[Copypasta] which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

So as joke, I fucked my friend in a Joseph Stalin cosplay

So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing Joseph Stalin's mustache and clothes. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as the Soviet flag and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made made feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my clothes. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "Yes,comrade." He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "What's the matter,comrade?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "Not a step back!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came. His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'ms till Joseph Stalin."
September 2021

NSFW

3-eyed face

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–‘β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€(◐)β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“ β–‘β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–‘β–’β–’β–“(◐)β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–“β–“(◐)β–ˆβ–“ β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆ β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–€β–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–Œβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€
November 2014

REKT Not REKT

☐ Not REKT β˜‘ REKT β˜‘ REKTangle β˜‘ SHREKT β˜‘ REKT-it Ralph β˜‘ Total REKTall β˜‘ The Lord of the REKT β˜‘ The Usual SusREKTs β˜‘ North by NorthREKT β˜‘ REKT to the Future β˜‘ Once Upon a Time in the REKT β˜‘ The Good, the Bad, and the REKT β˜‘ LawREKT of Arabia β˜‘ Tyrannosaurus REKT β˜‘ eREKTile dysfunction
May 2014

Classic

Shrek

It seems you tathered Frump

twitchquotes: Finally, the Kripp thinks, he will be a Papparrian. "I will raise it perfectly, there'll be nothing he can't do it. What a gift!" But doctor says he has bad news. Kripp is scared. He follows. Rania is holding something covered in blankets and crying. Kripp removes the blanket and looks. Trump smirks, "It seems you tathered Frump."
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Jam a man of fortune xQc

π’₯𝒢𝓂 𝒢 𝑀𝒢𝓃 π‘œπ’» πΉπ‘œπ“‡π“‰π“Šπ“ƒπ‘’, 𝒢𝓃𝒹 π’₯ π“‚π“Šπ“ˆπ“‰ π“ˆπ‘’π‘’π“€ π“‚π“Ž πΉπ‘œπ“‡π“‰π“Šπ“ƒπ‘’ οΌπ»π‘’π“ƒπ“‡π“Ž Γ†π“‹π‘’π“‡π’Ύπ‘’π“ˆ, 𝟣𝟫𝟫𝟦
May 2021
xQcOW
Text-to-Speech Playing