[Copypasta] Impossible to be happy and sad at the same time

twitchquotes: haHAA they say it's impossible to be happy & sad at the same time haHAA My wife told me i have the biggest d*ck out of all my brothers haHAA
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October 2016
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Brazilian No. 1 Futbol Player Eduardo Pasterinho

twitchquotes: Wแด‡สŸสŸ แดแด‡แด› Kส€ษชแด˜แด˜แด€ส€ษชแด€ษด! Iแด› ษชs I, Bส€แด€แดขษชสŸษชแด€ษด Nแด. 1 า“แดœแด›ส™แดสŸ แด˜สŸแด€สแด‡ส€ Eแด…แดœแด€ส€แด…แด Pแด€sแด›แด‡ส€ษชษดสœแด. Aา“แด›แด‡ส€ แดส แด›แด‡แด€แด ษขแดแด› แดกส€แด‡แด„แด‹แด‡แด… ส™ส แด›สœแด‡ Gแด‡ส€แดแด€ษด แด›ส€สสœแด€ส€แด…s, I า“แด‡แด€ส€ า“แดส€ แดส แดŠแดส™. PสŸs สœแด‡สŸแด˜ ส™ส แด…แดษดแด€แด›ษชษดษข sแด€สŸแด› แดส€ แด›แดแด˜แด…แด‡แด„แด‹ษชษดษข แดส sแด€สŸแด€ส€ส. PสŸs ษดแด แด„แดแด˜แด€ แด˜แด€sแด›แด‡ส€ษชษดสœแด
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December 2014
Kripp

voting booth inspection is not required

twitchquotes: So I was waiting in line to vote when all of a sudden this voting "official" came up to me and said that there was something wrong with my voter registration and asked me to follow him to the back. When we went around back he said that I had to take off my pants and show my cock because penis size is the most accurate way to confirm voter identity. Because I thought he was a voting official I swiftly removed my pants and underwear to show him my member. After he fondled it for a bit he said it was good and I could go back into the line. It was only after I voted I realized that he forgot to check my balls too!!! He was obviously not certified to check such an area and I immediately contacted the security guards about his presence. Please do not fall for any tricks like I did! stay safe and happy voting!
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November 2020

2020 US Election

๐Ÿ‘…HAPPY NEW YEARS SLUTS ๐Ÿ†

๐Ÿ‘ฏhey SlutS! ๐Ÿ‘ฏ๐Ÿ’… Now that we got our yearly ๐ŸŽ FUCK ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผfrom good ole Saint DICK ๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿพ itโ€™s FINALLY New Years Eve!!!๐Ÿ—“๐Ÿพ๐Ÿ‘… 2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ was a LONGG ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ† and HARD ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŠ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ˜ซ year.... we laughed๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿผ We cried ๐Ÿ˜ข๐Ÿ˜–๐Ÿ‘Ž We coughed ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿค’๐Ÿคง we fucked GOOD๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป dick๐Ÿ† and ๐Ÿ˜ต๐Ÿ˜ตBAD ๐Ÿ˜” dick, ๐Ÿ˜ซ BUTT ๐Ÿ‘ now letโ€™s ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘Celebrate ๐Ÿ™Œ๐ŸŽ‰ and watch that ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ†BIG ๐Ÿ‘… BALL ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿผ Drop ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘„ on us! ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿ’ƒ So spread ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฝ those ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฝ legs ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฝ and count down โฌ‡๏ธ from ๐Ÿ”Ÿ until your man ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿพ pops ๐ŸŽ‰ his CORK ๐Ÿพ๐Ÿพ into that thirsty ๐Ÿ‘…thirsty ๐Ÿ‘… hole! ๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐ Send this to 2๏ธโƒฃ1๏ธโƒฃ COCK-BEGGING โœŠ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ† WHORES to get BUTTFUCKED ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ˜ฑ for the next 3๏ธโƒฃ6๏ธโƒฃ5๏ธโƒฃ days ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜
August 2021

Emoji Pasta

New Years

Holiday Emoji

NSFW

Holiday

Re-read my statement. Your reply is a logical fail

twitchquotes: Re-read my statement. Your reply is a logical fail. I would know because I scored a 174 on the LSAT which got me into Northwestern Law after graduating with top honors from UC Berkeley. BTW...the LSAT is an exam in logic.
twitch chat
April 2019

Stock space rocket

.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ โœฆ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€‚โ€‚ ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€หšใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€*ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ โ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€. ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ โœฆ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ โ€ โ€ โ€ โ€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€,ใ€€ใ€€โ€‚โ€‚โ€‚ใ€€ .ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€๏พŸใ€€โ€‚โ€‚ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€. ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€,ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆโ˜€๏ธ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆโ€ˆโ€Š ใ€€โ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€Šใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆโ€ˆโ€Šโ€Šโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€Šโ€Šใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€. ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€. ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€Šโ€Šใ€€โ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€โ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€Šโ€Šใ€€โ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€Šโ€Šใ€€โ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆ โœฆ โ€‚โ€‚โ€‚ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€,ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€[stock ticker]๐Ÿš€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€,ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ โ€ โ€ โ€ โ€ ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆใ€€โ€Šโ€Šโ€ˆโ€ˆ โ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€Šโ€Šใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€หšใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ โ€‚โ€‚ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€,ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€Šใ€€โ€Šโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ โ€ˆใ€€ใ€€โ€‚โ€‚โ€‚โ€‚ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€* ใ€€ใ€€ โ€‚โ€‚ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ โœฆ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€Šโ€Šใ€€โ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆโ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€‚โ€‚โ€‚โ€‚ใ€€ใ€€. ใ€€โ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ๐ŸŒ‘ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€Šโ€Šโ€Šใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€‚โ€‚ ใ€€หšใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€๏พŸใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ . ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆใ€€ ๐ŸŒŽ โ€ โ€ โ€ โ€ โ€ โ€ โ€ โ€ โ€ โ€ ,ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€* .ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ โœฆ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€‚โ€‚ ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€หšใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€*ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โ€ˆ โ€ˆใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

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