[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
I used to be a real ad
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SIMP CHECK

twitchquotes: SIMP CHECK monkaS 👉 pokiW IM SAFE PogU
twitch chat
June 2020

Simps

My son got kicked out of school

twitchquotes: My son got kicked out of school for letting a girl jerk him off in class. That's three schools now. Maybe teaching isn't for him. FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
August 2017

Six foot antlers

twitchquotes: I bet all you beta f*gs don't wear antlers either. Science has shown that the male deers with the largest antlers attract the most females, so obviously the exact same principle works for human females. When I walk into the club reeking of sweat with six foot antlers strapped to my head, I get the attention of every female in the room. Pretty much ever man too, that's how powerful the effect is.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

G2

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣷⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⠁⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣷⢀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣶⣄⡀⣾⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢁⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠐⠶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣡⣿⣿⣿⣿⠶⠂⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣦⡬⢙⠛⠿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⠿⠛⡋⢥⣴⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣇⢸⣿⣷⣦⣍⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣩⣴⢾⣿⡇⣸⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⢸⣿⣟⠻⣿⣷⣦⡹⢏⣴⣾⣿⠏⢻⣿⡇⣿⣿⣷⡀⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⢀⡀⠹⣿⣷⣿⣿⠏⠵⣚⣾⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄ ⢴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡈⣿⣿⡸⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣖⣾⣿⣿⣿⢁⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡦ ⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠸⣿⣧⡉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠋⣩⣥⠆⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁ ⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡙⣿⣷⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣾⣿⢋⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⣿⡿⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⡿⠃⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⡇⣿⠟⣩⣾⣿⣿⠘⢿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣷⣦⣴⣾⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢈⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
August 2020

I once knew this man. He was from the ocean

twitchquotes: I once knew this man. He was from the ocean. He did very Ocean-y things. He took me by the hand to take me to the land that you understand. He was the crust of a tan man imbibed by the sand, Soaking up the thirst of the land. Soaking up the thirst of the land. His Shin was in the shape of an "O". Don't know what to call him though...any ideas?
twitch chat
June 2017
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