[Copypasta] I dream of becoming a carrot

twitchquotes: I dream of becoming a carrot. When I'm home alone I dig holes in the backyard and stand in them, put lettuce on top of my head from sun up to sun down. I would steal sun tan spray from stores and use it until I turned a bright orange. People tell me it's impossible for me to be a carrot but I know I can be anything I want to be.
twitch chat
May 2016

Classic

(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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November 2020

Classic

Thinking Emoji

β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’ β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’ β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’ β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’ β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’ β–’β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–’ β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’
May 2017

Classic

Leeroy Jenkins created a strategy

twitchquotes: Leeroy Jenkins created a strategy that revolved around trying to defeat your opponent in one turn without requiring any cards on the board. Fighting for board control and battles between minions make an overall game of Hearthstone more fun and compelling, but taking 20+ damage in one turn is not particularly fun or interactive.
twitch chat
May 2017

Classic

Hearthstone

OVERCLOWNFIDENCE

twitchquotes: ( Ν Β° ΝŸπŸ”΄ Ν‘Β°) OVERCLOWNFIDENCE IS A SLOW AND HILARIOUS KILLER ( Ν Β° ΝŸπŸ”΄ Ν‘Β°)
twitch chat
July 2015

Classic

My Grandfather smoked his whole life

My Grandfather smoked his whole life. I was about 10 years old when my mother said to him, 'If you ever want to see your grandchildren graduate, you have to stop immediately.'. Tears welled up in his eyes when he realized what exactly was at stake. He gave it up immediately. Three years later he died of lung cancer. It was really sad and destroyed me. My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your post gave me cancer anyway.
March 2021

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing