[Copypasta] I dream of becoming a carrot

twitchquotes: I dream of becoming a carrot. When I'm home alone I dig holes in the backyard and stand in them, put lettuce on top of my head from sun up to sun down. I would steal sun tan spray from stores and use it until I turned a bright orange. People tell me it's impossible for me to be a carrot but I know I can be anything I want to be.
twitch chat
May 2016

Classic

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

Just a feller out on the farm

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⡿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⢿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡄⡇⠀⠀ KKona ⠀⠈⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣧⣇⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣶⣷⠀⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣀⠀⣠⣤⢀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⣿⣷⠀⠀ ⣸⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⡷⠀ ⠻⢿⣿⡏⠀⠀⣶⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣧⣀ ⠀⠀⢹⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣉⡉⠉⠉⠉⠉⢙⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⠛⠓ ⠀⠈⠛⠛⠛⠓⠒⠚⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠟⠿⠷⠶⠶⠾⠿⢿⠿⠿⠿ Don't mind me, just a feller out on the farm.
March 2019

Classic

Priced in

Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
December 2020

Classic

WallStreetBets

Greetings Kripp, I am Dr. Hannibal Lector

twitchquotes: ༼ つ ͡ ͡° ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡° ༽つ Greetings Kripp, I am Dr. Hannibal Lector, renowned Psychiatrist based in Baltimore, Maryland. I have heard you are the saltiest man alive, I am intrigued by a man of your... tastes. I would like to invite you for... dinner. ༼ つ ͡ ͡° ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡° ༽つ
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Classic

salty

Think you can beat me?

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⠄⠒⠂⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⣰⣶⣦⡈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄THINK ⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣖⣿⣷⣴⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄YOU ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⠛⠩⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄CAN ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⡏⠉⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄BEAT ⠄⠄⢀⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠺⡇⠄⢵⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ME ⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠁⠄⣷⣀⠈⠙⠛⠑⠄⠄⠄⠄1,2,3? ⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⡇⠹⣿⣿⣿⡦⠄⠹⢿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⢰⣤⣀⣀⣠⣔⢰⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡈⠄⠄⠄ ⢠⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⢸⡆⠄⠐⠄⢸⣿⣌⠄⠄ ⢸⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⢸⣿⡿⢿⡤⠄⠈⠄⠄⢀⠄⢰⣿⣿⡄⠄ ⠈⢿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⣿⣷⣦⠄⠐⠄⠄⠄⠘⠄⠘⢿⣿⡇⠄ ⠄⠈⠻⣿⣇⠠⠄⢀⡉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡆⠄⠄⠘⣿⡇⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣧⢀⣿⣿⢷⣶⣶⣶⣾⢟⣾⣄⠄⡴⣿⡀⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣧⣝⣿⣷⣝⢿⣿⠇⢸⣿⣿⡎⡡⠋⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣝⠛⠋⠁⣿⣿⡎⢠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⠁⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄
November 2018

Classic

AMOGUS (youtube video) v2

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⢛⣿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣟⠛⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣛ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡿⠁⣀⢀⢀⠀⣀⠀⣀⠀⠀⡀⣀⠙⢷⡀⠺⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⣰⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⢰⢿⣿⢻⡿⣿⢿⣯⡼⣧⡇⣿⡆⢸⡇⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⢀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣀⡀⠀⠘⢷⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⠃⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⡏⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠀⡀⠀⠀⠉⠛⢷⣄⠈⢙⡷⠀⠀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡴⠾⠋⠁⣠⡶⠶⠶⠶⠶⣤⡀⠀⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠐⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣶⠻⠟⠛⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡏⣠⣤⠤⠤⣄⡈⢻⡄⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢰⡖⠲⣶⣶⢤⡤⠤⣤⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⡾⠀⠻⣷⣶⡶⠾⠃⠈⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⡿⠿⢿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⢀⣉⣛⠛⠉⢠⡙⠲⢿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠇⠀⠀⠀⢰⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⡇⠀⣿⣧⣤⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣌⠛⠿⠿⠖⣎⣤⣶⡛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠙⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⢠⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠠⢤⡀⠀⢀⡬⠟⣻⣿⣯⠍⠻⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⣠⠶⠶⠶⢶⡀⠀⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⡀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠋⠀⠀⣳⣾⡴⠂⠀⢹⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣸⣰⣛⣛⣺⣀⣀⣸⣆⣀⣀⣸⣇⣀⣀⣸⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠉⠓⢦⣄⣀⣠⣴⣿⣷⣼⣵⣻⡄⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⣀⣸⣧⣤⣤⣤⣤⣼⣄⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠛⠛⢻⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛ ⣀⣀⣸⠁⠀⠀⢀⣶⣶⣦⠀⢀⣟⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀
November 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing