[Copypasta] Just me and EA hanging out

twitchquotes: Just me and πŸ’°πŸ’•EAπŸ’•πŸ’°, hanging out I wanted some Star Wars🌟 so I started to pout 😞 He asked if I was down ⬇for something yummy πŸ˜πŸ† and I asked what and he said he'd give me his πŸ’°πŸ’¦looties!πŸ’¦πŸ’° Yeah! Yeah!πŸ’•πŸ’¦ I earn them!πŸ’¦ I buy them!πŸ’¦ I purchase them wholeπŸ’¦πŸ’° 😍 It makes πŸ’°πŸ’˜EAπŸ’˜πŸ’° 😊happy😊 so it's my only goal... πŸ’•πŸ’¦πŸ˜«Harder EA! Harder EA! πŸ˜«πŸ’¦πŸ’• 1 lootieπŸ’¦, 2 lootieπŸ’¦πŸ’¦, 3 lootieπŸ’¦πŸ’¦πŸ’¦, 4πŸ’¦πŸ’¦πŸ’¦πŸ’¦ I'm πŸ’°πŸ’˜EA'sπŸ’˜πŸ’° πŸ‘‘Disney princess πŸ‘‘but I'm also a consumer whore! πŸ’Ÿ He makes me OPπŸ’—!He makes me feel goodπŸ’œ! πŸ’˜πŸ’˜πŸ’˜He makes me feel everything a whale should!~ πŸ’˜πŸ’˜πŸ’˜ πŸ‘‘πŸ’¦πŸ’˜Wa-What!πŸ’˜πŸ’¦πŸ‘‘ο»Ώ
twitch chat
November 2017
I used to be a real ad
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I want to bang the Minecraft Ender Dragon

March 2021

NSFW

Blizzard responds to blitzchung ban

twitchquotes: The πŸ’° specific πŸ’° views πŸ’° expressed πŸ’° by πŸ’° blitzchung πŸ’° were πŸ’° NOT πŸ’° a πŸ’° factor πŸ’° in πŸ’° the πŸ’° decisionπŸ’° weπŸ’° made.πŸ’° I πŸ’° want πŸ’° to πŸ’° be πŸ’° clear: πŸ’° our πŸ’° relationships πŸ’° in China πŸ’° had πŸ’° noπŸ’° influence πŸ’° on πŸ’° our πŸ’° decision.πŸ’°
twitch chat
October 2019

Hearthstone

McDonald's BTS Meal

So I was listening to my favorite boy band called 'BTS (I am an army)' on my Samsung earbuds (BTS Edition) using my Samsung Galaxy s20+ (BTS Edition) in my room plastered with BTS poster. Suddenly one of my Army friends (we are BTSSexual and BTSGender) told me that there is a McDonald's BTS meal which almost made me jizz my pants. I ran to McDonald's to buy the BTS meal and came back home. Even though I am an Army (I would have bought their feces if they were selling it), this is intolerable. That was the most uncreative meal ever created. I wish McDonald's would have put Ass-Hair of each members of the band and hidden it in Chicken McNuggets. Like "Hey! I got Jimins Ass-hair in my chicken nuggets! Can't wait to get Kim Teahyung's Ass-hair so I can take his DNA sample and recreate a clone of Kim Teahyung to overrule the world with #Army". bts #army #blm #gaypride #arianagrande
June 2021

Idk what it is with you guys but you keep upvoting anything with the word cum sex or dick in it

Idk what it is with you guys but you keep upvoting anything with the word cum sex or dick in it. I came here for subtle wall of texts where you couldn’t tell if it was real or fake. Now these 10k upvoted cumshit copypastas are just upvoted, never pasted. You don’t actually see any of them in the wild it’s a truly sad state. See for yourself sort by top this year and it’s all sex like fr is it that funny?
September 2021

TIFU: By slapping my wife’s ass

TIFU: By slapping my wife’s ass Last night my wife and I were getting hot and heavy, and began having sex. During sex, I decided to put in a little spanking. This is where things got weird. As I slapped her ass in the heat of the moment, she bursts out with β€œyes daddy, spank me harder!” (To preface I knew she had some serious daddy issues)This initially was a turn on, but after a few seconds all I could think of was disciplining my daughter and my face went sour. I stopped immediately and felt awkward. She responded with β€œwhat’s wrong daddy, did you not punish me enough?” I walked out of the room and told her I needed a minute. Now I don’t think I can ever have sex again. TL;DR slapped my wife’s ass, called me daddy, now I can only think about disciplining my daughter and don’t know if I can ever have sex again
July 2022
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