[Copypasta] Impossible to be happy and sad at the same time

twitchquotes: haHAA they say it's impossible to be happy & sad at the same time haHAA My wife told me i have the biggest d*ck out of all my brothers haHAA
twitch chat
October 2016
What happened to this ad? :(
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I Summon Fish Moley

twitchquotes: FishMoley By FishMoley All FishMoley That FishMoley Is FishMoley Holy FishMoley I FishMoley Summon FishMoley Fish FishMoley Moley
twitch chat
June 2017

80 billion dollars in twitch stocks

twitchquotes: 4 people broke into my house and held me hostage last night. Somehow they've heard I hold 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks and wanted me to withdraw it to a specific bank account. I had to explain for 2 hours how it's all fake money and that I've spent almost a week trading fake stocks just to gain nothing. They ended up calling me a fucking loser and left..
twitch chat
March 2019

Hey NON Subs, Thanks for watching the ads for me

twitchquotes: ( ยฐ อœส–อกยฐ)โ•ญโˆฉโ•ฎ Hey NON Subs, Thanks for watching the ads for me ( ยฐ อœส–อกยฐ)โ•ญโˆฉโ•ฎ ( ยฐ อœส–อกยฐ)โ•ญโˆฉโ•ฎ
twitch chat
June 2015
Trump

plebs vs subs

Fluttershy

โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“ โ–“ โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“ โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“ โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“ โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ–’โ–’ โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–“ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–‘โ–’โ–โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“ โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“ โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“
ascii art
November 2014

My poop story

twitchquotes: My poop story. I lived in a dookie (pun on purpose) apartment complex in a college town, literally $300 a month, on a river in the south. So a small and always very high maintenance team worked for them. They showed up (stoned) and were changing everyoneโ€™s filters. Heard. Ok come in. I had a particularly funky little caesars pizza not an hour before the incident. We were making small talk and such as these things tend to linger, I suddenly felt a disturbance in my lower gut (bubbleguts). I felt confident in my distance from the maintenance guy that I got squeeze out a fart and then distract him into another room. This was no fart. At slightest bit of effort I put towards this fart a flood of terrible pizza diarrhea shot out of my ass like a goddamn rocket. As I was staring this man in the eye. I was staring another human being in the eyes...while I pooed my pants. To this day not only do I have no clue if he knew or not but I would still pay thousands of dollars to just see my face when that happened. That is my poop story.
twitch chat
June 2019
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