[Copypasta] Chess is a crappy tactical turn based RPG

Chess is a crappy tactical turn based RPG developed by a bunch of monkeys. Right away you'll notice Chess has no storyline. Instead, all you notice is the the White army and the Black army are fighting each other over a battlefield. Note the "a battlefield," because Chess only has one story map. As for the actual combat, it's extremely dull. Each unit can kill another with only one hit. This means units with a real good movement ability dominate the field (more on that bellow). There aren't even any combat animations or anything that happens in combat. One unit moves on it's space and "captures" it, and the piece is removed from the game with no form of action or special effects. Yawn. Chess has shitty class balance. The Queen is flat out overpowered while your actual front line units, the Pawns. can't do shit. I think the developers were afraid that no one would use the female character so they buffed up her abilities really high but now theres no point in using any other unit. The rest of the units suck. Rooks can only move in 4 directions, same with Bishops. Boring. Also, whats up with the Knight? It has the most bizzare combat abilities of all the units. They're retardly hard to use cause they jump around like retards to move and attack. The devs should have named this unit Ninja, since Knights didn't jump around like that in real life. Worst part, is the king. You see, the devs decided that if your king gets captured, you instantly lose the game. W-T-F? This wouldn't be a problem, except that he can't move for crap. Seriously, the most important unit in the game can only move 1 space a turn? Good luck keeping him alive while every other unit in the game dances around him. Unbalanced classes, lackluster gameplay, and not to mention repetitive 1 hour+ games. Chess is not worth the time or your money. Buy Final Fantasy Tactics or Disgaea instead. 3 out of 10.
December 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Drunk at Applebees

I don’t care if there’s a microchip in the vaccine. I’d let them put a whole MacBook Pro inside of me if it meant I could get drunk at Applebees again
December 2020

WallStreetBets

With Intel Core i7, hes just getting started

twitchquotes: Think he cant clutch through a smoke while recording in full resolution and streaming the play to the world? Watch this. Think u cant get famous in a flash like become your own meme famous? Watch this. Think hes been there, done that? With Intel Core i7, hes just getting started.
twitch chat
April 2019

Clean All The Things

β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β”€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β”€β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β”€β”€β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–„β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–„β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β–„β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β–„β–€β”€β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–€β–€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆ β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆ β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–€β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–Œ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–Œ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–Œ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–Œ ──────────▄▀▀▀▀▀▀▄ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β–€β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–Œ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆ β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–Œ β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–€β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ
September 2021

You are currently in a 25 year coma

twitchquotes: If you are reading this message, Jesse, you are currently in a 25 year coma. We've been trying to communicate with you for the longest time by manipulating your brain waves, but nothing so far has worked. If you manage to read this it means our new method has succeeded. Please, wake up Jesse. Your family loves you and wants you back. In a week they are going to pull the plug on your life support, they can't afford the medical bills anymore.
twitch chat
August 2017
Sneaky

Now we are Robot Operated - Omnic Crisis

twitchquotes: MrDestructoid Genji Outdated MrDestructoid Ana Overrated MrDestructoid Tanks Downgraded MrDestructoid Now we are Robot Operated
twitch chat
March 2017

Overwatch

Text-to-Speech Playing