[Copypasta] Sir you have been found with Rocket League hacks

twitchquotes: Sir you have been found with Rocket League hacks. A SWAT team is on the way to your location. Make sure the door is open, otherwise they are ready to break it down. Don't destroy any evidence and don't contact your accomplices! Prepare disks, flash drives and any other multimedia devices containing illegal materials, proving your criminality. Be prepared to answer the questions during your interrogation! Cooperate and don't deny the charges against you.
twitch chat
June 2019
I used to be a real ad
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You're just typing in twitch chat

twitchquotes: My beautiful Hafu turns to me in bed and kisses me. Her cute smile fills me with happiness. Hafu holds me close as she whispers in my ear: "You know this isn't real. You're just typing in twitch chat. You're alone." "10/10 body." I miss lethal.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Amogus 700 years in the future

Imagine, 700 years in the future, through some last vestige of the internet kept in an underground server, a notification miraculously appears on your device (which has been preserved in nuclear dust from the 5th world war). One night, an alien working a late shift at the museum of archeology notices the cracked screen suddenly light up, and upon it, one word arises from the battered code: Amogus. They do not know what this word means. They ponder it deeply. They scour the ancient tomes, desperate to understand its mystifying origin. It drives them mad. Is it a primeval cipher? The motto of a bygone civilization? A message from God? Night after night they study it by candlelight. They flip through pages in books so old, the slightest cough would turn the paper to a fine off-white powder. The answer is nowhere to be found. And then they are struck by a revelation: I was not meant to know this word. Its esoteric nature escapes my grasp for a reason. What if its meaning is too enlightening to bear? With this revelation comes anger. Spite. Despair. Why shouldn't I understand it?! What cosmic forces are there at play to keep me from such knowledge?! In a fit of desperate rage, they shatter your device against a wall and exclaim, arms raised to the heavens: "This is literally 1984!" Silence... Their pleas are unanswered. Sadly, in the end, their inability to unlock the word's meaning drives them to suicide. Its secrets are never known. So I ask you this: is it better to die having never understood the true mind-bending nature of Amogus, or to be driven mad by the little spaceman in his blood-red suit? If you knew enlightenment would render you incapable of living on this mortal earth without making daily references to a game of space mafia, would you accept it? With knowledge comes power, but also endless suffering. Choose wisely, and be wary when standing at the edge of that great abyss we call "the Truth," lest you fall too deep.
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

This is the shittiest reply ever Overwatch version

twitchquotes: This is the shittiest reply ever. Overwatch requires camping, booping, stunning, sleeping, hacking, slamming, aimbotting and hitting shots. There are not “positions” in Overwatch. A kickers job is LITERALLY to kick. Horrible analogy, kind of embarrassing.
twitch chat
December 2019

Disabled sign

⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯ ⣯⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣯⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣧⣏⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇ ⣏⣧⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣯⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣇⣧⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣯ ⣧⣏⣇⣇⣇⣧⣧⣯⣯⡀⠀⠀⣤⣶⣿⣧⣏⣏⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇ ⣯⣯⣇⣧⣯⠛⠉⣿⣇⣇⠀⠀⣯⣏⣇⣇⣧⣧⣇⣧⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣏ ⣯⣯⠟⠁⠀⠀⣤⣿⣧⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇ ⣯⠋⠀⠀⣴⣿⣇⣧⣯⣯⠀⠀⢰⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣇⣏⣏⣧⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇ ⡏⠀⠀⣾⣯⣯⣏⣧⣏⣯⠀⠀⠈⠋⠋⠋⠋⠋⠋⠋⠋⠋⣯⣧⣧⣇⣇⣇⣧⣇ ⡂⠀⠀⣇⣧⣯⣧⣇⣇⣯⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⠀⠀⢫⣧⣏⣇⣇⣧⣇ ⣧⠀⠀⣿⣇⣯⣏⣯⣇⣇⣧⣏⣏⣇⣧⣧⣏⡏⠙⣧⣏⣦⠀⠀⠻⣧⣇⣇⣏⣇ ⣏⣄⠀⠈⢿⣧⣇⣇⣇⣇⣧⣏⣏⣏⣏⣯⠋⠀⠀⣼⣧⣯⣷⠀⠀⠙⣯⠏⢻⣏ ⣯⣏⣦⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣇⣧⣇⣧⣇⠟⠋⠀⠀⢀⣾⣇⣧⣇⣯⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿ ⣇⣇⣇⣏⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣾⣯⣯⣯⣧⣧⣧⣇⣏⣦⣮⣮⣮⣮
ascii art
January 2021

notices you have a bulge

twitchquotes: Rawr~nuzzles how are you daddy? pounces on you you’re so warm. owo? notices you have a bulge. someone’s happy! nuzzles your necky wecky~ murr~ hehehe. rubbies your bulgy wolgy you’re so big :oooo rubbies more on your bulgy wolgy it doesn’t stop growing uwu kisses you and lickies your neck. do you likie? im wagging my wittle baby tail all for your bulgy wolgy! come on daddy dont keep me waiting~
twitch chat
October 2020
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