[Copypasta] James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

I used to be a real ad
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Babbling book is quickly becoming one of my favorite cards

twitchquotes: Babbling book is quickly becoming one of my favorite cards. It's just so positive and generous. Practically costs nothing at all at one mana you drop him on the board and that chill ass mofo gives you a spell to use later in the game. And you also get this adorable little 1/1 can ping things but usually is too harmless to be removed. But more than the BB is just so positive. It comes on the board like "do you want to cast a spell?" and I'm like "yeah BB i do want to cast a spell let's do this shit" and when he attacks he's like "SPELLS ARE FUN" and I'm like "yeah they are SO FUN." He doesn't say some bullshit macho shit like "I will destroy you" he's just like "nah spells are fun." And it looks so happy. I mean this is an inanimate object literally brought to life by magic. It understands it's life is a temporary magical gift and the dude is just fucking loving it. I mean look at his face he's just so happy. I am literally never sad when babbling book is on board. IDK if he's gonna make it into the metagame or not but for now he (or she) a pretty chill card
twitch chat
December 2016

Classic

Hearthstone

King Kamehameha

twitchquotes: Aloha Forsen, my name is King Kamehameha, King of Hawaii. I want to invite you to come to our tropical island paradise to teach us Cardstone. You will be compensated with a million palm leaves (over 10 million Swedish dollars). We would love to hear from you. Please no copypasterino
twitch chat
January 2015
Forsen

Hearthstone

Toast the rarity of your reveal card was nerfed

twitchquotes: Toast, this is Blizzard employee. The rarity of your reveal card was just nerfed to common. To get a rare card, please mention the new expansion at least 4 more times.
twitch chat
July 2019
DisguisedToast

Hearthstone

Ben Brode increased Kripp's odds for going second

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, Ben Brode here. After checking your account, we noticed that your odds for going second were accidentally set to "60" % instead of "50"%. We apologize for the inconvenience, as this change was mean to be applied to a "reynad" account. The issue is on our radar, and we will patch it when we can. Thank you and have a good day!
twitch chat
February 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

This guy's deck is average

twitchquotes: ☑ “This guy's deck is average” ☑ “My deck wins about half of the time against a deck like that” ☑ "He played precisely those two cards" ☑ “He topdecked a mediocre card for a mediocre turn” ☑ "He had several cards" ☑ “There were multiple options open to me” ☑ “I played that"
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

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