twitchquotes:
If my Bitcoin💲💰 and my girl😍👰 both drowning😱🌊 and I could only save one😤😬 Catch me HODL'ing at my girls funeral😔👻🌹 Cuz its To The Moon or Nothing, kiddo 💰💯🔥😎📈💲
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What happened to this ad? :(
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Flex your Dongers for Harambe
twitchquotes:
ᕦ༼༎ຶ_༎ຶ༽ᕗ Flex your Dongers for Harambe! ᕦ༼༎ຶ_༎ຶ༽ᕗᕦ༼༎ຶ_༎ຶ༽ᕗ Flex your Dongers for Harambe! ᕦ༼༎ຶ_༎ຶ༽ᕗ
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Harambe
I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today
I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my übernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
Chad Chat Bubble
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⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢐⣌⢖⣰⠊⠁⢸⣿⡟⠈⠀⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⡄⢰⢺
⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⢴⢖⣠⣣⣴⣿⢿⡇⣈⠐⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⢠⣸
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BBoomer
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⠄⠄⠄⢰⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃
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⠄⠄⠄⡼⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⢩⢻⣛⡛⠛⢛⣉⣉⣭⡭⡈⠁⢠⠃⠄⠄
⠄⠄⢸⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⠏⠄⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠄⢀⡬⠚⠁⠄⠄⠄
⠄⢀⡞⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄⢀⢀⠄⢐⣒⣲⣴⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⢠⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠙⣯⣶⠗⠟⠙⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
What the heck did you just flipping say about me, you big meanie?
What the heck did you just flipping say about me, you big meanie? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Tiny Tots Program, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on the girl's bathroom, and I have over 300 confirmed noogies. I am trained in Nerf warfare and I have the most gold stars in the entire kindergarten class. You are nothing to me but just another butthead. I will beat you the heck up with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my dang words. You think you can get away with saying that baloney to me on the glowy type-box? Think again, doodiehead. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of teachers across the USA and your parents are being called to pick you up right now so you better prepare for the spanking, junior. The spanking that wipes out the dumb little thing you call your playtime. You're in big darn trouble, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can wedgie you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed fartfights, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States PTA and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your dorky bottom off the face of the playground, you little poopypants. If only you could have known what serious punishments your little "smartypants" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your goshdarned tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you silly doofus. I will spray boogers all over you and you will cry about it. You're frickin grounded, buttmunch...