[Copypasta] Hello Children, this is Sandown's mother

twitchquotes: Hello Children, this is Sandown's mother, I am here to politely ask you all to stop making fun of my son. He has always had social problems and it really hurts his feelings when you guys make fun of him. I'm sure you will all be reasonable about this.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

I sexually Identify as going second

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as going second. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of being at a mana disadvantage for ten turns. People say to me that a winning when going second is Impossible and I’m *** retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install four cards in my opening hand as well as the coin on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “UNKNOWN” and respect my right to instantly lose the majority of games. If you can’t accept me you’re a turn-twophobe
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

Sorry I dropped my bag of doritos

twitchquotes: ▼ ◄▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ sorry I dropped my bag of doritos
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Never lucky veganism

twitchquotes: In a new study scientists aimed to find the origin of luck by studying an internet celebrity known as Kripparian, famous for playing a children's card game for thousands to watch, after inumerous claims of being "never lucky" while playing said game. The scientists eventually isolated a single variable known only to this particular individual: veganism. While it might yet be soon to draw any conclusions, scientists seem to agree that a meat-rich diet is indeed the cure for "never lucky".
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

This guy's such a bad player!

twitchquotes: ☑ "This guy's such a bad player!” ☑ “You seen my deck guys, there was nothing I could've done” ☑ "How am I losing against these NOOBS" ☑ “This is hearthstone guys” ☑ "I lost" ☑ “He played like trash and got lucky” ☑ “FUCKIN' EH” ☑
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

learn instead of crying

twitchquotes: This is a game of pure skill and you lost because you were completely outplayed and outmaneuvered. It's better to learn from your mistakes instead of crying because you believe your opponents are luckier than you are. One day, when you can actually admit to your mistakes, you might actually be better at the game. :)
twitch chat
November 2019
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing