[Copypasta] My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high

twitchquotes: My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high. I've never actually taken an IQ test, mind you, but my educated guess is that, if I did, my score would be whatever is the highest possible. No doubt your IQ is lower than mine, but please don't feel stupid or insecure about this, it's not your fault. You're probably just born that way. And you know what? Thank your lucky stars and subpar genetic makeup that you don't have to bear the burden of brilliance like I have to. Being incredibly intelligent is a curse. This is not just one of the many astute observations I have every day, by the way, it is a fact recently confirmed by science.
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January 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⢉⣿⣄⠀⠉⠉⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⠿⠉⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⢃⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣴⣿⡟⠃⠀⠀⠀⣰⣶⣮⣝⡻⢡⣿⣿⣿⡆⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣦⠀⠀ ⠀⣼⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣮⠹⢋⣾⣿⣷⡄⡀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣧⠀ ⢰⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⡿⠎⣛⣿⣿⡟⣰⣿⣿⡿⢋⣼⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⡆ ⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠨⣭⣘⡿⣿⢟⣵⣿⣿⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡘⣿⣿⣷⣝⢿⣿⣵⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡌⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⠸⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠎⢿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⠇ ⠀⢻⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⣾⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⡟⠀ ⠀⠀⠻⣿⣧⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣼⣿⠟⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣶⣀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣀⣾⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣶⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⠟.
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June 2020

BREAKING NEWS

twitchquotes: ＢＲＥＡＫＩＮＧ ＮＥＷＳ： Ａｆｔｅｒ ｂｒｕｔａｌ ａｎａｌ ｆｉｓｔｉｎｇ ｐｅｒｆｏｒｍｅｄ ｂｙ Ｒｏｍａｎｉａｎ ｇｙｐｓｙ Ｋｒｉｐｐａｒｉａｎ， Ｓａｎｄｏｗｎ＇ｓ ａｎｕｓ ｈａｄ ａｎ ｅｍｏｔｉｏｎａｌ ｂｒｅａｋｄｏｗｎ ａｎｄ ｃｒｉｅｄ ｆｏｒ ａｔｔｅｎｔｉｏｎ ｏｎ ｔｈｅ ｓｔｒｅａｍ ｏｆ Ｋｒｉｐｐａｒｉａｎ．
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hey, Mr. Morosan, this is Mike from Video Playground

twitchquotes: Hey, Mr. Morosan, this is Mike from Video Playground, the adult marketplace. You've been ignoring my calls about your outstanding debt of $12.99 for Big Vegan Balls IV. I'm not here to shame or embarrass you for your taste in husky, sweaty man love, but I've got a business to run, and I wouldn't be able to provide you with the entertainment you frequently enjoy if I didn't get paid. Please don't make me revoke your platinum membership.
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Obey the call of Kripp'Thuzad

twitchquotes: ༼ ºل͟º ༽ Minions, (ง •̀_•́)ง servants, <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ soldiers of the cold dark, obey the call of ( ͡ʘ╭͜ʖ╮͡ʘ) Kripp'Thuzad ( ͡ʘ╭͜ʖ╮͡ʘ)!!!
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

His name was Norman Reedus

I had this friend who used to brag to us all the time that he could catch his cum in his mouth without fail every time he masturbated. He actually wrote down how many times he successfully did it. 327. I’ll never forget that number. And every day at school, he would talk about this. It was always during lunch my sophomore year of high school, too..so it was extremely unnecessary. He used to always try to demonstrate his techniques with packets of mayonnaise but we’d always threaten to move tables so he’d stop. He was really one of those people who needed attention constantly. Aside from those times at lunch, he was a completely normal dude. Like…even after class we’d ask him about that stuff and be like “dude, what was with that cum stuff at lunch,” and he’d always look at us like we were crazy and say “what the hell are you talking about?” I’ll never forget that classmate. His great personality will always be remember but his perplexing obsession with catching his own ejaculate in his mouth will live on forever at my previous high school. He was a one of a kind guy. His name was Norman Reedus.
April 2021
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