀⣰⣾⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡇⡀⠀⠀⣀⣿⣻⡗⠀⠰⣛⣍⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⡇⠀⢰⢧⡻⢎⠿⠆⠼⣏⠻⣣⠀⠀⠈⢻⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⢡⠀⢠⣶⠖⠃⠐⠂⠀⠈⠉⢉⠀⢀⡄⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⡠⠒⠛⠻⣮⠈⣿⣦⡀⠰⡷⡇⠀⢀⣽⣂⣿⣇⣿⣇⠀⣀⡤⠤⢀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣞⠀⠀⠀⡀⣼⣿⣿⣿⠛⡳⠦⠖⠀⡘⣿⣿⠃⢻⣿⣿⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⢂ ⠀⢸⡟⢀⠀⢸⡇⣿⢿⣿⠟⠑⠑⢄⠀⠀⡾⠟⡏⠀⢸⠀⠃⠀⣰⡖⠀⠀⢀⢸ ⣰⠀⠃⢸⠆⢼⣷⠙⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠓⠎⠆⠀⠈⢲⣤⡄⠀⢰⡿⢃⣴⣶⣼⡏ ⣿⠀⠀⠈⠀⠈⠀⠀⡾⣅⣀⡀⢀⠀⠀⢸⡄⣠⡾⠛⠉⣿⣦⡿⠇⠀⠉⠉⠁⠀ ⣿⣄⠀⠀⢀⡷⠀⠸⡇⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠙⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢿⣿⣿⣦⣼⡅⠀⠀⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣶⣶⣤⣀⣤⣾⠇⠀
ascii art
July 2020

Art of Conquest is such an amazing FREE game!

twitchquotes: Art of Conquest is such an amazing FREE game! (Thanks for joining our Conquest Loyalty Rewards Program! Your selected channel is: nl_kripp. The more you post this message in his chat, the bigger your rewards! 1 Post = 10k Gold/Mana/Wood. 5 Posts = 50k Basic Resources + 3x 8 Hour Rush. 40 Posts = 750k Basic Resources + 20k Rare Resources + 21x 8 Hour Rush. Please remove this part before posting or your program will be terminated!)
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

sellout

Qtpie plays Apex Legends

twitchquotes: qtpDANCE on me qtpDANCE hes one hit qtpDANCE hes lit qtpDANCE hes no armor qtpDANCE im fucking running qtpDANCE im dead as fuck qtpDANCE im far as fuck from you guys qtpDANCE im gigalooted qtpDANCE give me a real gun game qtpDANCE oh my god qtpDANCE im so fucking bad qtpDANCE oh shit qtpDANCE im fucking trolling qtpDANCE if anyone has a skullpiercer qtpDANCE
twitch chat
May 2019
imaqtpie

Ameng meets Bumper in a hallway

twitchquotes: Bumper broke into a cold sweat. There he was across the hallway, a man whose name that brought chills down his spine. Bumper looked down, hoping to avoid direct eye contact. "A-ameng," Bumper stuttered. "What up, virgin" Ameng boomed. Bumper braced himself but it was too late. Ameng's 5000 tonne shoulder slammed into his, the movement causing air waves across the room. Bumper flew back and the concrete wall chipped around him. His shoulder was definitely broken. "Later, nerd." Ameng chuckled.
twitch chat
March 2019
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

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