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I hate spam, its so overrated. Thank you mods for keeping our chat experience so pristine and enjoyable! 
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I used to be a real ad
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I used to work at an abortion clinic
I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed:
• A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight
• A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor
• They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name)
• One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns
• The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man
• The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life"
• The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos
• The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy)
• During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
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Kripp's older videos
twitchquotes:
Kripp, I was on your channel earlier and one of your older videos caught my eye. It was you and Krippi beating inferno hardcore Diablo. Now that was intense. Over 15 minutes of pure battle and you didnt let up for a second. Now I have to ask, how did you fall from grace? All these intense world firsts under your belt and now you just play a childrens card game and peddle mobile games. Its like seeing a hero from your childhood being stuck in a retirement home.
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Kripp
This is Noah Legerino, CEO of Never Legend Incorporated
twitchquotes:
Hello Kripparino, this is Noah Legerino, CEO of Never Legend Incorporated©. As you may already know, we are requiring you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp (has legend) as you no longer are a "never legend". This was stated in the contract you signed under section 6 article 9 paragraph 420. This is to be enforced immediately.
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Kripp
you are now manually breathing
twitchquotes:
you are now manually breathing you are now manually blinking you are aware that your tongue cannot find a comfy place in your mouth you are aware of all the itches on your body that need to be scratched
you are now manually breathing you are now manually blinking you are aware that your tongue cannot find a comfy place in your mouth you are aware of all the itches on your body that need to be scratched
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C9 TAKE MY ENERGY
twitchquotes:
C9 TAKE MY ENERGY 
C9 TAKE MY ENERGY
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Riot Games