[Copypasta] I dream of becoming a carrot

twitchquotes: I dream of becoming a carrot. When I'm home alone I dig holes in the backyard and stand in them, put lettuce on top of my head from sun up to sun down. I would steal sun tan spray from stores and use it until I turned a bright orange. People tell me it's impossible for me to be a carrot but I know I can be anything I want to be.
twitch chat
May 2016

Classic

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You notice a wall of text in twitch chat

twitchquotes: You notice a wall of text in twitch chat and your hand instinctively goes to the mouse. You scroll up to stop the chat elevator and read the pasta, indulging in its delights... You soon realize that this pasta conveys no information nor is particularly witty or funny. Nevertheless, you drag your mouse across, hit Ctrl+C, then Ctrl+V and press Enter
twitch chat
March 2016

Classic

Japan heart surgeon and yakuza boss

In Japan 🇯🇵 , heart surgeon ❤️👨‍⚕️ . Number one 😭☝️ . Steady hand😳✋️. One day, Yakuza boss 🙇🏻need 🆕 heart💘. I do operation🔪⚔️. But, mistake😱! Yakuza boss die😵😪! Yakuza very mad👿. I hide🙈 in fishing boat🐟🚣🏻‍♀️, come to America🎇🎊🇺🇸. No english🤐, no food😩, no money📉🚫💲. Darryl 👨🏿give me job🙌👨🏻‍💼. Now I have house🏡, American car 🚗 , and new woman 🆕👱🏻‍♀️. Darryl 👨🏿save life⛑. My big secret🙊: I kill ☠️yakuza boss on purpose😈. I good 👍surgeon. The best👌💯!
July 2019

Emoji Pasta

Classic

bbz will u luv me 4evr

gurl was walkin2 skewl wit her bf n they were crossin da rode. she sed "bbz will u luv me 4evr" he said "NO.." ... da gurl cryed N ran across da rode b4 da green man came on the sine. boy was cryin and went to pic up her body. she was ded. he whispered 2 her corpse "I ment 2 sey i will luv u FIVE-ever..." (dat mean he luv her moar den 4evr) xxx~*...LIKE DIS IF U CRY EVRY TIME...~*xxx
March 2021

Classic

AYAYA

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⡛⣿⣿⣿⣯⢻ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢻⣿⣿⢟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣮⡻⣿⣿⣧ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠻⡫⣢⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣜⢻⣿ ⣿⣿⡏⣿⣿⣨⣝⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢕⠸⣛⣩⣥⣄⣩⢝⣛⡿⠿⣿⣿⣆⢝ ⣿⣿⢡⣸⣿⣏⣿⣿⣶⣯⣙⠫⢺⣿⣷⡈⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢿⣟⣒⣋⣙⠊ ⣿⡏⡿⣛⣍⢿⣮⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⢱⣾⣿⣿⣿⣝⡮⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⣋⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡕⣡⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⣿ ⣦⡸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿ ⢛⠷⡹⣿⠋⣉⣠⣤⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢹⣿⣿ ⣷⡝⣿⡞⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠋⠁⣠⣤⣤⣦⣽⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠘⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡹⣿⡼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡿⠟⠉⡀⠄⠄⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣼⣛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⠿⢟⣻⡽⢚⣤⡞⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿
ascii art
October 2018

Weebs

Classic

Doublelift dodges Imaqtpie in queue

twitchquotes: Doublelift fired up his stream for another day of soloQ, but foolishly forgot to check if Imaqtpie was in a game. He opened up QT’s stream to find him sitting in queue… He frantically began tabbing between his client and QT’s stream, then one after the other… both queues popped. “I need the toilet” he said to his chat. He ran to the wall and unplugged his internet. He was safe for another day.
twitch chat
March 2017
imaqtpie

Classic

League of Legends

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