[Copypasta] Why am I always being put in the friend zone

twitchquotes: Why am I always being put in the friend zone. I'm a nice guy, work a nice job, and would do anything for m'lady. In the end these girls always go after DOUCHEBAG guys who treat them like shit, and only talk to me to cry about it. I'm sick of being considered 'beta' or whatever you call it.
twitch chat
November 2018
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Christmas for a wsb trader

As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some. How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully. “Are you coming to bed?” your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. You’ll stop soon, though. “Soon!” you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps. The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they halt—the alternation feature broken—on red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like they’re bleeding. Like your calls. After a time—hours?—you realize you’re sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Kripp's high time in coma

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is doctor Jeffrey Shih from the Athens General Hospital. You’ve been in a coma for several years now due to an overload of copypasta. I’m trying out a new method to get through to you. Please wake up! Your family misses you very much. Please wake up, you *** retard!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Pennywise

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣭⡈⠙⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣭⡈⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⡿⠉⢻⡆⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢸⡿⠉⢻⡆⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡛⠴⠛⠁⣸⣿⣿ ⠄⣿⣿⣦⡛⠴⠛⠁⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡝⢿⣿⣿ ⢀⣾⣷⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⠿⠟⠋ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠙⠻⢿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣤⣀⣠⡤⠞⡋⡍⠄⠂⠄⠄ ⢿⣿⣿⡿⢻⣿⣦⠄⠘⣿⡁⣾⣹⡍⣁⠐⡆⡇⠁⡌⠄⠄⠄⣰ ⣿⣿⣿⢁⣾⣿⣿⣷⡘⢻⣧⣇⡟⢿⢿⠄⢷⢸⡧⠁⠄⠄⢰⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡹⢹⠸⢣⢈⠘⡇⠘⠈⠄⠁⠄⠄⣼⣏ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⣷⡀⠄⠸⢿⣿⡏⣾⠓⠃⠄⠄⢀⡟⠎ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⡤⣼⣷⡀⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⡞⣼⡴ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣻⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣭⣥⣤⣤⣶⣾⡟⠑⠋⠄
August 2019

Reddit and Twitter changed their logos

twitchquotes: My entire life I’ve been a hardcore anti-minority white man who despised anyone who didn’t look like me, but today I saw reddit and twitter changed their logos to the color black, and now I’m sitting here in shock just thinking about my choices in life. Wow.
twitch chat
June 2020

MOM I NEED V-BUCKS

twitchquotes: ❗️✋ OK MOM ✋❗️WE NEED TO TALK 😡😤 I NEED V-BUCKS 😜💵 I'VE MADE STRAIGHT A'S 😎🤨 I'VE CLEANED MY ROOM 😫🤬 I'VE TAKEN OUT THE TRASH 🗑️🔫 I CUT THE CATS ASSHOLE HAIR 😏👏 NOW I NEED YOU 🧐👉 TO BUY ME V-BUCKS 😎🔥 I'VE GOTTA SHOW 🤯🤬 MY CLOUT ON FORTNITE 🔥😎💯 NOW I'LL BE IN BED 😴💤 BY NINE BECAUSE IT'S A SCHOOL NIGHT 😔📚🚸
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite

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