[Copypasta] James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Hearthstone Copypastas

Boring to watch, boring to play, it's Brawl Day

twitchquotes: ResidentSleeper BORING TO WATCH ResidentSleeper BORING TO PLAY ResidentSleeper GRAB YOUR PILLOWS ResidentSleeper ITS BRAWL DAY ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
October 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

You're just typing in twitch chat

twitchquotes: My beautiful Hafu turns to me in bed and kisses me. Her cute smile fills me with happiness. Hafu holds me close as she whispers in my ear: "You know this isn't real. You're just typing in twitch chat. You're alone." "10/10 body." I miss lethal.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp from the future

twitchquotes: BibleThump HEY ITS KRIPP FrOM the future here trying to tell you to stop playing this childrens game while you can. IF NOT you will play this game for 40 years in a row and it will take a toll on your health. i have been declared clinacly insane and have been staying at a looney bin forced to eat meat everyday BibleThump
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Hearthstone cardback

β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–„β–€β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆ
July 2015

Hearthstone

gwent is a really, really bad game

twitchquotes: gwent is a really, really bad game. Hearthstone is where it is at PogChamp (Copy and paste this message into the twitch channel: nl_Kripp, for the reward of: 1 x Classic Pack for Hearthstone. Blizzard rewards those that are loyal. Don't include this in the message.)
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

sellout

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing