[Copypasta] Fuck minecraft

twitchquotes: Fuck minecraft. I've had it with this dumb, misleading game. Do you know how much time I've spent digging through my backyard, only to find worms and dog shit? And what the fuck is with those fucked up graphics? NEWS FLASH, the real world is not comprised of blocks but actually of hundreds of atoms, stupid Notch. In fortnite (battle royale game) trees fall down when you cut them, but it stupid minecraft they float in the sky,wtf (what the fuck), where's the immersion?
twitch chat
January 2019
I used to be a real ad
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Eddy Pasterino and YouPorn wants to sponsor Reynad

twitchquotes: Wᴇʟʟ Mᴇᴛ ʀᴇʏɴᴀᴅ! ɪᴛ ɪs ғᴀᴍᴏᴜs ᴘᴏʀɴ ᴅɪʀᴇᴄᴛᴏʀ ᴇᴅᴅʏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ. ᴍʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴘᴀɴʏ (ʏᴏᴜᴘᴏʀɴ) ᴡᴀɴᴛs ᴛᴏ sᴘᴏɴsᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄᴀʀᴅsᴛᴏɴᴇ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ. ᴀs ᴘᴀʀᴛ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴛʀᴀᴄᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪʟʟ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ sᴛᴀʀ ɪɴ ᴏɴᴇ ᴏɴ ᴍʏ ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇs. ɪᴛ ᴅᴏᴇsɴ'ᴛ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ʟᴀᴅɪᴇs ɪɴ ɪᴛ ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°).
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July 2014
Reynad

Creeper

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀
September 2020

To be fair, you need a very high IQ to understand The Bible

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Bible. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Jesus’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike The Bible truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in God’s existential catchphrase "Never trust anyone completely but God." which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as King James's genius wit unfolds itself on the pages. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Bible tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
August 2021

Original Lollipoppy

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣠⣄⣀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀ ⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⣠⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠁⠀⢀⣿⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠙⠺⠭⣛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⡋⠁⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠹⠛⣻⠿⢿⣿⣿⡿⢠⠖⠀⠀⠈⠑⠤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣿⠃⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⠇⠀⢀⣄⡈⠐⠤⡀⠃⠀⠀⠴⡛⠍⠙⠂⠉⠻⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣴⡶⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⢳⣿⠀⠚⠁⣀⡈⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⠀⣠⣾⣿⢿⣫⣽⣶⣶⣮⠭⣛ ⣦⡄⠀⣿⣿⣿⡏⣼⡇⠀⡔⠛⠛⠃⠑⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠂⠀⠀⠀⣿⡿⠁⣿⡿⣱⣿⣿⠿⢛⣻⣏⣴⣿ ⠻⢷⣤⣝⣿⣿⡇⢹⡇⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠔⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⡇⠀⠘⢻⠛⠛⠿⡆⠘⣛⣻⣿⣷ ⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠿⣧⣾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⡤⠔⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⠀⠷⠾⠮⠳⠤⠘⡻⢾⣭⡉⢣ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢼⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⢟⣽⣿⣿⡁⡀⠲⣶⣶⣯⡻⣾⣷⣭⣥⣮⢻ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣷⣦⣤⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⠚⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠉⠙⠟⠉⠀⠈⠻⢿⣿⣶⣿⠿⢻⣯ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠻⣿⠿⠇⠛⠋⣯⣧⡃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⠀⠚⠉⠉
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League of Legends

🎄🎄MERRY CHRISTMAS BITCHES🎄🎄!!

🎄🎄MERRY CHRISTMAS BITCHES🎄🎄!! Now that it’s finally DICKmas 👅💦Santa’s about to slide 🎅🏾😉 down your hot 🔥 hot 🔥chimney tonight. So lick 💦💋those juicy candy canes and drink up that creamy eggnog🍼, it’s about to get wet down at Santa’s workshop🍆🍆! Don’t forgot to slide down that XXXtra 🎅🏾🎅🏾 big North Pole, and make sure your 🍪 cookie 🍪is yummy enough for Santa to eat👄! 👀 But are you bad enough to handle Santa’s giant juicy 8=candy👊🏼COCK=D💦?? Send this to 🔟 of your baddest bitch elves💁🏼💁🏾 If you get 5️⃣ back, youre on the naughty list this year🍆💦! If you get 🔟 back you better be ready for Santa’s hot ♨️CUMlate☕️💦😭 If you get 2️⃣0️⃣ back you’ve got the most bitchin 🍬peppermint 🍬pussy in the North Pole! ❄️⛄ Hope you get to blow 🌬 lots of XXXmas 🎄dick, and that you get lots of XXXmas 🎄CUMMIES 💝💝 HAVE A SLUTTY 💦🍆👅DICKMAS YOU HOE HOE HOE!!! 🎅🏾🎅🏿🎅🏽🎅🏼
April 2022

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Christmas

Holiday Emoji

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