[Copypasta] Terminating your casual account

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp this is BLIZZARD, remember how we gave you every card...golden! Just to get you to legend. And you're stuck at 9? Its the end of the season Kripp... were gonna have to terminate your casual account.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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United States of America is now known as West Iran

twitchquotes: The year is 2024. The United States of America is now known as West Iran after the assassination of Supreme Leader Donald Trump from drone warfare. I hide in my nuclear bunker, praying to God that I survive another night. I open my laptop and see Kripp streaming some HS battlegrounds, still forcing murlocs and hardstuck at 7k MMR. "Still never lucky, huh old friend..." I whisper to myself as the bombs fall outside...
twitch chat
February 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

NOT ANOTHER CHILDREN'S CARD GAME

twitchquotes: Kripp sighs sitting at the dinner table. โ€œI have to play hearthstone again, FUCK!โ€ Rania consoles him, โ€œItโ€™s okay sweetheart. I love you.โ€ Kripp responds in tears โ€œI have been having fun playing POE but I only got 6k viewers last night, how will we eat if I donโ€™t play that goddamned Hearthstone for these morons!โ€ Rania wraps her arms around Krippโ€™s neck, โ€œItโ€™s okay baby, itโ€™ll be different, when Artifact comes out!โ€ Kripp lets out a scream, โ€œNOT ANOTHER FUCKING CHILDRENโ€™S CARD GAME!โ€
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Artifact

VEGAN MAN

twitchquotes: VEGAN MAN ๐ŸŒŠ ๐Ÿ˜ Take me by the hand โœ‹ lead me to the spam that you understand ๐Ÿ™Œ ๐ŸŒŠ VEGAN MAN ๐ŸŒŠ ๐Ÿ˜ The voyage ๐Ÿšฒ to the top of the ๐ŸŒŽdeck is a real trip ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐ŸŒŠ VEGAN MAN ๐ŸŒŠ ๐Ÿ˜ The crust of a Romanian man ๐Ÿ‘ณ fueled by the banned ๐Ÿ‘ Soaking up the ๐Ÿ’ฆ salt in the spam ๐Ÿ’ฏ
twitch chat
September 2016
Kripp

Emoji Pasta

Kripp discovered one weird trick to look twice his age

twitchquotes: Kripp is the remarkable twenty year old that discovered one weird trick to look twice his age. It's called being VEGAN and it limits your bodyโ€™s nutritional intake and makes you look and feel TWICE AS OLD. Why would anyone want to be vegan you may ask, well all vegans hate animals so they eat all the animals food so that they starve to death.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Kripp wins Best Actor

twitchquotes: It is the 2018 Oscars and Tom Hanks stands at the podium to announce Best Actor. โ€œBoy,โ€ he says, โ€œwe got a real competition this year! Johnny Depp, Leo DiCaprio, George Clooney, anyone could win!โ€ The world holds its breath to see who will win the most prestigious acting award in the world. โ€œWow!โ€ says Hanks. โ€œI donโ€™t believe it! The winner is Kripparrian in his โ€˜Unsponsoredโ€™ Hero Academy 2โ„ข Stream!โ€
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

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