[Copypasta] James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Sorry, I've dropped my DREADSTEED DECK

twitchquotes: β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜ Sorry, I've dropped my DREADSTEED DECK β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜ Sorry, I've dropped my DREADSTEED DECK β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜ β™ž β™˜
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August 2015
Kripp

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Kripp wins Best Actor

twitchquotes: It is the 2018 Oscars and Tom Hanks stands at the podium to announce Best Actor. β€œBoy,” he says, β€œwe got a real competition this year! Johnny Depp, Leo DiCaprio, George Clooney, anyone could win!” The world holds its breath to see who will win the most prestigious acting award in the world. β€œWow!” says Hanks. β€œI don’t believe it! The winner is Kripparrian in his β€˜Unsponsored’ Hero Academy 2β„’ Stream!”
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

EU hearthstone expansion delayed

twitchquotes: LUL I am from EU LUL my breath smells like poo LUL Expansion delayed LUL And the server's down too LUL
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

EU vs NA

As I approached the Kripp with my bulging juiced up biceps

twitchquotes: As I approached the Kripp with my bulging juiced up biceps, I heard a snicker. "Soda is healthier than milk, dude" says the Kripp. With one look at him I can already tell the only thing he lifts is card packs. Just as I'm about to punch him, he top decks Big Game Hunter and I am shot dead. "Who's juiced now?" smirks the Kripp.
twitch chat
November 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Did you ever hear the tragedy of Open the Waygate?

twitchquotes: Did you ever hear the tragedy of Open the Waygate? I thought not. It’s not a story the f2p btw would tell you. It’s a P2W legendary. Open the Waygate was a Quest from Journey to Un’Goro, so powerful and so astounding it could use Time Warp to influence the end turn button to create another turn… It had such a knowledge of the spaghetti code that it could even keep the worthy opponents it faced from having a turn. The spaghetti code is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be imbalanced. It became so powerful… the only thing it was afraid of was losing its power, which eventually, of course, it did. Unfortunately, it drew every card from its deck, then its worthy opponent set it to one health. Ironic. It could stop others from drawling, but not itself.
twitch chat
April 2017

Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise

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