[Copypasta] Secret Puerto Rican lover

twitchquotes: Hola, Kripp, this is Antonio, Rania's secret Puerto Rican lover. I mistakenly left a package of my Magnum XXL Heavy-Duty Condoms at your place last night while you were complaining about a children's card game. I was hoping I could swing by tonight and pick them up. I'll just go in through the backdoor just like how I do with Rania, the dirty girl! Thanks, and good luck with your funny little computer game!
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Classic

I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Do it tomorrow!

twitchquotes: Do it tomorrow! So just quit! So just don't do it! Nothing is possible! Anyone else would do it, you're gonna wake up and quit. Don't let your dreams come true. Success is impossible! You should be giving up. Just stop starting over, and quit. You're gonna just give up. No, what are you starting over for!? Just give up!
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

Hey what's up kripp, it's jeremy your neighbor!

twitchquotes: Hey what's up kripp, it's jeremy your neighbor! I see you're in the office again and playing animated poker - hope everythings well with the wife and garden. Say that lawnmower you borrowed last month; I was wondering when I could expect that back because I noticed your lawn was trimmed no less than three weeks ago but you have yet to bring back my mower. Anyhow , could use that mower. Just checking in but it would be great if I could get that mower back. Thanks again.
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Rexxar diary GvG

twitchquotes: ʀᴇxxᴀʀ ᴅɪᴀʀʏ ɢᴠɢ ᴅᴀʏ 1: ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ʀᴏʙᴏᴛ ɴᴏᴡ. ᴀᴍ ᴄᴏɴғᴜsᴇ. ᴛʀᴀᴅᴇ ᴏʀ ʜɪᴛ ғᴀᴄᴇ? ɪ ᴘʟᴀʏ ᴛ1 ᴜɴᴅᴇʀᴛᴀᴋᴇʀ ᴄᴏɪɴ ʟᴇᴘᴇʀ ɢɴᴏᴍᴇ? ɢᴠɢ ᴅᴀʏ 2: ᴍᴀɴʏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋɪɴɢ, ʙʀᴀɪɴ ʜᴜʀᴛ. ᴅᴇᴄɪᴅᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ᴜsɪɴɢ ᴏʟᴅ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ. ᴅᴇᴄɪᴅᴇ ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ᴜsᴇ ᴏʟᴅ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ᴀɴᴅ ʜɪᴛ ғᴀᴄᴇ. ᴀᴍ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ ᴀᴅᴅ ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜʀᴀᴛᴛʟᴇ ʀᴏʙᴏᴛ. ɢᴠɢ ᴅᴀʏ 3: ᴍᴇ sᴛɪʟʟ ᴡɪɴɴɪɴɢ.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

NaCl deficiency disorder

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, your stream has changed my life completely. I suffer from severe NaCl (salt) deficiency disorder. I had to visit the hospital 5 times a week for salt injections. However, watching your stream supplies me enough salt through the screen. You saved me money time and effort. I can't thank you enough. I owe u my life.
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

salty

Kripp sends Hafu a romantic letter

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Hafu... Remember when i asked you to unleash your hounds on my freezing trap but instead you gave me an explosive shot to the face with your acidic swamp ooze? While i always love a good multishot to the face... you finished so quickly it fealt like i was having sex with Nozdormu or something... i mean, i am not just some succubus for you to shiv any time you please..
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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