[Copypasta] Dan from the next room over

twitchquotes: Hello this is Dan from the next room over. Can you shut the fuck up for 2 minutes it's almost 2am and I can still hear you. I have had a hard day doing REAL work for 13 hours and all I want is a bit of peace and quiet. LOL just kidding it's Tanner from highschool again, enjoy playing your kids games while I'm hanging out with Becca. We're watching re-runs of that time you lost that little card game tournament. Peace out, squirt
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

Tanner from High School

I used to be a real ad
More Hearthstone Copypastas

Toast the rarity of your reveal card was nerfed

twitchquotes: Toast, this is Blizzard employee. The rarity of your reveal card was just nerfed to common. To get a rare card, please mention the new expansion at least 4 more times.
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July 2019
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James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
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Kripp invites Hotform to a friendly Fireside duel

twitchquotes: Hotform sees another invite to a friendly Fireside duel from Kripp and wants to move into fetal curl, but his hand is chained to the heater. Rania steps next to his laptop, putting dry bread and tap water down. “Come, Hotform, it is only 3 more hours today. You can even have some lettuce for dinner.” His eyes tear up while he accepts the invite and mulligans his hand, but then he sees Kripp’s first minion: Lucentbark. “No, nononono, please, please! Kill me! Just kill me! CHAT! CHAT HELP ME!”
twitch chat
August 2019
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Get Jousted

twitchquotes: ╰༼.◕ヮ◕.༽つ¤=[]———— Get Jousted
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Kripp's lettuce points

twitchquotes: The year is 2035. Kripp's lettuce points have quickly developed into one of the most valuable crypto currencies in the world. Elsewhere, Tanner sits alone in his dark, dingy apartment, watching Kripp's stream, desperately trying to gamble for some lettuce points. He types "!bet 2 all" in chat, and anxiously awaits the results. Upon seeing Kripp go 0-3, Tanner puts a gun to his head and lets out one final "never lucky" before pulling the trigger.
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

Tanner from High School

Text-to-Speech Playing