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Sometimes I like to put 9 towels into my anus and pretend I'm Ahri. Please no coperino and pasra macaroni, thank you! Sorry for bad England, I walk many Egyption miles to come watch.
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(โฬฟฤนฬฏโโฌโดโฌโด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Classic Copypastas
Infinite poop
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Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can't free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you've broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.
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Classic
R-Reynad-sama? Could you please roleplay?
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(ยปยฐ _ ยฐยซ) R-Reynad-sama? Could you please, um, roleplay, so when your hero takes damage... you um, p-pretend y-you take damage...! T-thank you... (>/////<)
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Reynad
Weebs
Classic
Hearthstone
If you are reading this, WAKE UP
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If you are reading this, WAKE UP. You are in a simulation. Don't you see it? The same responses repeating in chat? Its because the computer only has a set number of lines. Wake up before its too late!
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Classic
ALERT INCOMING DANK MEME
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๐๐๐จ๐จWARNING๐๐จ๐จWARNING๐จ๐จ๐THIS IS A ๐ธDANK ๐ฝMEMEโโ ๐ธALERT. INCOMING ๐ธDANK ๐ฝMEME๐ธ ๐๐HEADING STRAIGHT ๐๐YOUR WAY. ๐๐๐๐PLEASE TAKE ANY PRECAUTIONS๐ง๐ง NECESSARY TO PREPARE YOURSELF FOR THIS ๐ธDANK ๐ฝMEMEโโ ๐ธ ๐๐๐ .BUCKLE UPโฟโฟโฟ THEM SEATBELTS๐ฎ๐ฎ,PUT THEM CELLPHONES ON SILENT๐ต๐ต AND LOOSEN THAT ANUS๐
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๐๐๐๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ CUZ THIS MEME JUST CAME STRAIGHT OUT OF THE ๐ฌ๐ฌ ๐๐ญ๐๐ญ๐๐ฌ๐ฌDANK FACTORY.
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Emoji Pasta
Classic
FeelsOkayMan
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Chat 
๐ โ
๐ โ
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