[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Please stop spamming random copy pastas like some machine

Please stop spamming random copy pastas like some machine, it's ruining my Twitch chat experience. Don't conform to standard like everyone else, think for yourselves!
July 2021

Dear Mr. Morosan, this is the Hellenic Ministry of Health

twitchquotes: Dear Mr. Morosan, this is the Hellenic Ministry of Health. We have received reports of excessive PJSalt production on your Twitch channel. You are a toxic individual and are hereby classified a Class A threat to national security. Please turn yourself in at the nearest Kappa station to be deported.
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

salty

The art of sucking

twitch chat
September 2017

Thomas the Tank Engine

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣼⣷⣿⣿⠿⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⣾⢟⣭⣝⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠩⢒⠂⠀⠀⠀⠤⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣸⣸⣯⣻⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠈⡉⠙⠄⠀⠐⠉⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠈⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠿⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⢀⣠⣤⡤⠒⠺⠛⢄⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡏⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠁⠀⠤⠤⠤⠂⣹⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⣧⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣽⡿⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⣸⣿⣿⣿⠉⠑⠛⠀⠄⠀⠙⠛⢿⣿⡿⠿⢿⠿⢿⣿⠛⠛⠛⢠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣈⣿⣆⣀⣸⣀⣘⣿⣀⣀⣀⣸⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀ ⠛⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
January 2019

Own a musket for home defense

twitchquotes: Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
twitch chat
August 2019
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing