[Copypasta] Tired of getting Sniped?

twitchquotes: Tired of getting Sniped? No problem! Here at Sniper Deflectors™ we can shield your Arena Queue from incoming Snipers with our new patent-pending SniperShield™ Technology! Our shield will bounce incoming sniper shots right back to the sniper-guild recruiter (definitely not DRIVEZY), causing them to effectively Snipe themselves! Buy 24/7 protection now for only $24.99/month!
twitch chat
August 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

I used to be a real ad
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Kripp subscribes to life

twitchquotes: Ｉ　ｕｎｓｕｂｓｃｒｉｂｅｄ　ｆｒｏｍ　ｌｉｆｅ　ｔｏ　ｗａｔｃｈ　Ｋｒｉｐｐａｒｉａｎ，　ｄｅｖｏｔｅｄ　ａｎｄ　ｓｕｂｓｃｒｉｂｅｄ　ｍｙｓｅｌｆ　ｔｏ　ｈｉｍ，　ｈｉｓ　ｃｈａｎｎｅｌ；　ｈｏｗ　ａｍ　Ｉ　ｒｅｐａｉｄ？　Ｋｒｉｐｐ　ｂｅｔｒａｙｓ　ｍｅ，　ｓｕｂｓｃｒｉｂｉｎｇ　ｈｉｍｓｅｌｆ　ｔｏ　ＬＩＦＥ！　i’ｍ　ｓｏｒｒｙ　Ｋｒｉｐｐ，　ｂｕｔ　ＴＨＩＳ　ＭＯＮＴＨ　ｙｏｕ　ａｒｅｎ’ｔ　ｇｅｔｔｉｎｇ　ｙｏｕｒ　ｄｏｎｇｅｒｓ，　ＵＮＳＵＢＢＥＤ．
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Hi Kripp, Google again here

twitchquotes: Kripp, Google again here. We've noticed that you've been away from Twitch for at least 2 minutes in the past. We're just wondering if everything is okay. Is it still the merchandise? We're serious about raising the price if it's a problem to you. We just want you to have fun, and to of course buy more Twitch merchandise. Our Viewbots are ready to bring you (mostly us) much ad revenue. Thank you Kripp, hope to see you soon
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Viewbots

Officer Dongerino of the Blizzard PD

twitchquotes: Kripp, This is Officer Dongerino of the Blizzard PD. We need to question you about adjusting your Windows Clock to get ahead on opening Packs. If any of you copy and paste this, you will be subject to banning from Blizzard games forever. Come with me, Kripp
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

lethal

twitchquotes: Amaz moans hard as Kripp gropes his smallish package. “Pepperoni” Kripp whispered into Amaz’s elvish ear, as they started making out. “Do…do I win?” Amaz says tentatively, as Kripp slowly tugs away his pants. “Your deck is crazy” Kripp says, as he flips Amaz on his back. “It’s lethal guys” Amaz says playfully, as he presents his Twisting Nether.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

KappaPride

Kripp saved my marriage

twitchquotes: I was going through a rough time in my marriage where nothing seemed to arouse me anymore. Things had gone stale between me and my wife in bed and divorce seemed inevitable. But then I discovered Kripp's stream and everything changed. There's just something about that vegan bald head that does something to me, and before I knew it my libido was back. I now go at it with my wife at the sounds of "Fuck!" and "Topdeck Flamestrike!" to boost my vigor. Thank you Kripp for saving my marriage.
twitch chat
November 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

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