[Copypasta] A navy seal trained in gorilla warfare

twitchquotes: Please do not copy and paste this copypasta. It is my original copypasta and is protected by copyright law. If I see anyone pasting my intellectual property without permission, a navy seal trained in gorilla warfare will smite you.
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September 2015
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November 2021

What could possibly be that washed up?

twitchquotes: Hey QT, my family just got back from Hawaii. We noticed this obese life form washed up on shore. We walked over to see what could possibly be that washed up. My brother poked it with a stick and it twitched and said "wow that actually fuckin killed me" wonder what it could be?
twitch chat
June 2019
imaqtpie

Classic

League of Legends

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my übernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021

FrankerZ

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⠤⣤⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣶⣄⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠉⢹⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆ ⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣼⠁⠀⠀⢠⣤⣬⣇⣀⣠⡿⠋⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏ ⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠹⣿⣿⡽⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⠁⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠙⠃⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣤⡀⠀⠈⢻⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⠿⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠛⠛⠂⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
September 2020

Please stop the ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ in your chat

twitchquotes: Hello KRIPP aka GRIPPARRIAN. Please stop the ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ in your chat. I am from dubai and "ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ " means "your aunt has a goat ***" in arabic. I am watching with family after my aunt's funeral and we all find this extremely offensive. Will subscribe so you can fist me like a bro when it stops. Please no dan marino gran torino
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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