[Copypasta] Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
July 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Privyet, Komrade Toast!

twitchquotes: Privyet, Komrade Toast! Is your cousin Dmitri from Mother Russia! I am of hearing that you make much moneys by playing simplistic chess game for toddlers and whining like little baby in front of thousands of simpletons! BLYAT! You should play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go! Already I am recruit by man with enormous forehead for professional team Tampon Storm and will be winning many tournaments, yes! Don't be a cyka, you capitalist pig, and stop crying like baby! Love, Dmitri.
twitch chat
July 2019
DisguisedToast

Teamfight Tactics

Garfield

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠞⠉⢉⣭⣿⣿⠿⣳⣤⠴⠖⠛⣛⣿⣿⡷⠖⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠁⢀⣶⢻⡟⠿⠋⣴⠿⢻⣧⡴⠟⠋⠿⠛⠠⠾⢛⣵⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⣿⡿⢶⣄⠀⢀⡇⢀⡿⠁⠈⠀⠀⣀⣉⣀⠘⣿⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠛⡹⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣭⣤⡈⢑⣼⣻⣿⣧⡌⠁⠀⢀⣴⠟⠋⠉⠉⠛⣿⣴⠟⠋⠙⠻⣦⡰⣞⠁⢀⣤⣦⣤⠀ ⠀⠀⣰⢫⣾⠋⣽⠟⠑⠛⢠⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⡈⠻⣍⠤⢤⣌⣀ ⢀⡞⣡⡌⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣇⠀⢾⣷⢤⣬⣉ ⡞⣼⣿⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠸⣿⣇⠈⠻ ⢰⣿⡿⢹⠃⠀⣠⠤⠶⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⣿⠛⡄⠀ ⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⡟⡀⠀⠈⡗⠲⠶⠦⢤⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣸⣧⣤⣤⠤⠤⣿⣀⡀⠉⣼⡇⠀ ⣿⣴⣴⡆⠀⠀⠻⣄⠀⠀⠡⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⡈⠀⠻⠟⠀⢀⠋⠉⠙⢷⡿⡇⠀ ⣻⡿⠏⠁⠀⠀⢠⡟⠀⠀⠀⠣⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠈⠀⢀⣀⡾⣴⠃⠀ ⢿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⠄⣀⠠⠼⣁⠀⡱⠤⠤⠐⠁⠀⠀⣸⠋⢻⡟⠀⠀ ⠈⢧⣀⣤⣶⡄⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⠖⠛⠻⣄⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⡾⠋⢀⡞⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⡇⠀⠈⠓⢦⣤⣤⣤⡤⠞⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠒⠚⢩⡅⣠⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⢧⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⣻⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠶⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⡴⠖⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
September 2019

I am financially ruined

I came here for the first time and in 3 minutes made the decision to put way more than I can afford into PLTR calls. I’m too retarded and now I literally dont know what to do I am financially ruined and I can’t even remember what I read that said this pltr thing was a good move. Fml
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Intellectual simp for Pokimane

twitchquotes: Hello, Miss Poki! I was scrolling through your page per usual and I happened to notice you take a plentiful amount of photos with your feet inframe and show them off quite a lot during streams. Is this on purpose? If so, please don't be embarrassed by my intellect! I think it is rather cute. I have subscribed to you for another month and was wondering if I could have secret access to some photos of your adorable soles? If not, I understand. You are a very busy woman and I am no more than a guy on the internet with a ravishingly high IQ might I add. Thank you for reading my message and have a wonderful day!
twitch chat
October 2021
Pokimane

Simps

moon2LULT wasn't dropped due to lack of popularity

twitchquotes: Don't get it twisted chat. moon2LULT wasn't dropped due to lack of popularity or for a better emote or anything. It was a selfish desire to personally absolve the broadcaster of his poor use of ultimate abilities. He wants to forget, but this we cannot allow. Every McCree Q to respawn, we moon2LULT. Every Winston ult jumping off the edge, we moon2LULT. Every time he presses Q at 20 HP and dies instantly, we moon2LULT. You must be vigilant, vertical scrolling communication room. moon2LULT
twitch chat
June 2017
MOONMOON
Text-to-Speech Playing