[Copypasta] I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire

twitchquotes: I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire and prophetic indictments of contemporary Twitch chat. Copypasta when I was a younger teenager had the potency to topple Nazi moderatorships and revolutionize new chat epochs. Even the truncation of "copypasta" to "pasta" shows a lack of eloquence that speaks volumes. If, like me, you are a product of those better times and wish to see them return then speak out. Let the memers and Toucans know that real copypasta back.
twitch chat
July 2015

MODS

Classic

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

Fuck You Chat

⠄⢸⣿⡟⠛⠛⠃⢸⣿⡇⠄⠄⣿⡇⠄⣼⣿⠟⠻⣿⣆⠄⣿⣿⢠⣾⣿⠋⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⣿⣷⣶⣶⠄⢸⣿⡇⠄⠄⣿⡇⠄⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣧⣀⣰⣿⡇⠄⢿⣿⣀⣠⣿⡶⠄⣿⣿⠃⢹⣿⣆⠄⠄ ⠄⠘⠛⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠛⠛⠛⠋⠄⠄⠈⠛⠛⠛⠛⠁⠄⠛⠛⠄⠄⠛⠛⠃⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣤⡄⠄⠄⣤⣤⠄⢀⣠⣤⣄⡀⠄⢠⣤⡄⠄⠄⣤⣤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣄⣼⣿⠃⣰⣿⠟⠛⢿⣿⡄⢸⣿⡇⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⣿⡿⠁⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⡇⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡇⠄⠄⠹⣿⣦⣤⣼⣿⠃⠄⣿⣷⣤⣴⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠛⠃⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠛⠋⠁⠄⠄⠈⠙⠛⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⣠⣤⣤⣄⡀⠄⣤⣤⠄⠄⣤⣤⠄⠄⠄⣤⣤⡄⠄⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣾⣿⠋⠙⠿⠗⠄⣿⣿⣀⣀⣿⣿⠄⠄⣸⣿⢿⣷⠄⠛⠛⣿⣿⠛⠛⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⣀⠄⠄⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⠄⢠⣿⣏⣸⣿⡆⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠻⣿⣦⣴⣿⡟⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⣼⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⡀⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠉⠄⠄⠉⠉⠄⠄⠉⠉⠄⠉⠉⠄⠄⠈⠉⠁⠄⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄
June 2019

Classic

I hate Twitch Chat

This player is fantastic

twitchquotes: This [insert CSGO team or player here] is fantastic. Just needs to work on communication, aim, map awareness, crosshair placement, economy management, pistol aim, awp flicks, grenade spots, smoke spots, pop flashes, positioning, bomb plant positions, retake ability, bunny hopping, spray control and getting a kill.
twitch chat
July 2020

Classic

CSGO

Jeff Bezos vs Elon Musk

Jeff Bezos -Bald -Exwife took half his networth -Second richest person Elon Musk -Grew back full head of hair -Has girlfriend, allegedly had a threesome with Amber Heard and Cara Delevingne -Richest person TSLA > AMZN
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

This is Bob Ross communicating from beyond the grave

twitchquotes: CoolStoryBob Hi, this is Bob Ross communicating from beyond the grave. I dedicated my life to painting so that you brats could do something more productive with your lives than sitting on your *** playing your stupid Atari games all day. I don't appreciate you morons abusing my legacy and turning me into some childish meme that you can spam on your little MSM chat thing. Now go paint a mountain or something and don't you dare copypaste this. CoolStoryBob
twitch chat
October 2016
Bob Ross

Classic

The Coldest Place in the Universe May Actually Be a Sussy Baka

The Boomerang Nebula, located roughly 5,000 light-years away from our solar system, has a temperature of 1 Kelvin (-272 °C or -460 °F) making it the coldest natural place in the universe humanity has discovered. First found in 1995 by astronomers in Chile, we have since learned quite a bit about it. The Boomerang Nebula is a young planetary nebula which has reached such cold temperatures due to its unusually rapid expansion. However, recently, modern online enthusiasts have raised one question science has yet been unable to answer: is it sus? The profound similarities between the Boomerang Nebula and the characters from the hit game Among Us have led many to believe that the Boomerang Nebula is, in fact, awfully sus, but science has yet to confirm, deny, or even respond to these questions. Follow for more updates on this developing story.
June 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing