[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
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Exercise caution and stay away from the Subs

twitchquotes: SECURITY ALERT: A Romanian man, roughly 6'5", skeleton thin, with black hair and scraggly beard has been seen riding the NYC Sub train and violently "Bro-Fisting" passengers. He's accompanied by a short Asian man dressed as Hitler who reputedly cuts out the tongue of anyone who refuses to give him $5. Exercise caution and stay way from the Subs!
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Smirk

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣛⠝⠋⠁⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⠁⠉⠉⠙⠙⠙⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡛⠙⠋⠋⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⠉⠒⢮⣙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣯⠞⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢷⣷⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡶⡶⡶⡷⣿⢿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢛⠓⠗⠗⠟⠞⠟⠷⢷⣯⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⣽⡿⠟⠟⡛⠛⠛⠛⠋⡛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⢴⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠃⢀⣷⣈⢿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡰⣿⡿⣁⣿⡅⠄⠄⠘⢀⣿⣿⠦⣛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣦⣦⣦⣦⣦⣦⣵⣥⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⣼⣿⣿⡟⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡿⠿⠛⣋⣡⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⢡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⣡⣡⣉⣌⣡⣉⣌⣡⣡⣡⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡣⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
February 2021

That's some bad shit right there

twitchquotes: do NOT sign me the FUCK up 👎👀👎👀👎👀👎👀👎👀 bad shit ba̷̶ ԁ sHit 👎 thats ❌ some bad 👎👎shit right 👎👎 th 👎 ere 👎👎👎 right ❌ there ❌ ❌ if i do ƽaү so my selｆ🚫 i say so 🚫 thats not what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ 🚫 👎 👎👎НO0ОଠＯOOＯOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ 👎 👎👎 👎 🚫 👎 👀 👀 👀 👎👎Bad shit
twitch chat
April 2016

Monke

⠄⠄⠄⣠⢴⢴⡴⣤⢤⣄⠄⠄⢀⠄⣀⡤⣴⣺⡽⣯⡷⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⣔⢞⢝⢝⠽⡽⣽⣳⢿⡽⣏⣗⢗⢯⢯⣗⡯⡿⣽⢽⣷⣟⣷⣄ ⠄ ⠄⡗⡟⡼⣸⣁⢋⠎⠎⢯⢯⡧⡫⣎⡽⡹⠊⢍⠙⠜⠽⣳⢯⣿⣳ ⠄ ⠄⢕⠕⠁⣁⢬⢬⣌⠆⠅⢯⡻⣜⢷⠁⠌⡼⠲⠺⢮⡆⡉⢹⣺⣽ ⠄ ⠄⠄⡀⢐⠄⠄⠄⠈⠳⠁⡂⢟⣞⡏⠄⡹⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣺⡐⣞⣾ ⠄ ⠄⢰⡳⡹⢦⣀⣠⡠⠤⠄⡐⢝⣾⣳⣐⣌⠳⠦⠤⠤⣞⢼⢽⣻⡷ ⠄ ⠄⢸⣚⢆⢄⣈⠨⢊⢐⢌⠞⣞⣞⡗⡟⡾⣝⢦⣳⡳⣯⢿⣻⣽⣟ ⠄ ⠄⠘⡢⡫⢒⠒⣘⠰⣨⢴⣸⣺⣳⢥⢷⣳⣽⣳⢮⢝⢽⡯⣿⣺⡽ ⠄ ⠄⠄⠁⠪⠤⢑⢄⢽⡙⢽⣺⢾⢽⢯⡟⡽⣾⣎⡿⣮⡳⣹⣳⣗⠇ ⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⡸⡡⠑⠤⣠⡑⠙⠍⡩⡴⣽⡗⣗⣟⣷⣫⢳⢕⡏ ⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢈⡇⡇⡆⡌⡀⡉⠫⡯⢯⡫⡷⣽⣺⣗⣟⡾⡼⡺ ⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⡮⡎⡎⡎⣞⢲⡹⡵⡕⣇⡿⣽⣳⣟⣾⣳⡯⠉ ⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢯⡣⡣⡣⡣⡣⣗⡽⣽⣳⢯⢷⣳⣻⣺⣗⡇ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠰⡙⠺⢪⢪⡺⡵⣯⣗⡯⡿⣽⢽⢾⣳⠏ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠢⠄⣀⣀⢉⠊⣊⣉⡬⡶⡻⣝⡞ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⢙⢑⢹⣘⠮⠛⠈ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠂⠁⠑⠁⠄⠄ monke
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April 2021

Obi Wan Shapiro

Okay, so let’s say hypothetically, these weren’t the droids you’re looking for. You see, the droids you’re looking for have the Death Star plans, correct? However, as those droid are close minded liberals, and these droids are free thinking informed conservatives, these would not be the droids you’re looking for. Now, if you were to assume that these droids are the droids you’re looking for because they are a protocol droid and an astromech, then that would actually make you the real racists, as you would assume that all astromech droids have the death star plans. So if this were true, these aren’t the droid you’re looking for.
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

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