[Copypasta] My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high

twitchquotes: My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high. I've never actually taken an IQ test, mind you, but my educated guess is that, if I did, my score would be whatever is the highest possible. No doubt your IQ is lower than mine, but please don't feel stupid or insecure about this, it's not your fault. You're probably just born that way. And you know what? Thank your lucky stars and subpar genetic makeup that you don't have to bear the burden of brilliance like I have to. Being incredibly intelligent is a curse. This is not just one of the many astute observations I have every day, by the way, it is a fact recently confirmed by science.
twitch chat
January 2019
I used to be a real ad
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GME bank consultation

Short story-time for amusement reasons only: some days ago, I went to my bank (Austria). I am the owner of quite a number of GME shares and my broker app is actually just the bank-intern bond trading app, where I need to pay transactional feed everytime I buy (what is sell?) GME shares. I informed myself about the reasoning of those transactional fees beforehand and found out that by paying them, I have the right of consultation by my bank about the shares they‘re trading/I‘m buying. So, I went to the main national building of my bank, they were really friendly at the beginning, enthustiatically, I mentioned GME to them and that I wish for professional consultation about the financial details involved with that stock (I am not a financial guy, actually, I don‘t exactly know what‘s going on, it‘s all pretty crazy to me). Suddenly, their posture and mimick changed pretty suddenly. I was told, they are not allowed to consult about GME. To my question, why this was the case, they told me, because GME is „too irrelevant for the big stock market“. They are „aware of the past short squeeze, but one should no longer focus on GME“. They acted as if GME was some „childish financial playground“ that should be forgotten about. When I confronted them with the huge recent naked short attacks and if they could explain to me possible effects of them if they were not covered, they just repeated themselves how „GME is not relevant, please focus on stocks like Apple or Amazon to be safe“. I left the bank, buying more GME shares.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

Reynad would like Forsen to join Temple Storm

twitchquotes: Hi Foreskin, it's Reynard here. I want you to join my team Temple Storm. You are very salty and we like that. I will play you $500 American, more than a Swede makes in a lifetime. I will also be requiring your salt for my hair.
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

Because it's a cool cat

twitchquotes: CoolCat FORCED CoolCat TO CoolCat SPAM CoolCat THIS CoolCat EMOTE CoolCat BECAUSE CoolCat ITS CoolCat A CoolCat COOL CoolCat CAT CoolCat
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

Corridor creeper nerfed

twitchquotes: 🐛In the dungeon I go deeper🐛in set reviews I was a sleeper🐛when minions die I get cheaper🐛You guessed it right🐛I'm 3 attack weaker🐛
twitch chat
September 2018

Hearthstone

You've been visited by Hellbear Smasher of fortune

twitchquotes: ʕ ͡·ᴥ ͡· ʔ You've been visited by Hellbear Smasher of fortune. Clap your paws and copy paste this message 5 times without getting banned by mods and luck be with you for the next year ʕ ͡·ᴥ ͡· ʔ
twitch chat
August 2014
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