[Copypasta] Do you have what it takes to be a Memester?

slow claps steps out of the shadows Heh... not bad, kid. Not bad at all. Your meme, I mean. It's not bad. A good first attempt. It's plenty dank... I can tell it's got some thought behind it... lots of quotable material... But memeing isn't all sunshine and rainbows, kid. You're skilled... that much I can tell. But do you have what it takes to be a Memester? To join those esteemed meme ranks? To call yourself a member of the Ruseman's Corps? Memeing takes talent, that much is true. But more than that it takes heart. The world-class Memesters - I mean the big guys, like Johnny Hammersticks and Billy Kuahana - they're out there day and night, burning the midnight meme-oil, working tirelessly to craft that next big meme. And you know what, kid? 99 times out of a hundred, that new meme fails. Someone dismisses it as bait, or says it's "tryhard," or ignores it as they copy/paste the latest shitpost copypasta dreamt up by those sorry excuses for cut-rate memers over at reddit. The Meme Game is rough, kid, and I don't just mean the one you just lost :). It's a rough business, and for every artisan meme you craft in your meme bakery, some cocksucker at 9gag has a picture of a duck or some shit that a million different Johnny No-Names will attach a milion different captions to. Chin up, kid. Don't get all mopey on me. You've got skill. You've got talent. You just need to show your drive. See you on the boards...
June 2017
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

You didn't ask? (response to Who Asked?)

You didn't ask? That's amazing, are you a dictator? A god? The most important person in the world? No? Then why would you say that like it matters? "I come out as a homosexual, this is really hard for me and I hope you respect that." "Did I ask?" no, you did not ask, we couldn't care less if you asked, you are nothing compared to the universe. Do you think your opinion holds a higher meaning than anyone else's? You could've said anything, something creative, even an ok or you not saying a word would be better than the phrase "Did I ask?" we get it, you never asked, but did anyone ask about you asking? Even if you said that you traveled the world to find out who asked, who asked you to do that? You didn't ask for their opinion, but nobody asked if you care at all. You aren't creative or smart. Even a caveman grunts and ooga boogas would be better than that phrase. Now stop pretending to be a god and go back to school to learn how to respect people
November 2021

Who Asked?

TIFU: By slapping my wife’s ass

TIFU: By slapping my wife’s ass Last night my wife and I were getting hot and heavy, and began having sex. During sex, I decided to put in a little spanking. This is where things got weird. As I slapped her ass in the heat of the moment, she bursts out with “yes daddy, spank me harder!” (To preface I knew she had some serious daddy issues)This initially was a turn on, but after a few seconds all I could think of was disciplining my daughter and my face went sour. I stopped immediately and felt awkward. She responded with “what’s wrong daddy, did you not punish me enough?” I walked out of the room and told her I needed a minute. Now I don’t think I can ever have sex again. TL;DR slapped my wife’s ass, called me daddy, now I can only think about disciplining my daughter and don’t know if I can ever have sex again
July 2022

moon2WOW

⣿⣿⣿⠛⠉⢀⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⠷⠄⠄⠄⢘⣲⣄⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠛⠁⠄⢸⣿⣿⡿⣋⣤⠤⠄⠄⣀⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣅⡀⠹⣿⣿ ⠇⠄⠌⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣁⣴⣾⣿⣿⠟⡛⠛⢿⣆⢸⣿⣿⣿⠫⠄⠈⢻⠄⢹⣿ ⠄⠘⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠅⢀⣼⡿⠘⢿⣿⣿⣷⣥⣴⡿⠄⢸⣿ ⠄⠃⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⡙⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠋⠁⣠⡀⠠⠭⠭⠭⢥⣤⠄⢸⣿ ⢸⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⣛⠒⠒⠒⢂⣁⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿ ⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠉⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿ ⡏⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢻⣿⣿⠃⢀⣿ ⡇⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿ ⡇⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠄⠹⣶⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠛⢿⠄⢸⣿ ⠃⠠⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⢰⣿⣿⣧⠄⡀⠄⢀⣠⣶⣿⠗⠄⢀⣾⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠈⣿⣿⠃⠄⣩⣴⣿⣿⣿⣃⣤⣶⠄⢹⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢠⣿⣧⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣋⡀⠘⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠁⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠄⠻ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⡖
July 2021
MOONMOON

Babbling book is quickly becoming one of my favorite cards

twitchquotes: Babbling book is quickly becoming one of my favorite cards. It's just so positive and generous. Practically costs nothing at all at one mana you drop him on the board and that chill ass mofo gives you a spell to use later in the game. And you also get this adorable little 1/1 can ping things but usually is too harmless to be removed. But more than the BB is just so positive. It comes on the board like "do you want to cast a spell?" and I'm like "yeah BB i do want to cast a spell let's do this shit" and when he attacks he's like "SPELLS ARE FUN" and I'm like "yeah they are SO FUN." He doesn't say some bullshit macho shit like "I will destroy you" he's just like "nah spells are fun." And it looks so happy. I mean this is an inanimate object literally brought to life by magic. It understands it's life is a temporary magical gift and the dude is just fucking loving it. I mean look at his face he's just so happy. I am literally never sad when babbling book is on board. IDK if he's gonna make it into the metagame or not but for now he (or she) a pretty chill card
twitch chat
December 2016

Classic

Hearthstone

Hello this is Dan from the next room over

twitchquotes: Hello this is Dan from the next room over. Can you be quiet for 2 minutes it's almost 2am and I can still hear you. I have had a hard day doing REAL work for 13 hours and all I want is a bit of peace and quiet. LOL just kidding it's Tanner from highschool again, enjoy playing your kids games while I'm hanging out with Becca. We're watching re-runs of that time you lost that video game tournament. Peace out!
twitch chat
June 2019

Tanner from High School

Text-to-Speech Playing