[Copypasta] 98% of memes aren't even remotely funny

twitchquotes: Did πŸ‘ You πŸ‘ˆ Know? πŸ’­ 98% of πŸ’¦ memes 🐸 aren't 🚫 even πŸŒƒ remotely funny, πŸ˜„ but πŸ‘ rather πŸ‘‰ an πŸ‘Ή indication of πŸ’¦ the πŸ‘ low πŸ“‰ intelligence, absence of πŸ’¦ empathy, and πŸ‘ devolution of πŸ’¦ modern πŸ–₯ man. πŸ‘¨
twitch chat
July 2017
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Maximus Kappacus Spamicus, commander of the Twitch Armies

twitchquotes: <:::::[]=Β€ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½οΎ‰ My name is Maximus Kappacus Spamicus, commander of the Armies of the Twitch, General of the PJSalt Legions, loyal servant to the true Emperor Kripparrian. Father to a banned son, and husband to a banned wife. I will slay all moderinos, whether in this chat or the next. <:::::[]=Β€ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½οΎ‰
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

MODS

salty

Hey Kripp, Dan from HearthArena here

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, Dan from HearthArena here. Just wanted to let you know we have some updates to our policy for sponsored content. Instead of saying "that guy's deck was crazy", we now suggest our partners use the phrase, "wow, that guy must have used HearthArenaβ„’ to get a deck like that!" We're grateful for your continued participation and hope you have a nice day.
twitch chat
September 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

salty

First time I got smash 4 and tried it

twitchquotes: First time I got smash 4 and tried it, after having played Fox-only on Final Destination for years in Melee, I was so disappointed. I couldn't Doowop an Skippity Uppity Airslap into a Wavedashed Cockdump Sparklenut. You aren't even allowed to Spitshine a ledge canceled Dickknob after twirlywhirly dibbidybobbidyboo 2: Electric Boogaloo. Fucking inexcusable. I really hope Sakurai dies so the series can see its full potential.
twitch chat
November 2018

Super Smash Bros

AITA for not showing up to my own funeral?

So I (74M) was recently hit by a car (2014 Honda) and died. My wife (5F) organized me a funeral (cost $2747) without asking me (74M) at all. I (74M) was unable to make it because I (74M) was dead (17 days). At the funeral I heard my dad (15M) and other family members talking about how they wish I could be there and now I feel bad for not showing up. AITA?
August 2021

AITA

Kirby with gun

β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ ────────────▄▀░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–‘ β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–‘ β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–’β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘ β–„β–’β–€β–€β–€β–’β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–€β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–’β–€β–€β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–„β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘ β”€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–“β–“β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–„β–€β–€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–“β–“β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–ˆβ–„β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β”€β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
October 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing