[Copypasta] Blizzard has been working hard on Diablo Immortal

twitchquotes: This chat is so ungrateful. Blizzard has been working so hard crunching hours to develop a new Diablo game for their long-term fans, giving it an extra Blizzard polish and publishing it on the world's most popular gaming console, Mobile, to enable many of their fans to be able to play. Yet these same "fans" demand a "better" game. How can a game be "better", when a game is a game? smh beta nerds these days.
twitch chat
November 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

only a real human being can buld a prper face

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ‘ ๐Ÿ‘ƒ ๐Ÿ‘ only a real human being can build a proper face ๐Ÿ‘„
twitch chat
May 2017

Copyright infringement of copypastas

twitchquotes: TWITCH CHAT, this is the POLICE. We have heard rumors that you have been performing illegal actions, such as copyright infringement in this stream. You must cease your use of these copy(righted)pastas immediately or you will be arrested for your crimes. Internet piracy is NOT a victimless crime, and you WILL be punished.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Captain Cucumber of the Vegan Police

twitchquotes: DatSheffy ๐Ÿ“ข ATTENTION, OCTAVIAN MOROSAN! This is Captain Cucumber of the Vegan Police! You have been accused of violating the Supreme Vegan Charter by drafting beast cards in your arena decks and forcing them to fight for you! This is a blatant act of animal exploitation and is punishable by death! Surrender peacefully and we will make it a quick and painless one! This is your only warning!
twitch chat
December 2017
Kripp

Classic

My husband of 5 years bought me Reddit Gold for my anniversary

My 5-Year anniversary with my husband was last week. The traditional gift for 5 years is silverware. I wanted a new set and told my husband which he could get me as a gift. I knew he wanted an Apple Watch and bought that as my gift to him. On the day of our anniversary, I logged onto Reddit to find dozens of my posts and comments guilded. I found it odd as I donโ€™t post terribly often and the guilded comments were old. Itโ€™s also the first time Iโ€™ve received Reddit gold. When the time came to exchange gifts, he gleefully opened his Apple Watch and begin setting it up. I figured Iโ€™m all the excitement he forgot to give me my gift so I gently prodded him. He told me to check Reddit. Ladies and Gentlemen, my husband GUILDED me 24 times as an anniversary gift. Heโ€™s a bit of a jokester, so I figured my real gift was coming. But Reddit, itโ€™s been a week. Do I say something? Buy the silverware myself? Some combination of the two? I feel if I donโ€™t say something then the cycle will repeat itself.
September 2021

Reddit

Gimme gimme chicken tendies

twitchquotes: FeelsGoodMan Gimme gimme chicken tendies, be they crispy or from Wendys. Spend my hard-earned good-boy points, on Kid's Meal ball pit burger joints. Mummy lifts me to the car, to find me tendies near and far. Enjoy my tasty tendie treats, in comfy big boy booster seats. FeelsGoodMan
twitch chat
August 2016
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing