[Copypasta] My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius

twitchquotes: My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next
twitch chat
June 2019
Famous line from the 2000 Gladiator film.
I used to be a real ad
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Infinite poop

twitchquotes: Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can't free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you've broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.
twitch chat
June 2019

Classic

WutFace alternative

⣿⣿⡿⣫⣾⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⡇⠱⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣤⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣛⡩⣩⣭⡹⣿⣿⣿⣿⠞⣛⣛⣛⡲⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⡾⣡⣾⣿⣷⣹⣿⣿⡿⣪⡻⠟⣱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡹⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⡇⠄⠄⣼⡇⣿⣻⣿⠟⡛⢿⣿⣾⣿⡇⢰⣍⢻⡿⠛⢿⣿⡭⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣧⣄⡀⣿⡇⣮⣽⣿⣮⣉⣾⣿⣿⣿⣇⡸⣿⣿⣆⠛⣰⣿⣾⡿⣿⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣇⡼⣄⣿⣿⡄⠙⢿⣏⣿⣿⡮⠁⣉⣾⣷⡈⠃⢿⣿⣬⡭⠝⣀⣿⠄⠄⠐ ⡆⡇⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠓⠛⣉⣉⣉⣉⣙⣛⠓⠾⣟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄⠙ ⠁⡇⣞⣿⡿⠋⠁⠄⠄⠈⠉⠙⠛⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⣶⣌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢗⢴⣆⢣ ⠸⣇⡻⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢻⣷⡌⢿⣿⣿⣿⢸⠼⣣⣾ ⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠛⠈⣿⡫⡼⢠⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣇⠄⣀⣠⡀⠄⠄⠴⠾⠿⠿⠶⠶⣦⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢨⠯⢁⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣦⢒⠤⣅⡶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣮⣍⠢⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⡐⠫⣉⡿⣬⡞⢿⣿⢯⠽⣶⡽⢟⣛⢖⣨⣛⠛⢃⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
July 2022

He logs onto his Paypal account

twitchquotes: Several hours later, Svenskeren sits alone in his room at the Cloud9 team house. All of the other players are fast asleep. He logs onto his Paypal account and a wan smile etches its way across his face.
twitch chat
March 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

You can't be kicked from an Among Us game

Did you know that InnerSloth (the owner of Among Us) says that you can't actually be kicked from a game by the owner? Section 34 of their TOS states that any individual who purchases a copy of the game has a right to play the game, and cannot be prevented from playing games by any individual. If you've kicked from a game recently, or want to learn more, google "Among Us rule 34"
February 2021

Among Us / Amogus

You have been visited by the KOMODO OF GOOD FORTUNE

twitchquotes: OSkomodo xD OSkomodo LeL OSkomodo xD OSkomodo LeL OSkomodo xD OSkomodo IF YOU SEE THIS WHILE SCROLLING you have been visited by the KOMODO OF GOOD FORTUNE. You will be blessed but only if you copy and paste this 3 times OSkomodo xD OSkomodo LeL OSkomodo xD OSkomodo LeL OSkomodo xD OSkomodo
twitch chat
October 2015

Classic

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