[Copypasta] Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
July 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Half watermelon wants to be full watermelon

twitchquotes: Hey guys i am half watermelon but to be a full watermelon i need people to roll like water melon. I hope you will help me become a full fledged watermelon. Me as a full fledged watermelon will not disappoint you and I will become the best watermelon ever. Thank you.
twitch chat
July 2014
Riot Games

Stalin

⡿⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠞⠛⠁⠄⡼⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠙⣦⠐⠠⡥⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⠄⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⡔⠛⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⢰⢏⣤⣦⣤⣍⣉⣿⣿⣿⡟⢋⣁⣤⣤⣤⣈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠚⣯⡄⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⣾⣿⣉⣀⣠⠅⠄⣽⣿⣿⣇⠈⢈⣉⣩⣐⡙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠤⢿⢱⣿⣿ ⣿⠁⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠾⣿⣿ ⡏⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡇⣿⣿ ⣧⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣯⣽⣋⠽⢭⣽⣤⡘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠩⣭⣽⠁⢣⢿⣯⡉⣿⡶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠁⠄⠈⠋⠈⠄⡈⠁⠒⠌⠊⣃⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣷⣤⣄⣤⣠⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⠛⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣷⣿⣭⣤⣬⡁⢉⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2018

Summoning Kripp

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ OJ poured and candle lit, with this chant i summon Kripp ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Oh I'm sorry snowflake, did I OFFEND you?

Oh I'm sorry snowflake, did I OFFEND you? Do you want a bandaid? Do you want a hug? Do you want a kiss? I will kiss you. I will do it. Right on the mouth. Come here snowflake.. that's it.. your lips are so soft, snowflake.. mnnhm... ah...... snowflake..........
January 2022

Politics

Chat analyses Kripp's painting

twitchquotes: I honestly can't believe the idiocy of this chat sometimes. The green obviously represents Kripp's veganism, which is contrasted by the red below it, symbolizing animals and meat. The orange in the middle is a masterful representation of Kripp's balding spot, and the black strokes surrounding it are his attempts to hide it.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing