[Copypasta] Please stop spamming, for Bernard

twitchquotes: Guys please stop spamming. My dog, Bernard, looked at my chat and got so dizzy because of the spam that he fell down and hit his noggin right on his food bowl! He couldn't talk for hours. Please stop spamming, for Bernard.
twitch chat
December 2014

Classic

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

You've been gnomed

โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–—โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–—โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ƒโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–ƒโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ƒโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ƒโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–“
โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–“
โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ
โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„
โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆ
โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘
October 2018

Classic

Priced in

Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
December 2020

Classic

WallStreetBets

Start with something small like your intelligence

twitchquotes: I've heard shoving things up your ass is quite painful so you might want to start with something small like your intelligence and build up to bigger things like your ego
twitch chat
March 2020

Classic

American Test Passed

twitchquotes: โœ“ Obesity โœ“ ๐Ÿ’ฅ๐Ÿ”ซ โœ“ Laziness โœ“ Stupidity โœ“ ๐ŸŒต โœ“ McDonald's โœ“ Donald Trump โœ“ $70k College โœ“ Bad healthcare โœ“ Bad food โœ“ Bad music โœ“ Fahrenheit โœ“ Pounds โœ“ Inches โœ“ AMERICAN TEST PASSED
twitch chat
September 2015

Classic

EU vs NA

Remove this part of the message after pasteing in chat

twitchquotes: Wow great game!! PogChamp PogChamp (remove this part of the message after pasteing in chat, your $1 has been sent to your Paypal account, Bethesda)
twitch chat
March 2017
Kripp

sellout

Classic

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