[Copypasta] James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

I used to be a real ad
More Hearthstone Copypastas

IF YOU TOUCH THE ARMOR, GO TO SLEEP

twitchquotes: SLEEP TEST 🛡️ IF YOU TOUCH THE ARMOR, GO TO SLEEP ⎝ ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
August 2019

Hearthstone

Kripp tryhard alert

twitchquotes: Kripp tryhard alert: ☑ Netdeck ☑ Decktracker ☑ ArenaValue ☑ Blocking chat with cam to hide secret strats ☐ Legend Cardback
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Rania and her Puerto Rican lover in 2017

twitchquotes: The year is 2017 - Rania is playing hardstone while her puerto rican lover performs felatio on her. She queues into an UNKNOWN and instantly receives a message from the Kripp. "This is so unfair! It`s not my fault vegans can`t eat p*#sy! You have 30 minutes to come back home before I shoot myself and dex in the face with my vegan gun!" She aggressively slams the desk: "DAMN IT!". "Que se pasa amor" Antonio looks up perplexed, She replies: "Turn 1 go first zombie chow...".
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Purify is not particularly fun or interactive

twitchquotes: Purify created a strategy that revolved around trying to lose to your opponent in one turn without requiring any cards on the board. Silencing your own minions and battles between the players and Blizzard make an overall game of Hearthstone more fun and compelling, but spending 2 mana on a trash card in one turn is not particularly fun or interactive.
twitch chat
August 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

This is the Totemic Might police

twitchquotes: ◥·̿Ĺ̯·̿ ̿◤ This is the Totemic Might police, you're coming with us Reynad. ◥·̿Ĺ̯·̿ ̿◤
twitch chat
August 2015
Reynad

Hearthstone

More Hearthstone Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing