[Copypasta] I hate Stuart Little

twitchquotes: I fucking hate Stuart Little. I know what you're thinking, this is some kind of funny joke, but no, Stuart Little is a piece of shit. A god damn rat got picked over actual children at an orphanage and he's supposed to be a hero? And I can't even tell you how many damn times I've seen a great parking space only to turn the corner and realise Stuart Little is already parked there in his stupid little fucking convertible.
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
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Am I the asshole for dropping my 6 year old son at an orphanage for his inability to trade options?

This started about 4 years ago when my son was 2 years old. I started to supplement his picture books and cartoons with beginner options books and Martin Shkerli's live videos on how to pick pharmaceutical stocks. Over the course of these years I feel like he has retained absolutely nothing even though I have spent every waking minute trying to make him understand. I have done almost everything that I have thought of including having Jerome Powell's speeches play while he is sleeping and only having Warren Buffet on the TV to try and make him understand the market. I felt as though I got to a breaking point when he couldn't differentiate between a straddle and a strangle even though we we went through different strategies for almost a month straight. I finally convinced my wife that we were doing the right thing when I said that he will soon be a Wendy's worker begging his wife's husband for a weekly allowance because he will never amount to be anything. I couldn't fathom raising a kid who was not able to able to make a profit from trading options by the time he was 10. With all that said if anyone wants a 6 year old child who is shitty at market strategy check out Eternal Sunny Orphanage in Omaha, Nebraska and maybe your luck will be better than mine with him.
September 2021

Am I The Asshole?

WallStreetBets

Rania's a DongDigger

twitchquotes: [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲̅)̲̅$̲̅] I ain't saying Rania's a DongDigger, but she ain't messin with no broke krippers [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲̅)̲̅$̲̅]
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Chibi Leona

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⣟⣛⣛⡛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⣿⡜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⣧⠄⠄⠱⡘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠘⣿⠇⠄⠄⠉⠱⢻⣿⡟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⣝⡲⢤⠄⠈⠢⡹⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⢠⠶⢄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢀⠘⢱⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣱⢄⠄⠈⠬⡛⢻⠟⠄⢰⠄⠄⠘⣃⣶⣘⣿⣈⣼⣷⣄⠄⠈⠁⠸⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⢣⣀⠄⢡⠈⢀⠄⠸⠇⠄⣴⠿⡿⣻⣿⣿⣿⠟⢛⡓⡄⠄⠄⠈⠋⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⠾⠯⠔⡴⠺⡠⠾⢛⢁⣴⣶⣿⢈⣿⠿⢿⣔⠿⠂⡙⡆⡀⡀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⠍⣁⢣⣀⠇⠰⣷⣸⣮⣭⣶⣿⣧⣛⣸⠻⢿⡇⠓⡁⢃⠌⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠼⢛⣱⣷⠄⠙⢿⣷⡬⢙⡛⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠷⠁⡟⠄⠄⡆⣉⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠉⠐⠄⠙⣼⡛⠿⠟⣴⠌⠄⠻⢦⣤⢃⢠⣄⠳⣝⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢁⡄⢰⣷⠸⠈⠐⠆⠆⠂⢁⣻⠄⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠓⠘⣿⡄⢻⡆⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⠄⢹⡌⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠄⢐⠸⣧⠘⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⡆⠈⣷⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣶⣦⠄⢀⡄⠉⠒⠬⡅⣿⠄⠻⣤⡀⠄⠄⣾⠇⢠⠏⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⢃⢠⡾⠁⠄⠠⠁⠄⠈⠑⢦⣈⠙⢶⣴⠏⠄⠎⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢣⡿⣾⠇⠄⠄⠄⢹⠄⠇⢹⠄⣈⡓⣄⡈⡈⣴⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣜⠇⣿⠄⠘⠋⠂⠊⠢⢴⠊⠈⠈⠁⠁⣄⠄⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣯⣤⠄⠄⡀⢰⣶⣶⣶⣦⠂⡀⠄⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣈⠒⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠨⠮⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
September 2021

League of Legends

I thought Jerma dreams were BS... until the other night

I thought Jerma dreams were BS... until the other night. I know I know. Another "I had a dream about Jerma" post. I've been thinking about whether or not to post this for the last 3 days, since everyone and their grandmas are doing these posts. But whatever. Three nights ago I dreamt that I was watching a jerma stream and he did something so utterly hilarious that I bursted out laughing so hard that I actually woke up from it. I looked for my phone to write down what he was doing (because it was 2 am and I needed to go back to sleep) but I couldn't find it for the life of me. Then in the corner of my eye a webcam appeared and it was Jerma laughing his ass off saying "chat he can't find it" and "he doesn't know pepeface". I was still dreaming lmao. I saw chat and it was just a wall of OMEGALULs. The whole situation was hilarious so then I woke up for real this time. Unfortunately because of the nature of the dream I can't remember what he was doing originally that was so funny. I think he was choking on a piece of bread or something.
March 2022
Jerma985

I'm a 13 year old atheist

twitchquotes: I'm a 13 year old atheist and it's funny seeing the 'minds' in twitch chat entertained by a children's videogame lmao. Whenever you idiots "Pog Champ" or "OMEGA LUL", I am studying the works of Plato, Sun Tzu, Richard and Mortimer etc. and expanding my knowledge. Guess who will have the better job in 10 years?
twitch chat
April 2018
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