twitchquotes:
My son π¦π» can be homer sexual π³οΈβπ My daughter π§π» can be lebanese π But I will NEVER βΌοΈ Raise a child πΆπ» who likes Jake and Logan Paul π
π»β
twitch chat
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Comedy God has entered the building: Attack Helicopter
I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter
WEE WOO WEE WOO
ALERT! COMEDY GOD HAS ENTERED THE BUILDING! GET TO COVER!
steps on stage
Bystander: "Oh god! Don't do it! I have a family!"
Comedy God: "Heh..."
adjusts fedora
the building is filled with fear and anticipation
God and Jesus himself looks on in suspense
comedy god clears throat
everything is completely quiet not a single sound is heard
world leaders look and wait with dread
everything in the world stops
nothing is happening
comedy god smirks
no one is prepared for what is going to happen
comedy god musters all of this power
he bellows out to the world
"ATTACK"
absolute suspense
everyone is filled with overwhelming dread
"HELICOPTER"
all at once, absolute pandemonium commences
all nuclear powers launch their nukes at once
giant brawls start
43 wars are declared simultaneously
a shockwave travels around the earth
earth is driven into chaos
humanity is regressed back to the stone age
the pure funny of that joke destroyed civilization itself
all the while people are laughing harder than they ever did
people who aren't killed die from laughter
literally the funniest joke in the world
then the comedy god himself posts his creation to reddit and gets karma
Classic
Just me and EA hanging out
twitchquotes:
Just me and π°πEAππ°, hanging out I wanted some Star Warsπ so I started to pout π He asked if I was down β¬for something yummy ππ and I asked what and he said he'd give me his π°π¦looties!π¦π° Yeah! Yeah!ππ¦ I earn them!π¦ I buy them!π¦ I purchase them wholeπ¦π° π It makes π°πEAππ° πhappyπ so it's my only goal... ππ¦π«Harder EA! Harder EA! π«π¦π 1 lootieπ¦, 2 lootieπ¦π¦, 3 lootieπ¦π¦π¦, 4π¦π¦π¦π¦ I'm π°πEA'sππ° πDisney princess πbut I'm also a consumer whore! π He makes me OPπ!He makes me feel goodπ! πππHe makes me feel everything a whale should!~ πππ ππ¦πWa-What!ππ¦πο»Ώ
twitch chat
Please remove Leifman's mod status
twitchquotes:
Dear Kripp, it has come to my attention that one of your mods "Leifman" has been abusing his authority as mod and banning people for no good reason. I would appreciate if you took some time out of your schedule to take action and remove his mod status. Thank you!
twitch chat
Kripp
My blood pumpulates at incredibly capacities
twitchquotes:
In greece, Kripparrian has risening from his antiwoke. As the Kripparrian plays cardstone, my blood pumpulates at incredibly capacities. For Kripparrian wins 50 cardstone. From a statistically standingpoint this is without precidenting! A hugely kilometerstone!
twitch chat
Kripp
Nairo Meta Whore
twitchquotes:
NairoMK? more like Nairo Meta Whore (whore with a silent K). all you do is play the most broken characters because they are "meta" what the crap even is the meta. i miss when you used to be loyal to your characters like Zero. Zero is a HARDCORE final fantasy fan and played cloud in tournament despite the nerfs to his favorite character. enjoy your cheap wins until the next patch hits and nerfs your busted characters. us character loyalists will gladly take your top seed. Lucas main BTW.
twitch chat
NairoMK