[Copypasta] which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022
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Shroud

⠄⠄⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⢰⡾⠛⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⣀⣤⣤⣴⣦⣠⣄⣀⠄⠄⠄ ⠋⠁⣠⣄⣴⣶⠶⠶⠶⣦⡜⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠃⠁⡀⠄ ⣷⣾⣿⠟⠁⡀⠄⠄⢀⠄⠁⠈⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠰⠿⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠊⠄ ⣿⣿⠃⣀⣘⣓⣤⣤⠈⠁⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⡿⡤⠄⣈⣠⣄⣉⣉⡉⢉⣂⣀⣠⣤⠑ ⣿⣽⣾⣿⣿⣟⣩⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡈⢷⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢸⣬⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠈⠛⠁⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣭⣴⣾⣾⣋⣀⣠⠤⠐⢺⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣼⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣀⡀⠄⠉⢿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⡈⢉⣼⣿⣿⡿⠿⠽⠻⠧⠄⠛⢛⠊⠉⠓⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⠇⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡡⣷⣾⠟⠉⣠⣦⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡷⡇⠄⠄⢀⡠⢀⣿⠓⣼⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⣿⣥⠄⠈⠙⠋⠄⣀⣉⣉⡉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⢴⣿⣷⣿⣿⢂⠿⡟ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⡦⠤⣤⣭⣤⠄⠂⢀⢠⡤⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⡸⠂⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣶⢛⠟⠿⡿⡉⣁⡂⠸⢿⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄
December 2018
shroud

I saw Flying Lotus at a grocery store

twitchquotes: I saw Flying Lotus at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
twitch chat
November 2019

NA, aka 'No Achievements'

twitchquotes: NA, aka 'No Achievements' is the weakest region in the professional League of Legends scene. They are specifically known for their clown fiestas and never winning anything worthwhile in the history of League of Legends.
twitch chat
November 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Among Us teaches us to punish minorities

Among Us (coloquially termed "amogus") teaches us to punish the minority and hate those who are different and unique as "impostors." Instead, I like the breath of fresh air this problem provides as a new perspective on deduction that is not "red is sus, red vented, etc." that has been dominating the jokes of my peers and the view of my feed. Yet, by trying to force this problem to conform to "amogus," you yourself are trying to crush originality and uniqueness. Among Us is a game ultimately convincing us to conform to menial labor as "tasks" and accept the deal of being just like the rest of the crewmates.
October 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Fortnite default dance in text form

twitchquotes: pulls both arms outwards in front of my chest and pumps them behind my back, repeats this motion in a smaller range of motion down to my hips two times once more all while sliding my legs in a faux walking motion, claps my hands together in front of me while both my knees knock together, pumps my arms downward, pronating my wrists and abducting my fingers outward while crossing my legs back and forth, repeats this motion again two times while keeping my shoulders low and hunching over, does finger gun with right hand with left hand bent on my hip while looking directly forward and putting my left leg forward then crossing my arms and leaning back a little while bending my knees at an angle
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

Text-to-Speech Playing