[Copypasta] Twitch Chat containment solution

twitchquotes: International efforts to contain the most toxic and dangerous internet dwellers have failed time and time again, until a secret organisation offered to build a prison for internet's worst scum. The project codenamed "Twitch Chat" pretending to be an addition to a livestreaming service has proven to be a very effective containment solution.
twitch chat
January 2019
I used to be a real ad
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Kripp can't beat anyone

twitchquotes: My dad beats me FeelsBadMan My mom beats me FeelsBadMan My brother beats me FeelsBadMan My sister beats me FeelsBadMan At least I feel safe with Kripp, because he can't beat anyone FeelsGoodMan
twitch chat
September 2016
Kripp

Classic

Hunters are compelled by a mysterious force to attack face

twitchquotes: After months of careful and thorough research, I have discovered that Hunters, quite literally, do NOT have the capacity to trade minions. They are physically unable to attack an opponents minion with one of theirs. They a compelled by some mysterious force to mindlessly attack the face of their opponent.
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad

Reginaldo

twitchquotes: hi mi name is regi i live from canada i walk 200 miles to get to computer in alaska to play lgend league because iwant be pro player like qqpie and cumshotgg pls no coffee papapino dunkacino pasterino.
twitch chat
July 2014
HotshotGG

League of Legends

Pink Panther

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ascii art
April 2021

Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp
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