twitchquotes:
Europe was founded in 1848 by Walker Texas Ranger when he rode a horse across the Atlantic, he called it "Eastern USA" which was eventually abbreviated as just "EU"
twitch chat
What happened to this ad? :(
More Classic Copypastas
Le fedora has arrived
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
βββββββββββleββfedoraβββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββhasββββarrivedββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
Classic
QT's stream ends, so does my life
twitchquotes:
ΜΏ' ΜΏ'\Μ΅ΝΜΏΜΏ\ qt's stream ends, so does my life ΜΏ' ΜΏ'\Μ΅ΝΜΏΜΏ\
ΜΏ' ΜΏ'\Μ΅ΝΜΏΜΏ\ qt's stream ends, so does my life ΜΏ' ΜΏ'\Μ΅ΝΜΏΜΏ\
twitch chat
imaqtpie
Classic
How to commit all 7 deadly sins at once
If you angerly masturbate to another guy's money and jizz in your mouth and compliment yourself for the taste when you're on your shift at work, then you've committed all 7 sins... with room to spare.
Classic
Stroll in my local GameStop
stroll into my local GameStop
looking to pick up a copy of Binding of Isaac
grab the game and take it to the charming maiden at the register
"Pardon me, milady...but could you ring me up? A shame I don't have your number or I'd ring you up instead..."
she giggles and takes the game, blushing as her fingers brush mine due to my fingerless gloves
her eyes widen as she reads the game's title
"Wow, I've never seen anyone buy this before! You must have special taste!"
I smile and ready a witty response when suddenly a voice rings out from behind
"Hahaha look at what this β₯β₯β₯β₯β₯β₯ is buying! That's not Call of Duty Advanced Memefare! What a piece of β₯β₯β₯β₯!"
I quickly turn around, my cloak billowing behind me, to discern the source of the rude outburst
generic dudebro caricature with a sports team cap and "the guy that beat you up that one time behind the school in early October" shirt is standing there guffawing
"Excuse me sir...you may disparage my person if you wish, but it is untoward to swear in front of a lady."
"β₯β₯β₯β₯ you β₯β₯β₯β₯β₯β₯!"
I smile quietly and tip my fedora low across my eyes, concealing them
"As you wish..."
I quickly swing my cane into his kneecap before he can react
he bellows and charges forward
I expertly sidestep him and the cashier screams as he crashes into the counter
I draw my sword-cane and mutter a quiet oath as I drive it deep into his back
"...requiescat in pace..."
As I clean my blade the girl walks out from behind the counter, twirling her hair with her fingers
"So...maybe you'd like to come over to my place to play that game sometime...?
"No thanks, milady, it's only single player. Besides..."
I sheath my sword
"You're not my type."
skate away on my Heelys
Classic
Are you going to pay for another pizza?
twitchquotes:
Hey Kripp! So here I was enjoying my favorite food (pizza) and watching your stream having a good time when it started to taste extra salty. It turns out you were being super salty and now have ruined my pizza. Are you going to pay for another pizza or will I have to call the cops? This is serious.
twitch chat
Kripp