[Copypasta] Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
July 2019
I used to be a real ad
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twitchquotes: Hey, kripp! What's up, man? It's Jeff from History class from last semester. I didn't know you were some kind of famous celebrity hahahaha. Hit me up, man. Btw, did you ever hook up with Brian? He was a T H I C C boy. xD You are such a dog. It's cool to see you again. Hit me up sometime!
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β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–Œβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–β–Œβ–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“ β–“β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–€β–€β–Œβ–’β–’ β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’ β–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–β–’β–’ β–’β–β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–β–’β–’β–’ ▒▒▐▒▒░░░░▀▀▀▀░░░░▒▒▒▐▒▒▓ ▒▒▒▐▒▒░░░░░░░░░░░░▒▐▒▒▓▓ ▒▒▒▒▐▒▒░░░░░░░▐▄░▒▐▒▓▓▓▓ β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ ▓▓▒▒▒▐▒▒░▓▓▓▒▒▒▐▀▓▓▓▓▓▓▓
November 2014

I dream of becoming a carrot

twitchquotes: I dream of becoming a carrot. When I'm home alone I dig holes in the backyard and stand in them, put lettuce on top of my head from sun up to sun down. I would steal sun tan spray from stores and use it until I turned a bright orange. People tell me it's impossible for me to be a carrot but I know I can be anything I want to be.
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May 2016

Classic

Kapp

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How come we can't ever invade a cool country (Generation Kill)

Look at this shit, how come we can't ever invade a cool country, like chicks in bikinis, you know, how come countries like that don't ever need Marines, I'll tell you why, it's lack of pussy that fucks countries up, lack of pussy is the root fucking cause of all global instability, if more hajis were getting quality pussy, there'd be no reason for us to come over and fuck em up like this, cause a nutbusting haji, is a happy haji.
March 2021
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