[Copypasta] Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
July 2019
I used to be a real ad
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Mods smell bad xD

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September 2020

MODS

There is a bunch of Twitch overlords

twitchquotes: There is a bunch of Twitch overlords who grow batches of streamers from genetically modified eggs. When these eggs hatch and grow, they are given their first computer and start streaming a Dora the Explorer game. As they grow up, the most popular streamers advance and are given more complex games to stream, from CoD to Hearthstone. Each streamer lives in a small cubicle, and there are hundreds upon hundreds of cubicles on the grounds of the Twitch Headquarters. deIlluminati
twitch chat
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Kripp

Hey kids, do you want some dank memes?

twitchquotes: ┴┬┴┤( ͡° ͜ʖ├┬┴┬ HEY KIDS DO YOU WANT SOME DANK MEMES?
twitch chat
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Classic

George Orwell ruined my life

I’m a huge fan of 1984, especially the writing of the characters and dialogue in it. There was a girl I liked at school, and I tried to think of the smartest and most clever way to ask her out. I decided to be like Winston, telling her how much I used to hate her and how I wanted to rape her and smash her head into a wall. However, instead of being wooed like I expected, she got mad at me and told the Principal and said I was “sexually harassing” her. It’s clear she just wasn’t intelligent enough for me and was embarrassed. However, no one wanted to hear my reasoning. I’ve been given detention and my parents have been informed, and despite how I’m clearly in the right everyone seems to think I’m some weirdo now. This truly is a dystopian society we live in......
September 2021

NA ULT LUL

twitchquotes: Listen up you fcking dweebs, this is a WAKE UP CALL to all those who type "NA ULT LUL". I'm from NA and let me tell you what happens when I use my Ultimate Ability (Q on PC, Triangle on PS4, Y on X-box 1). The enemy team is eviscerated. Decimated. Their souls are expelled from the server and banished to Hell. They wallow in their own filth and shit for 10,000 days and it is disgusting. So next time you type "NA ULT LUL" you fcking remember this post.
twitch chat
January 2017

Classic

Overwatch

Text-to-Speech Playing