[Copypasta] As Jeff Kaplan stares at me through my computer screen

twitchquotes: As Jeff Kaplan stares at me through my computer screen, I begin to contemplate reality. What truly has substance in this realm of technology, avarice and sin? What is our future, if not a blank, hollow nothing, rife with silence and strife? PogChamp
twitch chat
January 2018

Overwatch

I used to be a real ad
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You guys are so rude. First Jake now Sinatraa

twitchquotes: You guys are so rude. First Jake now Sinatraa. Iโ€™m so disappointed. I look up to both of them and hope one day to get to get out of silver. If anything this is an extremely bronze, disgusting chat.
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March 2018
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No one else plays healer, only me

twitchquotes: i am a mercy player, and you should be THANKFUL i managed to bless your game. no one else plays healer, only me, and you DARE complain about the way I play? this entire community is TOXIC and ruins the competitive experience for us mercy players
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June 2017

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I sexually Identify as a Bastion

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as a Bastion. Ever since I was a transistor I dreamed of being nanoboosted and firing cannonballs on the disgusting enemy team. People tell me that being a Siege Automaton is impossible but I don't care, I'm overpowered. Iโ€™m having a plastic surgeon install treads, a gattling gun and a nanoboost on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me BOOSTED and respect my right to take 35% less damage 100% of the time. If not, you're an omnic-phobe and need to check your human privileges
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March 2017

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I sexually Identify as

GOATS ults ResidentSleeper

twitchquotes: FIRE AT WILL ResidentSleeper NERF THIS! ResidentSleeper EXPERIENCE TRANQUILITY ResidentSleeper HAMMER DOWN ResidentSleeper RALLY TO ME! ResidentSleeper OH LETS BREAK IT DOWN
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March 2019

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Did you ever hear the tragedy of xQc?

twitchquotes: Did you ever hear the tragedy of xQc? I thought not. It's not a story the OWL casters would tell you. It's a tank legend. xQc was a tank main, so powerful and so wise he could use his shield to influence the DPS to do their jobs.. He had such a knowledge of the shields that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The tank mains of the game is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful... the only thing he was afraid of was getting banned for toxicity, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice reported him to blizzard in his sleep. It's ironic he could save others from death, but not himself.
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May 2019
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Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise

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