[Copypasta] A navy seal trained in gorilla warfare

twitchquotes: Please do not copy and paste this copypasta. It is my original copypasta and is protected by copyright law. If I see anyone pasting my intellectual property without permission, a navy seal trained in gorilla warfare will smite you.
twitch chat
September 2015
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Kripp, this is Aquaman, King of the Seas

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Aquaman, King of the Seas, and I need your help. The salinity of our oceans has reached an all-time low, and only you, with your incredible salt output, can restore them to their proper levels. The fate of countless species of fish and other marine life rests in your scrawny vegan hands. Lend me your aid and I will reveal the ancient Atlantean cure for male-pattern baldness! Aquaman out!
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

Szechuan sauce at McDonald's

"Hey, do you guys have szechuan sauce?", I ask the low IQ minimum wage slave. "N-no, sir. We just ran out", he muttered. I was overcome with a primal rage. I jump on the counter, screaming "I'm Pickle Rick!”. The 200 IQ crowd chanted in unison, “WUBBALUBBA DUB DUB” whilst beating their chests towards the cowering worker. I put my shirt over my head and let out the purest REEE to show my devotion to Rick. Everyone else REEEs as well. Yes, my brothers, let it all out. The manger comes in and calls the police, he doesn’t understand the mature and intellectual nature of our cries. We Naruto run to the next McDonalds store as we search endlessly for that sauce.
October 2017

Rick and Morty

Cake

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⠟⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠛⠛⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣤⣄⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠛⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣄⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⠛⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣤⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣦⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣤⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠙⠛⠻⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇
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August 2019

Reporting a streamer named "TSM_Kripp"

twitchquotes: Hello twitch admins. I am here to report a streamer named "TSM_Kripp". She is currently violating the new twitch rules, and is constantly moaning suggestively in her stream. I am trying to watch her game but she just keeps yelling "TOPDICK" or "INSANE" after she gets rekt. Please take action against her as soon as you can. Thank you.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Booba

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⢂⡉⠐⠀⢂⡁⠄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠀⡐⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠐⠊⠩⠄⢒⡂⠠⠤⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡠⠂⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠐⠂⠤⡈⠀⠂⢄⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠐⠀⠀⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣱⡄⠀⠈⣦ ⠀⡀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿ ⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⠇⠀⠸⠋ ⠘⠀⠀⠀⠀⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠠⠎⠒⠈⠀ ⢀⠀⠀⡀⠄⠢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠠⠄⠐⠀⠁⠀⢄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⢔⣬⣭⣁⠤⠤⠤⠀⠐⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡧⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⢿⣯⣿⢶⡶⣦⣴⣤⣤⣀⢠⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⣴⡛⠁⠀⠀ ⢤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠛⢿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣯⣭⣿⣿⣻⣟⣯⣽⡿⡟⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠙⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠁⠙⠋⠻⠿⠿⠿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⡸⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⠀⠀⠈⠐⠠⢂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠐⣂⣤⣤⣤⣄⣠⣔⣀⣤⣤⣤⣔⠁⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀
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December 2020

Pepe

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