Artifact copypastas

Valve's done it again! Another timeless classic that puts its competition to shame. Make no mistake, Artifact will become king of its genre, and Hearthstone and MTG will become relics of the past. When my wife's boyfriend showed me this game I knew it would be worth my time.

Hearthstone? BabyRage Artifact? BabyRage it's all the same! BabyRage Kripp will baby rage BabyRage no matter the game! BabyRage

Kripp sighs sitting at the dinner table. “I have to play hearthstone again, FUCK!” Rania consoles him, “It’s okay sweetheart. I love you.” Kripp responds in tears “I have been having fun playing POE but I only got 6k viewers last night, how will we eat if I don’t play that goddamned Hearthstone for these morons!” Rania wraps her arms around Kripp’s neck, “It’s okay baby, it’ll be different, when Artifact comes out!” Kripp lets out a scream, “NOT ANOTHER FUCKING CHILDREN’S CARD GAME!”

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Artifact. The gameplay is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the gameplay will go over a typical viewer's head