[Copypasta] I whispered into his ear, my word a soft caress: "LEGAL"

twitchquotes: Hᴇ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴏᴏʟs ʜᴇ ɴᴇᴇᴅᴇᴅ, ʏᴇᴛ ʜᴇ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ɴᴏᴛ sᴇᴇ ɪᴛ. I ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ʜɪᴍ ᴛᴏ sᴜᴄᴄᴇᴇᴅ sᴏ ʙᴀᴅʟʏ, ʜᴇ ᴡᴀs ɴᴇᴀʀʟʏ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ. Bᴜᴛ ʜᴇ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅɴ'ᴛ ғɪɴɪsʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴊᴏʙ ʙʏ ʜɪᴍsᴇʟғ. Bᴀᴍʙᴏᴏᴢʟᴇᴅ ʙʏ ʜɪs ᴏᴡɴ ᴍɪɴᴅ. I ʜᴀᴅ ᴛᴏ ʜᴇʟᴘ ʜɪᴍ, ᴛᴏ ᴇɴsᴜʀᴇ ʜɪs ᴠɪᴄᴛᴏʀʏ. Sᴏ I ᴡʜɪsᴘᴇʀᴇᴅ ɪɴᴛᴏ ʜɪs ᴇᴀʀ, ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴀ sᴏғᴛ ᴄᴀʀᴇss: "LEGAL".
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

I sexually idenfity as the Boogeymonster

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as The Boogeymonster. Ever since I pre-ordered 50 packs the only card I dreamed of pulling was The Boogeymonster to put it in my deck, play it on turn 8, and watch it grow. Watch it get out of control as it feasts on every puny creature my horrified opponent dares to lay on the board. I can already hear The Boogeymonster's attack sound as it swings in for a 30 damage lethal. If you can't accept this you're a boogeyphobe and you need to check your legendary privilege.
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

To protect the chat from devastation... Team Rocket and Twitch Chat

twitchquotes: ᴛᴏ ᴘʀᴏᴛᴇᴄᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄʜᴀᴛ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴅᴇᴠᴀsᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴ. ᴛᴏ ᴜɴɪᴛᴇ ᴀʟʟ sᴘᴀᴍᴍᴇʀs ᴡɪᴛʜɪɴ ᴏᴜʀ ɴᴀᴛɪᴏɴ. ᴛᴏ ᴅᴇɴᴏᴜɴᴄᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇᴠɪʟ ᴏғ Tʀᴜᴍᴘ ᴀɴᴅ ᴍᴏᴅs. ᴛᴏ ᴇxᴛᴇɴᴅ ᴏᴜʀ sᴘᴀᴍ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛᴀʀs ᴀʙᴏᴠᴇ. ᴄᴏᴘʏ! ᴘᴀsᴛᴇ! ᴄʜᴀᴛ sᴘᴀᴍ ʙʟᴀsᴛ ᴏғғ ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴘᴇᴇᴅ ᴏғ ʟɪɢʜᴛ! sᴜʀʀᴇɴᴅᴇʀ ᴍᴏᴅs ᴏʀ ᴘʀᴇᴘᴀʀᴇ ᴛᴏ ғɪɢʜᴛ! Kʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜᴀᴛs ʀɪɢʜᴛ!
twitch chat
June 2014
Kripp

Kripp's bike accident

twitchquotes: Toronto authorities reported that Octavian "kripp" Morosan passed away last night in the Toronto east general Hospital after a bike accident near his home
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Anything to get inside Kripp

twitchquotes: I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Kripp. That perfect, scrawny body. That shining forehead. The receding hairline of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I’ll never mate with him, pass my genes through him, and have nothing happen because he's a man. I’d do fucking ANYTHING for the chance to get inside Kripp. A N Y T H I N G.
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Kripp, this is Aquaman, King of the Seas

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Aquaman, King of the Seas, and I need your help. The salinity of our oceans has reached an all-time low, and only you, with your incredible salt output, can restore them to their proper levels. The fate of countless species of fish and other marine life rests in your scrawny vegan hands. Lend me your aid and I will reveal the ancient Atlantean cure for male-pattern baldness! Aquaman out!
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing