[Copypasta] Blizzard has been working hard on Diablo Immortal

twitchquotes: This chat is so ungrateful. Blizzard has been working so hard crunching hours to develop a new Diablo game for their long-term fans, giving it an extra Blizzard polish and publishing it on the world's most popular gaming console, Mobile, to enable many of their fans to be able to play. Yet these same "fans" demand a "better" game. How can a game be "better", when a game is a game? smh beta nerds these days.
twitch chat
November 2018
Blizzard's Diablo Immortal announcement at Blizzcon was highly unpopular
I used to be a real ad
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Please use the code Tempo to save 3% off...

twitchquotes: BibleThump Andrey Yanuk otherwise known as Reynad has passed away this Saturday's afternoon. He was ambushed by a group of dongers in an alley, and stabbed with a kniferino made out of a salt shaker. His last words were "please use the code "Tempo" to save 3% off the funeral costs and bury me in my tempostorm tshirt". Rest in peace pepperoni cappuccino pistachio bro. You shall be missed. Please no copy pasterino cappuccino
twitch chat
November 2015
Reynad

sellout

Jack Ma goes missing

Jack Ma is making poop emoji pillows in a factory now 11 hours a day and you guys are making jokes about him šŸ˜”
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Minecraft, but he's torturing my cock and balls.

In this video, I have to beat Minecraft while my friend is torturing my cock and balls. He has a humbler, a stretcher and can actively kick them at any time he wishes. Can I beat the Ender Dragon before my testicles are ruptured? Watch to find out. Also, according to Youtube statistics, only a small percentage of people who watch my videos are actually subscribed, so if you end up liking this video, consider subscribing. It's free and you can always unsubscribe. Enjoy the video.
June 2021

We didn't start the fire (emoji pasta)

šŸ‘«WE šŸ˜”DIDNā€™TšŸ¤ŖSTARTāŒTHEšŸ˜¾ FIRE šŸ”„ IT šŸ¤ØWAS šŸ¤¬ALWAYSšŸ¤©BURNINGšŸ„µ SINCE šŸ˜§THEāœØWORLDSšŸŒ BEENšŸ˜»TURNING
June 2021

Emoji Pasta

AITA for ending my marriage over Animal Crossing??

I (65m) and my wife 24(f) have been together for 8 years, married for 4. All my friends are jealous that i was able to score such a hot young woman but itā€™s starting to cause some problems in our relationship believe it or not. When the pandemic hit, I was very nervous since Iā€™m not in great health. We decided to buy the Nintendo Switch and play this game called Animal Crossing. I guess itā€™s popular with the kids? Anywho, we start building this town and everything was fine at first. Then, my wife decides that she wants to remodel the town. No problem. But she starts cutting down all the trees, destroying the cliffs, removing the river, etc... I told her this is out of line. We should respect nature not destroy it. Her answer? It was ugly and she didnā€™t like to walk the long way around. She also takes all of my hard earned money from fishing and gambles it all away on turnip stocks. Last week she spent 400k on turnips and sold them for 260k. Do you know how many red snappers I need to catch to make that back up? Iā€™m trying to retire soon and itā€™s making me think she doesnā€™t know how to manage money. What really drove me to the breaking point, my best friend Boon is on the island and we really get along. He likes to lift weights, so do I. I log into the game one day and build him a gift. When I try to find him, heā€™s nowhere to be found... I ask, where is boon? She doesnā€™t answer. Where is Boon ?? She says ā€œI kicked him off the island, he was annoyingā€. Reddit, she kicked my best friend off the island without even talking to me. The next day I filed for divorce and kicked her out. Iā€™m keeping the switch and rebuilding our town. Hopefully Boon comes back. AITA or did I doge a bullet with my sociopathic (ex)wife? Edit: Thank you all for the support and messages over the last 24hrs. Itā€™s been a wild day but the good news is that after a few hours of island hopping I was able to find Boon and convince him to come back to my island. Seems like things are heading in the right direction.
August 2021

AITA

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