[Copypasta] I whispered into his ear, my word a soft caress: "LEGAL"

twitchquotes: Hᴇ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴏᴏʟs ʜᴇ ɴᴇᴇᴅᴇᴅ, ʏᴇᴛ ʜᴇ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ɴᴏᴛ sᴇᴇ ɪᴛ. I ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ʜɪᴍ ᴛᴏ sᴜᴄᴄᴇᴇᴅ sᴏ ʙᴀᴅʟʏ, ʜᴇ ᴡᴀs ɴᴇᴀʀʟʏ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ. Bᴜᴛ ʜᴇ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅɴ'ᴛ ғɪɴɪsʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴊᴏʙ ʙʏ ʜɪᴍsᴇʟғ. Bᴀᴍʙᴏᴏᴢʟᴇᴅ ʙʏ ʜɪs ᴏᴡɴ ᴍɪɴᴅ. I ʜᴀᴅ ᴛᴏ ʜᴇʟᴘ ʜɪᴍ, ᴛᴏ ᴇɴsᴜʀᴇ ʜɪs ᴠɪᴄᴛᴏʀʏ. Sᴏ I ᴡʜɪsᴘᴇʀᴇᴅ ɪɴᴛᴏ ʜɪs ᴇᴀʀ, ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴀ sᴏғᴛ ᴄᴀʀᴇss: "LEGAL".
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

YA SPAM IT

twitchquotes: ヽ༼◥▶ل͜◀◤༽ノ THIS IS OUR CHAT MODS ヽ༼◥▶ل͜◀◤༽ノ (̿▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)̄ YA SPAM IT (̿▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)̄
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp wash your hands after toilet

twitchquotes: Hey @nl_Kripp , disabled former Streamer here. You're reacting pretty aggressive to your chat's worries regarding your hand washing after toilet. It seems you have something to hide. Let me tell you something: I was there too. I went to the toilet and didn't wash my hands. Nobody saw it, nobody would know it. But chat asked. And I lied. Then I got sick. My hands got infected from bacteria and had to be amputated. Now I can't play games any more for a living. Don't make the same mistake, Kripp.
twitch chat
December 2018
Kripp

New brofisting trend

twitchquotes: ヽ( ͡°╭͜ʖ╮͡° )ノ Kripp, it's me Papparrian. Your mother and I are very disappointed in this new 'brofisting' trend you've picked up on. We can only suspect it's due to you being around the succubus for too long. Please come home we miss you. No copypasterino cappuccino pizzarino pepperoni papa johns.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Hi Kripp, this is Hungrybox's mom

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, this is Hungrybox's mom. I noticed you are in need of a "comeback" you keep screaming about how "unlucky: and how "unfair" your little game is. Maybe Your moves are a little off because you are hungry. I think you should take a hard look at yourself in the mirror and think how it would feel if you ate some CAMPBELL'S CHUNKY SOUP. Its made with your favorite ingredient: Salt.
twitch chat
May 2020
Kripp

Gitraktmaet motherships descend upon the Earth

twitchquotes: High in orbit, the Gitraktmaet motherships descend upon the Earth. They prepare to enslave the world and mine it for all its salt, but the scanners detect an abnormally high concentration inside a tiny shack in Greece. The invasion won't be necessary. "Lock onto him with the RNG disruptor," says the captain, greedily. "Soon we shall have all the salt we need."
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Classic

salty

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