[Copypasta] As Jeff Kaplan stares at me through my computer screen

twitchquotes: As Jeff Kaplan stares at me through my computer screen, I begin to contemplate reality. What truly has substance in this realm of technology, avarice and sin? What is our future, if not a blank, hollow nothing, rife with silence and strife? PogChamp
twitch chat
January 2018

Overwatch

I used to be a real ad
More Overwatch Copypastas

Overwatch professional player xGodSlayerx

twitchquotes: We are gathered here today in memorium of the Overwatch professional player xGodSlayerx. In life, he demanded healing and better teammates who were not bitch idiot noob feeders. In death, he is an icon of Genji players everywhere. His legacy of epic zero-kill dragonblades and Blizzcon-worthy shuriken throwing skills have inspired a generation of one-trick DPS players in Masters and below. Perhaps what he needed was not heal bitch, or shield bitch, but a feel bitch.
twitch chat
June 2017
MOONMOON

Overwatch

Ameng meets Bumper in a hallway

twitchquotes: Bumper broke into a cold sweat. There he was across the hallway, a man whose name that brought chills down his spine. Bumper looked down, hoping to avoid direct eye contact. "A-ameng," Bumper stuttered. "What up, virgin" Ameng boomed. Bumper braced himself but it was too late. Ameng's 5000 tonne shoulder slammed into his, the movement causing air waves across the room. Bumper flew back and the concrete wall chipped around him. His shoulder was definitely broken. "Later, nerd." Ameng chuckled.
twitch chat
March 2019
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

God I wish Winston was real

twitchquotes: God I wish Winston was real. I want him to sit on my face with his furry ass. I want him to yell "THE POWER OF SCIENCE" as he thrusts into me. I want him to spam "OH YEAH" when we're finished. God if Blizzard made life-sized cutouts of Winston I would buy them all for myself and keep them in my basement for my pleasure. God I wish Winston was real.
twitch chat
March 2018

Overwatch

I want Zarya's giant feet to squash my face

twitchquotes: I want Zarya's giant feet to squash my face and suffocate me and gives me no mercy, I want her to squash my head with her gigantic thighs like a hand squashes a tomato. Just knowing that she is able to do that brings me to the brink of orgasmic relief, but I know she won't smash my body with her arms hugging me like the bear emote. Fuck, why does she have to be a video game character, I want Blizzard to make sex dolls, I would buy out all the Zarya models and keep them for myself
twitch chat
June 2017

Overwatch

My favorite character is the reaper guy

twitchquotes: My favorite character is the reaper guy. he is very powerfull. special move, honestly is one of the best in the game and so he comes equipped with these two revolvers and only takes about 3 or 4 shots to actually execute a kill so it comes really in handy specially when you come from the side.
twitch chat
October 2020

Overwatch

Text-to-Speech Playing