[Copypasta] James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

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BOB “You’re doing GREAT out there!”

twitchquotes: BOB “You’re doing GREAT out there!” I exclaim with as much enthusiasm as I can this late in the day. The scraggly vegan is the only one left in the tavern, his attention focused entirely on the card game we put out to entertain children and toddlers. “I don’t wanna talk about it guys” cries the man, knocking his cup of vegan water over. I try to reassure him that everyone has bad luck now and then, but he just ignores me, as always. This tavern attracts some strange types indeed.
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Hi I'm Reynad, I run a website called Tempo Storm...

twitchquotes: Hi I'm Reynad, I run a website called Tempo Storm where I post decklists for Hearthstone players to peruse. Don't you dare use them though, or I'll insult you for playing the decks I posted online
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Kripp plays Armor Up Warrior

twitchquotes: Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes. His face comes closer as he plants his wet lips onto mine. We are locked together in a beautiful display of love. Then I wake up. I look at Kripp's stream. He is playing Armor Up Warrior. Now I remember why I fell asl... ResidentSleeper
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Are you going to pay for another pizza?

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp! So here I was enjoying my favorite food (pizza) and watching your stream having a good time when it started to taste extra salty. It turns out you were being super salty and now have ruined my pizza. Are you going to pay for another pizza or will I have to call the cops? This is serious.
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March 2015
Kripp

Classic

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salty

Obey the call of Kel'Thuzad!

twitchquotes: ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ　Ｍｉｎｉｏｎｓ，　ｓｅｒｖａｎｔｓ，　ｓｏｌｄｉｅｒｓ　ｏｆ　ｔｈｅ　ｃｏｌｄ　ｄａｒｋ，　ｏｂｅｙ　ｔｈｅ　ｃａｌｌ　ｏｆ　Ｋｅｌ’Ｔｈｕｚａｄ！ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ
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