twitchquotes:
THAT MOMENT WHEN YOU REALIZE THAT YOUR ONLY FRIEND IS TWITCH CHAT
THAT MOMENT WHEN YOU REALIZE THAT YOUR ONLY FRIEND IS TWITCH CHAT
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More Copypastas
Shame on you guys,copying and pasting like sheeps
twitchquotes:
Is this seriuous,human race?This is what we have become?Shame on you guys,copying and pasting like sheeps,do you even read what are you copying,God have mercy on these poor souls,they know not what they do...
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imaqtpie
I dream of becoming a carrot
twitchquotes:
I dream of becoming a carrot. When I'm home alone I dig holes in the backyard and stand in them, put lettuce on top of my head from sun up to sun down. I would steal sun tan spray from stores and use it until I turned a bright orange. People tell me it's impossible for me to be a carrot but I know I can be anything I want to be.
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Classic
Darude Sandstorm
twitchquotes:
DUDUDUDUDUDUU
DUDUDUDUDUDUU
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Reynad
Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub
Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
Shit and cum at the same time (from /r/nofap)
Okay I just had the weirdest thing happen to me on my day 2 of no fap, I was taking a shit and struggling to push it out and simultaneously I kid you not I randomly ejaculate as I push my shit out, I’m just sitting there dumbfounded as to why the fuck this happened, there was no pleasure to my shit, nothing strange I wasn’t fapping I swear to god I just randomly….. ejaculated while shitting. WHAT THE FUCK? Anyways mission failed life really hates me lmao