[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

BAN ONE FROG GET THE WHOLE POND

twitchquotes: BAN FeelsGoodMan ONE FeelsGoodMan FROG FeelsGoodMan GET FeelsGoodMan THE FeelsGoodMan WHOLE FeelsGoodMan POND
twitch chat
March 2018

Ban X Get The Whole Y

Jared we need to talk, are you boosted?

twitchquotes: "Jared we need to talk" said QT sitting down at the table. "We think you have a problem" said Dom. " are you boosted?" they asked in unison. Jared began to break down and cry as he looked at his D3 account. "I dont think I'll ever get to play with you guys again unless I do" said Jared. "Quit being a *** pussy" said Dom and QT as Jared eyed the glock on the table next to them.
twitch chat
April 2016
imaqtpie

Boosted Animal Jared

League of Legends

I watched your stream and went 1-3 just like you!

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp I'm 12 and I'm your biggest fan! I saw you play Artosis last year at BlizzCon, are you gonna win BlizzCon this year Kripp? I heard you were good at Arena. I watched your stream and went 1-3 just like you!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

This folder is empty

twitchquotes: 📂 My PC------------------------------------------------------------ └📁 Forsen Sub-------------------------------------------------------└⚠️ this folder is empty PepeHands
twitch chat
November 2018
Forsen

Classic

When I was 13, I came out to my parents as a Morbius male.

When i was 13, i came out to my parents as a morbius male. They couldnt accept my morbality, so they sent me off to camp. They just didnt understand— i was morbed that way. At the camp, they gave us electromorb therapy to morb us into beta males. I resisted the treatment, being a morbius male, you cant morb me out of being morbed. I fooled the counselors into thinking they had successfully morbed be into a beta male, and i returned home. To this day, i live a double life— one for my parents, who still cannot accept morbality, and one where its always morbin time.
June 2022

Morbius

Text-to-Speech Playing