[Copypasta] Do you have what it takes to be a Memester?

slow claps steps out of the shadows Heh... not bad, kid. Not bad at all. Your meme, I mean. It's not bad. A good first attempt. It's plenty dank... I can tell it's got some thought behind it... lots of quotable material... But memeing isn't all sunshine and rainbows, kid. You're skilled... that much I can tell. But do you have what it takes to be a Memester? To join those esteemed meme ranks? To call yourself a member of the Ruseman's Corps? Memeing takes talent, that much is true. But more than that it takes heart. The world-class Memesters - I mean the big guys, like Johnny Hammersticks and Billy Kuahana - they're out there day and night, burning the midnight meme-oil, working tirelessly to craft that next big meme. And you know what, kid? 99 times out of a hundred, that new meme fails. Someone dismisses it as bait, or says it's "tryhard," or ignores it as they copy/paste the latest shitpost copypasta dreamt up by those sorry excuses for cut-rate memers over at reddit. The Meme Game is rough, kid, and I don't just mean the one you just lost :). It's a rough business, and for every artisan meme you craft in your meme bakery, some cocksucker at 9gag has a picture of a duck or some shit that a million different Johnny No-Names will attach a milion different captions to. Chin up, kid. Don't get all mopey on me. You've got skill. You've got talent. You just need to show your drive. See you on the boards...
June 2017
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

have you ever had a dream like this?

have you πŸ‘‰πŸΏ ever 😠 had a dreams πŸ˜΄πŸ’­- thats βœ”- that you πŸ‘‰πŸ»πŸ‘€ uhm 😀 you πŸ‘ˆ had you πŸ‘ˆ- you πŸ‘ˆ could- you πŸ‘ˆ do what you πŸ‘‰ want 😍- you πŸ‘ˆ could do- so you πŸ‘ˆπŸ‘¦- you πŸ‘ˆ do- you πŸ‘ˆ could do you πŸ€–πŸ‘ˆ- you πŸ‘ΈπŸ‘‰ wan πŸ”‘- you πŸ‘ΈπŸ‘‰ want πŸ˜‹ him πŸ‘΄ to do so much πŸ”₯ that you πŸ‘‰ could do anything πŸ’°?
April 2021

Emoji Pasta

To be fair, you need a very high IQ to understand The Bible

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Bible. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Jesus’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike The Bible truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in God’s existential catchphrase "Never trust anyone completely but God." which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as King James's genius wit unfolds itself on the pages. What fools.. how I pity them. πŸ˜‚ And yes by the way, I DO have a Bible tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
August 2021

All these flavours, and he chose to be salty

twitchquotes: PJSalt All these flavours, and he chose to be salty. PJSalt
twitch chat
August 2015
Reynad

salty

I have not been gifted a single sub

twitchquotes: Hey streamer, i just wanted to express my disappointment in your community with this message. I have been a active viewer for the past couple of years and despite my constant effort i have not been gifted a single sub by your community. You should really be ashamed.
twitch chat
July 2020

Donkey Kong

β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–’β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€ β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ”€β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€ β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–Œβ–‘β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–β–β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β”€β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–β–β”€β”€β–„β–„β”€β–ˆβ”€β–„β–„β”€β”€β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–β–β–„β”€β–€β–€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–€β–€β”€β–„β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β”€β–€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–„β–ˆ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€ β”€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β”€ β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
September 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing