[Copypasta] James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

I used to be a real ad
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What has my life come to? I'm sitting in an empty room

twitchquotes: What has my life come to? I'm sitting in an empty room, behind my wooden pc watching a guy play a card game for children, probably earning my yearly salary in a week's time. All of my ambitions are now gone. Only thing that i have left is my old pc and a memory of who i once was...
twitch chat
June 2019

Hearthstone

This guy's wallet is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: ☑ “This guy's wallet is CRAZY!” ☑ “My bank account can't win against a payment like that” ☑ "He NEEDED precisely those two credit cards to win" ☑ “He bought the only card that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect purchase" ☑ “There was nothing I could buy" ☑ “I paid that perfectly"
twitch chat
February 2017

Hearthstone

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

Genuine Kripp Smile

twitchquotes: Look at him, look at that smile. That's a genuine Kripp Smile™ there if I ever saw one. Now chat, if you pay close attention you'll realize that these rare, genuine demonstrations of happiness only actually happen when Kripp is playing Hearthstone. Not Artifact, not Magic, not anything else. Hearthstone is where Kripp's heart really is at. We just have to understand and support that, no matter what.
twitch chat
December 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp is a professional children's card game streamer

twitchquotes: Who the hell do you think you kids are? Kripp is a professional children's card game streamer and mobile games salesman, and you think you can just come in his chat and criticize him and his plays like you know something he doesn't? Get real. Maybe if you ate your veggies like my boy Kripp, you'd have the brainpower to make crazy split-second analytical decisions that can beat the other kids on the playground. Show some fucking respect
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

lethal

twitchquotes: Amaz moans hard as Kripp gropes his smallish package. “Pepperoni” Kripp whispered into Amaz’s elvish ear, as they started making out. “Do…do I win?” Amaz says tentatively, as Kripp slowly tugs away his pants. “Your deck is crazy” Kripp says, as he flips Amaz on his back. “It’s lethal guys” Amaz says playfully, as he presents his Twisting Nether.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

KappaPride

Text-to-Speech Playing