[Copypasta] Long ago in a distant land, I, Aku

twitchquotes: Long ago in a distant land, I, Aku, the shapeshifting Master of Darkness, unleashed an unspeakable evil! But a foolish Samurai warrior, wielding a magic sword, stepped forth to oppose me. Before the final blow was struck, I tore open a portal in time and flung him into the future, where my evil is law! Now the fool seeks to return to the past, and undo the future that is Aku!
twitch chat
June 2017
I used to be a real ad
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Dex is Kripp's opponent

twitchquotes: "My apologies" Kripp's opponent emotes as he casts fireball on Kripp, ending Kripps arena run. "That guy was so lucky! He curved out every turn, had every answer and topdecked lethal!" Kripp sighs and loads up another arena run. His opponent closes his laptop and thinks "What a scrub. And now for the cherry on top" as his opponent walks out from the other room goes up to Kripp and licks Kripp's arm. "Good doggie" Kripp says "Here's a treat for a good doggie".
twitch chat
October 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Giving due respect to the chat moderators

twitchquotes: Hey mods I just wanted to congratulate you all and give proper respect for keeping our chats safe from the evils of Twitch, the spammers, and sexual predators. Without you and your methods, which have no affiliation to the leading German political party within the time frame of World War 2, we would not be able to enjoy a fun, clean environment in which we can enrich ourselves with game knowledge and truly become one as a great family for the greater good of internet chatrooms. Again, I would like to say you have done a wonderful job and hope to see you all keep up the great work.
twitch chat
December 2014

MODS

Classic

Chinese characters wave

twitchquotes: 厂下广卞廿十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十廿卞广下厂厂下广卞廿十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十廿卞广下厂厂下广卞廿十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十廿卞广下厂厂下广卞廿十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十廿卞广下厂厂下广卞廿十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十廿卞广下厂厂下广卞廿十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十廿卞广下厂厂下广卞廿十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十廿卞广下厂厂下广卞廿十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十廿卞广下厂厂下广卞廿十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十廿卞广下厂厂下广卞廿十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十廿卞广下厂厂下广卞廿十一卉半
twitch chat
May 2020

So I’m an AMC shareholder

So I’m an AMC shareholder, which means I own some of the business. Because the stock kept getting halted today I decided to go to my local AMC and support the stock by buying some concessions. I went up to the stand and told the casher (his nametag said Melvin) that I was a shareholder and wanted to support the business. He looked excited and told me to close my eyes and hold out my hand for a surprise shareholder treat. I can’t believe it, but he just covered my hands in liquid butter! Now I’m typing this at home and cant get it off my hands, and my keyboard is all greasy typing this, What do I do?
January 2021

WallStreetBets

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