[Copypasta] Why am I always being put in the friend zone

twitchquotes: Why am I always being put in the friend zone. I'm a nice guy, work a nice job, and would do anything for m'lady. In the end these girls always go after DOUCHEBAG guys who treat them like shit, and only talk to me to cry about it. I'm sick of being considered 'beta' or whatever you call it.
twitch chat
November 2018
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

F to pay McRespects

Ma'am, you may want to McSit™ down for this. We are deeply McSorry™ to inform you your husband has McPerished™ in the McLine™ of duty. He bravely led a McCharge™ against the Burger Emperor's Army™, and through his McBravery™ we were able to hold the McLine™ long enough for McReinforcements™ to arrive. Your husband is being awarded the Grimace Medal of McHonor™ for his McService™, and for his McBravery™ we will be sending you a complimentary Happy Meal™ as a token of appreciation. His service to the McMarine™ Corps will never be forgotten.
January 2021

abortion is 300$, plan B is 30$, a condom is 5$, but being gay is free

abortion is 300$, plan B is 30$, a condom is 5$, but being gay is free. the choice is yours. Don't bother trying to escape, i've connected a car battery to your balls.
April 2022

hackermans

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣶⣾⣿⣶⣦⣤⣀⠄⢀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣷⡹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣯⣵⣾⣿⣿⡶⠦⠭⢁⠩⢭⣭⣵⣶⣶⡬⣄⣀⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⡀⠘⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠩⠶⠚⠻⠟⠳⢶⣮⢫⣥⠶⠒⠒⠒⠒⠆⠐⠒ ⠄⢠⣾⢇⣿⣿⣶⣦⢠⠰⡕⢤⠆⠄⠰⢠⢠⠄⠰⢠⠠⠄⡀⠄⢊⢯⠄⡅⠂⠄ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠘⢼⠬⠆⠄⢘⠨⢐⠄⢘⠈⣼⡄⠄⠄⡢⡲⠄⠂⠠⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣥⣀⡁⠄⠘⠘⠘⢀⣠⣾⣿⢿⣦⣁⠙⠃⠄⠃⠐⣀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣋⣵⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⣶⣾⣿⣿⡉⠉⠉ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣫⣥⣬⣭⣛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣏⣙⠿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣍⣙⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣛⣩⣶⠄ ⣛⣛⣛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣮⣙⠿⢿⣶⣶⣭⣭⣛⣛⣛⣛⠛⠛⠻⣛⣛⣛⣛⣋⠁⢀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣬⢙⡻⠿⠿⣷⣤⣝⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⠛⠛⣛⣛⠛⣡⣴⣿ ⣛⣛⠛⠛⠛⣛⡑⡿⢻⢻⠲⢆⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⡴⢻⢋⠻⣟⠈⠿⠿ ⣿⡿⡿⣿⢷⢤⠄⡔⡘⣃⢃⢰⡦⡤⡤⢤⢤⢤⠒⠞⠳⢸⠃⡆⢸⠄⠟⠸⠛⢿ ⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸
ascii art
November 2021

Pepe

Coming out as morbsexual

In honor of Pride Month, I am here to say that it's morbin' time. Today, my fellow morbheads, we rise. I am proud to come out and express my true morbdentity to the world at this very morbment. I am a morbphile and I identify myself as morbsexual. My pronouns are morb/ius.
June 2022

Morbius

Seafood dinner over skype on a dial up internet connection

twitch chat
January 2015
strifecro
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing