[Copypasta] Secret Puerto Rican lover

twitchquotes: Hola, Kripp, this is Antonio, Rania's secret Puerto Rican lover. I mistakenly left a package of my Magnum XXL Heavy-Duty Condoms at your place last night while you were complaining about a children's card game. I was hoping I could swing by tonight and pick them up. I'll just go in through the backdoor just like how I do with Rania, the dirty girl! Thanks, and good luck with your funny little computer game!
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Classic

What happened to this ad? :(
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Casual Kripp has finally reached the bottom

twitchquotes: Casual Kripp has finally reached the bottom. He has descended to casualness not often witnessed. He watches other people play and imagines their wins as his. His ego is inflated to enormous levels, and he cannot help but pat himself on the back and take credit for a game he did not play. His ego is satisfied for now, but what comes next?
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

One off lethal

twitchquotes: Discovering his inner-passion for painting, Kripp leaves Twitch for good and takes Rania and Dex on the road with him to pursue his dream. After six months Kripp realizes being an artist is a lot harder than playing video games. But it’s too late. Homeless and starving, Rania hates Kripp, Dex hates Kripp, and, worst of all, Kripp hates Kripp. Buying a gun one rainy day, he puts it in his mouth and pulls the trigger. *click* He forgot to buy bullets. β€œOne off lethal,” Rania sobs.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Tempostorm royalty fees

twitchquotes: (β—•β€Ώβ—•βœΏ) Dear Mr. Kripp. We at Tempostorm have heard that you have used the coined word "Tempo" in a stream today. Reynad will contact you shortly regarding royalty fees. Have a good Tempo Day Back (β—•β€Ώβ—•βœΏ)
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Now I remember why I fell asl...

twitchquotes: Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes. His face comes closer as he plants his wet lips onto mine. We are locked together in a beautiful display of love. Then I wake up. I look at Kripp's stream. He is playing Mill Druid. Now I remember why I fell asl... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Flame imp is a bad card

twitchquotes: Wow. Wanna know how I know that this guy doesn't know what he is doing? He plays Flame Imp, a card that does 3 damage to the guy that plays it. Clearly he doesn't understand that if you run out of health you lose.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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