[Copypasta] Quit gaming 8 months ago. Bought a new car

twitchquotes: Quit gaming 8 months ago. Bought a new car, I have an amazing new girlfriend, I make a shitload of money and I'm buying a house this spring. I party every weekend, I'm never home. I'm enjoying life. Do yourselves a favor. Stop trying to make gaming a career. It's cringe as fuck
twitch chat
September 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Warrior vs warrior

twitchquotes: HEH, GREETINGS ResidentSleeper ARMOR UP ResidentSleeper ARMOR UP ResidentSleeper I can take the hit ResidentSleeper Welcome to the grand tournament ResidentSleeper TANK UP ResidentSleeper TANK UP ResidentSleeper I'M OUT OF CARDS
twitch chat
March 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

Krepo and a 14 year old

twitchquotes: "So my girlfriend the other day asked if she could roleplay as a 14 year old while we were having sex. I was like what the fuck? That shit's gross. You're gonna be 14 in like two years anyways." - Krepo 2016
twitch chat
May 2016
Sneaky

League of Legends

Response to "go fuck yourself"

What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
April 2020

Classic

FeelsFurryMan

⠄⠄⢀⣤⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⣶⣿⢱⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢠⠈⣿⣿⣿⣷⡦⢀⣤⣤⣤⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⡀⠴⠶⠿⢿⣿⣿⢸⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠸⣧⠹⢿⣿⡿⢡⣾⣿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣶⣄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣝⢿⢸⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣿⣧⡌⠿⢡⣿⣩⣴⣾⣿⣿⣶⣬⣝⡃⠟⣫⣭⣭⣭⣭⣥⡘⢿⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⡟⢫⣭⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⢻⡟⢫⣶⠒⠒⠒⣶⣤⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣙⣥⣴⣿⣿⡟⠥⠞⣫⣭⠁⠂⠄⢲⣶⣬⡈⢙⣩⠄⠂⠄⢰⣦⣭⣁⠄⠄ ⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣍⣛⣀⠄⠄⣚⣋⡉⣰⣞⣛⣂⣀⣀⣘⣋⠉⠉⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡿⣋⣥⣾⣿⣿⠿⠟⠟⠻⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠏⣁⣀⠆⠿⢉⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡀⠄⠰⢶⣰⠿⠿⢿⣉ ⠿⠟⢛⣩⣭⣥⣶⠶⢚⣩⣄⠄⠺⠿⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⠷⠄⠐⣉⡓⠲⠤ ⣶⣿⡿⠟⠛⣉⣴⡾⠄⣉⠤⠤⢭⣍⣛⣛⣓⡒⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⢚⣛⡛⠉⠙⢦⣄ ⠋⣥⣶⡾⠿⢋⣡⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⡭⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠉ ⡿⠄⠃⢤⣄⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣶⣿⣿⣶⣶⣬⣭⣭⣭⣙⣓⣒⣒⣒⣒⣒⣒⣰⣶⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
November 2021

Pepe

Yuletide tunes in your playlist

twitchquotes: (╭ರ_•́)\c[] Dear Mr. Andrey Yanyuk, may I humbly suggest the implementation of Yuletide tunes in your playlist for the day good sir? (╭ರ_•́)\c[]
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing