[Copypasta] Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
July 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
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I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of seizing the means of production from the dirty bourgeoisie. People say to me that a person being a historical communist revolution is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon instal hammers, sickles, and other assorted proletariat farming tools on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Comrade" and respect my right to seize the means of production and free the working class. If you can't accept me you're an oppressor and need to check your capitalist privileges. Thank you for being so understanding.
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June 2017

I sexually Identify as

Starege

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠻⠛⠉⠉⠛⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⣠⡶⢶⣶⣄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣶⣶⣄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⣿⡇⢀⢻⣿⣷⡀⢰⣿⣿⠁⠈⣿⡇⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠟⢁⣀⣀⣀⡀⢿⡇⠘⣸⣿⣿⠁⢿⣿⣿⡘⠄⣿⠇⣀⣀⣀⣀⡉⠻⣿ ⡿⢃⣵⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⠈⠻⠿⣿⠿⢋⣄⡜⠿⣿⣿⡾⠋⢠⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡈ ⢁⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣧⡈⠓⠄⠄⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠚⢁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣾⡿⢁⢶⣦⡈⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⡿⢋⣭⡍⠙⣿⣿ ⣿⠃⣾⣄⠻⣿⣦⣈⡛⠻⠿⢿⠿⢿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠛⣁⣴⣿⠏⣡⠄⢿⣿ ⠙⠂⠙⣿⣷⣄⡙⠛⠻⠿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⡶⠿⠿⠛⢋⣠⣾⡟⠄⠚⠛ ⣶⣤⡀⠄⠙⠻⠿⢷⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⢤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣾⠿⠟⠋⠄⠄⢀⣠ ⠟⣛⣩⣴⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠈⠈⠉⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣐⣛⣻ ⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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Pepe

Why did I marry this angry bald internet man?

twitchquotes: It’s 11 p.m. and i've finally gotten comfortable in bed. It's been a long day and finally being able to get some rest is such a luxury. But my peace is soon broken as my husband shouts from the other room "OH COME ON! That was such BULLSHIT! Fucking highrolled AGAIN." Why did i do this to myself. Why did I marry this angry bald internet man? I haven't slept properly in months for his constant yelling throughout the night. God help me.
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Kripp

My son can be homer sexual

twitchquotes: My son 👦🏻 can be homer sexual 🏳️‍🌈 My daughter 👧🏻 can be lebanese 👭 But I will NEVER ‼️ Raise a child 👶🏻 who likes Jake and Logan Paul 🙅🏻‍
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Donald Trump said to Trump

twitchquotes: Donald Trump said to Trump while playing Trumps, “did u Trump…Trump?” He replied “No Trump I didn’t Trump while playing Trumps…Trump”, Trump then said “sounded like a Trumpet Trump, or did u do a Trump Trump that sounded like a Trumpet playing Trumps…Trump”, He replied “Hey is that Brian Kibbler, Kibbler Brian of Brian Kibbler Gaming…Kibbler Kibbler Brian Kibbler…?” Kappa
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