[Copypasta] Things escalated from there

twitchquotes: I lost my virginity while listening to this song 5 years ago, it's a funny story really.. i had just finished my gym workout and i was in the locker room all sweaty, and in walks this leather dressed jabroni.. he seemed confused as to where he was.. i told him he might have gotten the wrong door, then he got very rude and said "fuck you", then i said "nah fuck you leatherman" and then things escalated from there
twitch chat
July 2018
I used to be a real ad
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Infinite Cum Part 3

Your release had increased so much that they could no longer contain you. Your cum has consumed the entirety of the cosmos. Humanity is without a shred of doubt, gone. You are alone in the universe. If there were aliens, they are dead now. It’s over. In despair, you mourn the death of the scientists, of humanity, of everyone. You realize you'll never hear her sweet and calming voice, see her proud body. Your sad. Your terrified. Chronicles pass. The last stars in the universe eclipse. You silently watch as the last atoms break into protons, into quarks, into mere beams of weak energy that disperse along the vertical ropes. But the ropes no longer play their docile music. They have gonne silent. You watch, helplessly, as the Last mozon is engulfed into the ever expanding plane of Cum. Your own creation destroys the very own universe, defying the own plan of existence. You are alone. You scream, but nothing comes out of your mouth. You cry, but nothing descends from your eyes. Do you even have eyes? All you can see is the torrid Instotucional white across the whole of the Universe. Entire Gans eclipse before your eyes, but then you realize the horror: The Cum turned against you. With nothing more to consume, your sons turned against their father, and begin to consume you. You tremble. There's nothing to do. The huge weight impacts you like if whole planets fell onto your shoulders. Your alone. In your last moments, a odd sentiment of peace invades you for the first time since the early days of the universe. It's finally gonna end. You think about all the people that you've met during your stay in this universe. In the end, you think about the researcher. About her arms. Her breasts. You feel... good. For the first time in many hipereons. You jack off it. It's so.... good, you come at the right time, freeing the constrained cum from your menber. You open your eyes, and behold the bathroom door. You are Ok. You remember everything. It's all over. You exit the bathroom after jacking off again, going back to your old life. The cum stops.
April 2022

Infinite Cum

Memeing harder than anyone I've ever seen on this website

twitchquotes: wow dude you just memed harder than anyone i've ever seen on this website. How many memes did you acquire before graduating from Memeing University? Do you meme over 9000 times a day, because the fact that you are such an expert memer points in that direction. God damn I have never seen a meme as epic and dank as this in my entire life, and i am quite the meme master myself, creating over 500 popular memes on the mememunity s4s and danking and memeing for the last five years (though you obviously experience time in meme years at this point, which makes me meme my meme to you sir, i mean meme) I really wish i could meme as hard as you because than my meme would meme and then memes would be dank as a meme! rite, amirite? lol and lel and kek but really sir, thank you for being dank as *** and posting such sweet meme as this, it made me meme until my meme went memeside out and meme'd me harder than a meme memeing meme you fuggin meme :D
twitch chat
November 2014
TheRace

Cinco de Mayo origin

Most people don’t know but back in 1912, Hellman’s mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of this delicious condiment, scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, which was to be the port for the great ship after its stop in New York. This would have been the largest ever shipment on mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico. But as we know the great ship did not make it to New York. This ship hit an iceberg and sank and the cargo was forever lost. The people of Mexico, who were crazy about the tantalising condiment, and were eagerly awaiting the delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. The anguish was so great that they declared a national day of warning which they sill observe to this day. The national day of mourning occurs every year on the 5th of May, you probably know it as Cinco de Mayo
May 2021

Trolling my whole class with Among Us Part 3

We had a school assembly today, and the speaker was talking about bullying. The speech was pretty boring, but there came a point in his presentation where he said "I know there are some students among us who have been subject to bullying." Honestly, I couldn't believe my ears. I thought, "There is no way the speaker just said Among Us." I decided to troll the speaker by standing up and yelling "When the imposter is sus!" while making a huge grin (just like in the memes). To my surprise, no one laughed. Everyone fell dead silent and looked at me. The speaker said "I'm sorry, what was that?" I decided to explain to everyone what I was talking about, and said "Get it guys? It's from Among Us." Still, no one understood the reference. I turned towards my friend Caleb (I know him from band), and said "You get it, right? It's from among us!" However, he had his head buried into his lap. I looked at my friend Dalton (He plays the trumpet in band, just like I do), and yelled "Dalton, do you get the joke????" He didn't even make eye contact. Suddenly, the assistant principal came up behind me and said "Please sit down, this is a school assembly." I screamed back at her "SCHOOL ASSEMBLY?? MORE LIKE EMERGENCY MEETING!" I then naruto ran down to the stage, pointed at the assistant principal, and said "SHE'S SUS!!! I SAW HER FAKE A SCAN IN MEDBAY!" Still, no one laughed. I then said "I'm not the imposter, I was in vents the whole time!!" (referencing a meme). No one understood the reference. I saw people whispering to each other, but no one laughed. I then made a face resembling the "big chungus" meme, and said "You guys don't get it?? That's not very Wholesome 100." When I realized no one was laughing, I yelled "Don't any of you guys use reddit?" The audience was dead silent, until someone yelled "Sit down!" (which was very rude and not wholesome) I pointed back at him and shouted "You're breathtaking!!" I don't think anyone got the joke becaude no one laughed, so I said "Do you guys know who Keanu Reeves is?" No one responded, which is kind of cringe because I thought that at least SOMEONE would know who Keanu is. I ended up getting escorted to the principal's office and getting suspended for a week, but in my opinion, it was totally worth it. I trolled EVERYONE. I'm gonna forever go down in Reddit history. I also realized that there aren't any redditors at my school (which is very cringe in my opinion).
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

Daga Kotowaru (I refuse)

⣼⠀⠀⢻⠿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣟⣒⠶⠿⢿⣷⣷⣦⣟⣻⡿⠿⣷⣶⣭ ⠻⣄⢀⡤⠤⠴⠛⢦⣩⡭⠗⢺⡿⠯⠽⢿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣽⣟⣻⣿⣷⣶⣶⣦ ⠀⠹⣾⠁⣀⠀⠀⣊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠙⢦⣀⣤⠴⠛⠉⢿⡓⠶⣯⣭⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⣿⡟⢹⢠⡞⣡⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣻⡋⠁⠀⠙⠻⣭⣟⡒⡲ ⠀⠀⣿⠶⠾⡟⣆⢰⡄⠀⣠⠔⠋⠁⡗⠀⢀⣠⠴⠚⣉⡳⠄⠀⣠⣾⠿⠈⠙⢓ ⠀⣰⣿⠁⢀⣙⢮⡳⣥⠞⠁⠘⠄⠀⣧⣶⣋⣥⢶⣻⡭⠿⣗⣴⡋⣟⣆⣠⠾⠋ ⠀⣧⣿⠼⣿⠛⢷⣿⣾⡇⠀⢠⡏⢉⣉⣥⣖⣋⠛⠦⢤⣀⠀⠀⡽⠸⣏⡀⢠⠋ ⠀⢳⣾⠀⠈⢩⢹⣿⡿⠁⠀⠁⠸⣄⠘⢯⣉⣉⣯⣿⣳⣮⠀⠘⣇⣠⡬⣺⣏⢣ ⠀⠈⣿⠀⠐⠀⢀⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠊⠓⠄⡉⢩⣭⠿⠀⠐⠒⡉⣯⠞⣧⢸⠈ ⣤⠤⣼⡇⠀⠀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡏⠀⢠⠇⠀⠀⡏⠀⢈⣤⡼ ⢠⠞⢉⣧⠀⠀⣇⠤⣦⣄⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠁⡐⠛⠂⠀⢀⡟⣀⡾⠋⠁ ⠏⢠⡞⣿⢠⣶⣞⢷⠾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⢁⡜⠀⠀⠀⣔⣫⣾⡿⣧⠀⠀ ⢀⡟⠀⢻⣠⣿⡾⣭⣽⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡼⢡⠏⠀⠀⠀⢸⣧⡾⠋⠀⢼⡇⠀ ⢸⠁⠀⢸⡏⢣⣝⡛⠛⠻⠧⠀⠀⠀⢀⠚⠀⠋⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⢻⢳⢆⢀⣼⡇⠀ ⠸⡇⠀⠸⡇⠈⠌⠉⠙⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠍⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⠏⢿⣾⣿⣰⣿⠎⣿⠦ ⠀⢹⡄⠀⣿⢐⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠆⣀⣠⠴⠖⠛⠉⠀⠀⢀⣤⢞⣵⠃⠀⠹⣇ ⢣⡀⠙⢦⡈⠓⠮⢤⣤⣤⣤⡶⠞⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⡤⠞⠋⡤⠜⠃⠀⠀⠤⠛
January 2021

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

Text-to-Speech Playing