twitchquotes:
π YOU π IDIOTS π WILL π PASTE π ANYTHING π AS π LONG π AS π THERE π ARE π CLAP π EMOJIS π
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I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Hi I 15 year old somalian rhinoceros
twitchquotes:
hi I 15 year old somalian rhinoceros i need surgery for gud horn pls send money to my owner nigerian prince pls no pasterino my story
hi I 15 year old somalian rhinoceros i need surgery for gud horn pls send money to my owner nigerian prince pls no pasterino my story
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Reynad
Mary Wanna
twitchquotes:
hello cute pie, my name is macaroni struthers and i am here to enlighten you about the dangers of a drug called "mary wanna." it is a very dangerous drug that can kill your life! so be careful please and do not consume it 
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imaqtpie
Slap Chop commercial script
Now that I have your attention let me show you this handy new kitchen tool, the Slap Chop! Youβre going to be in a great mood all day, because youβre going be slapping your troubles away with the Slap Chop. Now, look hereβs a potato. One slap you got big chunks for stew, two slaps home fries in a second. And, look at this when you add a mushroom: the more you do it, the finer it gets you donβt have to switch any blades.
Now, you love salad -- you hate making it. You know you hate making salads -- thatβs why you donβt have any salad in your diet. Watch this one slap... salad! I love Pizza too, but once in a while get the veggies in, at least throw it on top of the pizza.
Youβre going to change your eating habits. Soup, Coleslaw, stuff we want, 5 seconds. 4 or 5 seconds, it's done. This thing, this tuna looks boring. Stop having a boring tuna, stop having a boring life. Add this tuna putting it in like this now youβre going to have a nice, tuna, salad. Look at this youβre going to have an exciting life now.
Look hereβs a hard boiled egg. One chop, you add the pickle; you add the green onion. And what you can do is mix things together add the ham and youβre going to love this. You donβt have time to make breakfast, breakfast to go.
Youβre going to love my nuts. Watch this: almonds, walnuts. Comes with a cover so you can do everything in the cover. Alright, or you can do it on the board, whatever you like. So easy, one finger, if I can do it with one finger you guys can do it with your whole hand. Kids can do it. You know what they charge at the ice cream store? A dollar for toppings at the ice cream store. Add a couple cookies if you want. So, you can make it for 10 cents. Stop throwing your money away. You know not only nuts what about fruit? Put a mango, look at that isnβt that beautiful on your ice cream.
Why Attack on Titan is a flawed anime
As a big fan of AoT, one big plothole that has always bugged me from the first episode is the exclusion of genitals. As titans are very clearly based on humans, and canonically are created from humans, why did Isayama decide to exclude Titan genitals? I am not a homo, (I have 2 girl friends) but seeing Eren transform into a titan with a 12 foot long cock as the people of Marley watch in horror would easily made this anime my favourite of all time. I think we should cancel Isayama on Twitter and get him to realise his mistake and redraw his previous chapters accurately.
Listen to me, chat. You have a problem
twitchquotes:
Listen to me, chat. You have a problem. We both know you're depressed, anxious, and unhealthy in general. You spend all day on Twitch enjoying games vicariously through others and spamming copypastas in chat. This has to stop. I'm asking you NOT to copy and paste this message, but go outside for a change. Get a new hobby. Make some friends. Turn over a new leaf. It's your only hope at this point.
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