[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Fortnite default dance 10

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⣶⠀⠀⣀⣤⣶⣤⣉⣿⣿⣤⣀ ⠤⣤⣿⣤⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀ ⠀⠛⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠛⠿⣿⣤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠀⠀⠀⣶⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⠀⣿⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠉⠉ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠉ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣛⣿⣭⣶⣀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠉⠛⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣉⠀⣶⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠿⠛
ascii art
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers

"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers, rather it is advice for them. When participating in intense periods of gaming, the human hand has a tendency to get sweaty. The sweat causes the hand to become slick, and it b becomes more difficult to retain a grip on the gamers gaming mouse, thus making it more difficult to perform well in intense gaming moments. By touching grass with the gamers hand, the grass will impart a layer of particulate onto the gamers hand, the particulate can be made of a variety of dusts, dirts and other natural matter. This particulate will then act in a similar form to climbers chalk, absorbing the sweat and drying out the gamers hand. With dry hands, the gamer can now perform to their maximum when gaming. This is why when an enemy or teammate tells you to touch grass, they are simply trying to assist you in performing better.
July 2021

Classic

Lockwood Streets 112

twitchquotes: An MR-RL time. Me and Marc Rutzou. Me and fucking Marc Rutzou. That's fucking right. I skipped 1:13. I am a fucking legend. I've never SEEN a 1:13 and I never fucking will. 1:12 baby. Til the day I fucking die. YES!!! Bout time I get a fucking lucky break in this fucking game. MotherFUCKERS! And I CLUTCHED the goddamn grenade launcher. That's FUCKING right. Yeah it's this one. Right here IT'S THIS ONE! My insane pace. Right here! THIS is the 1:12. Right here. YES!!! It's fucking it. I'mma have to jus - I'mma have to find the actual whole vid of it and I'mma have to get it. DUUUUUUUDE WHAT A RUSH! WHAT A RUUUUUUSH! Watch this. Watch when I get the grenade launcher. (sorry) Look at that. See how fast my pace is? Right in the FUCKING HEAD!!! YEEEAAAHHH! Got a FUCKING 1:12 baby. That's RIGHT! You see that CLUTCHNESS? I AM FUCKING CCC-LUTCH! Look at this fucking line I take. I'm like, YEAH baby. Let's fucking DO this. I wait I wait I wait... Right when he starts firing to try to backboost me. The double. Body armor. Two quick ones. I already know I'm gettin' there on the perfect line. LOOK AT THE FUCKING PACE! FIFTY! FOURTY-NINE! MWH FOURTY-SEVEN BABY! That's FUCKING right. That's FUCKING IT! Fucking PUMPED watching this one again. I waited the cinema too 'cause i said oh my God it might be 1:12. And it FUCKING IS!!! IT FUCKING IS baby. YEAH!!! Look at me typing you guys. You guys didn't believe me. I am typing a storm. Dude I FUCKING just got Streets 1:12! It's not fucking comin' off. YES!!! I FUCKING DID IT THAT'S RIGHT! I SKIPPED 1:13 I'M A LEGEND. I AM A FUCKING LEGEND. I'm a FUCKING legend. (YES!) I am a fucking legend.
twitch chat
May 2020

Year 2020 Jared loses a game in D3

twitchquotes: Year 2020 Jared loses a game in D3 , but he manages to think positively... If something is wrong, fix it if you can. But train yourself not to worry. Worry never fixes anything... he continues to lose another game.... I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past... is what he tells himself... he loses another one ... and reaches for the glock
twitch chat
April 2016
Annie Bot

Boosted Animal Jared

League of Legends

HAPPY IMPEACHMENT DAY

twitchquotes: 🚨🚨🚨HAPPY IMPEACHMENT DAY to all my freedom🗽loving hoes💦👅👅👅who put the 🍑in IM🍑MENT😛😛😛looks like donald💰🤮finally got caught👩‍✈️👨‍✈️trying to call daddy ukraine🇺🇦🇺🇦 to take out hoe biden🧓🏻🔥 but now we need to RIDE🏇CUMgress 🏛raw😩😩👅👅 so they can’t back down️, send this to🔟of your💃🏻wokest📝woes🔥🍌or say 👋BYE to ur independence🙏🏻😩eating that IMPEACHMENT🇺🇸DAY🇺🇸ASS 🍑is the only️ ethical👌form of consumption😋😋😋under late capitalism💸💵💴💶so WE’RE ALL EATING TODAY☭☭☭️🍆🔥💦👅
twitch chat
December 2019
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