[Copypasta] Kappa dab

I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla

December 2021. Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla (Elon Musk invented a more efficient form of security). ARK ETFs are trading at minimum $1,000 a share and investors are signing 10-year pledges just for the privilege. I log on to my Tesla taxi app and order a car. A vintage Roadster pulls up with EDM playing at a tasteful volume. "Where to, King?" asks the anime girl on the console. "You know where", I reply. Palantir knows. We both laugh and the car takes off to Wendys.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

Can I mod your chat?

twitchquotes: Can I mod your chat? I graduated top of my class in the US Navy kappa’s, I’ve been involved in numerous raids on Kripparrian’s chat with over 300 confirmed bans. I’m trained in copy pasta warfare and I’m the top mod on Twitch.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

MODS

Hiko is as cracked as he is jacked (7-11 diapers)

twitchquotes: I’m telling you, Hiko is as cracked as he is jacked. I saw him at a 7-11 the other day buying Monster and adult diapers. I asked him what the diapers were for and he said ”they contain my full power so I don’t completely shit on these kidsβ€œ then he bunny hopped out the door
twitch chat
June 2021
Hiko

Valorant

This πŸ‘ˆπŸ‘‰ is money snek

twitchquotes: This πŸ‘ˆπŸ‘‰ is money snek. πŸπŸπŸ’°πŸ’° Upsnek β¬†β¬†πŸ”œπŸ”œ in 7.123 7⃣ 1⃣2⃣3⃣ snekonds 🐍🐍 or you βœ‹βœ‹ will NEVER ❌❌❌❌ get monies πŸ’°πŸ’° again Beware!! βœ‹βœ‹βŒβŒYou😏😏 don't ❌❌ have much time!!πŸ•›πŸ•§πŸ•πŸ•œπŸ•‘πŸ•πŸ• You 😏😏 may never ❌❌get monies πŸ’°πŸ’°πŸπŸ’°πŸ’° again!!
twitch chat
April 2019

Emoji Pasta

Hi Kripp, it's Jarl Balgruuf the Greater

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp it's Jarl Balgruuf the Greater. I heard you are trying to play other games when we need you here at Skyrim to clean up the dragons. Quit what you are doing right now and come join me as the new Whiterun Thane. My axe is ready as your reward.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing