[Copypasta] which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
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The prodigal son has returned

twitchquotes: Papparin opens the door to see a hobo squating outside his house. He hugs the lankey figure and tears drip onto a Diablo 2 shirt that has seen better times. "Tonight we feast," Papparin says as he begins to prepare a meal of falafel. Kripp flops down on his bed, surrounded by empty OJ cartons from a year ago. The prodigal son has returned.
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp

sumSmash

⣽⣤⣄⠟⡟⣄⣀⣼⣟⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢻⣿⡟⠘⠓⠙⠛⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠻⣿⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⠟⣠⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⡙⢿⣿⢃⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⠛⠯⠛⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣋⣛⣑⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠘⣦⣀⠈⢨⠄⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢩⠄⢈⠄⠤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡘⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣴⣧⢧⡤⣤⣀⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠈⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡄⠄⠄ ⣴⣿⡿⠛⠈⣧⠘⠉⠳⡄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⠂⠸⢷⡄⠈⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⢈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢃⠉⢀⠛⠄⡏⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣦⣴⠎⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⢿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021
Summt1g

Yo Mama guy

⠀⣴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡧⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣁⠀⠀⠀ ⠈⠣⢴⡖⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣤⣤⠶⣏⣠⡤⠀⣀⠀⣀⠀⠀⣠⡄⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠉⠻⡦⠀ ⠀⣰⡏⢀⡀⠀⢠⡄⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠇⠀⠀⠉⠉⠛⠾⠿⡤⠟⠛⠛⠛⠳⠶⠺⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣤⠤⠴⠃⠀ ⠀⢾⣤⣿⢀⡀⢸⡀⣠⣿⡇⠀⡀⠀⢠⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢞⣋⢉⡛⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⣯⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠻⣾⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠁⠉⡿⠀⠈⠉⣿⠘⠧⠼⠳⠶⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠟⠉⠁⠀⠁⠑⢷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⢤⣄⠚⢻⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠠⣇⣴⠄⠀⢻⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠄⠠⡾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢷⠀⢢⡆⠀⠰⠶⡶⠀⠀⠀⣾⠋⠀⡀⢻⣧⠛⠛⣦⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢿⣰⣇⢸⣇⡭⣑⡄⠀⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡈⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⠁⢸⠇⠀⣼⣿⠀⢻⡂⠀⢸⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠈⢹⠋⠀⠈⠻⡄⠰⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡴⠒⠉⣉⣉⣉⣉⣹⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠹⣸⠀⢠⣿⣿⡇⢸⡇⠀⠿⣄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢏⣡⠔⠋⠉⠉⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⡆⢸⣿⣿⡇⣸⠇⠀⠀⢸⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⣶⠂⠉⣙⣻⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠷⠶⠶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀⠛⢹⡇⣿⠀⢠⣤⠞⠁ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⣤⡞⠁⠀⠹⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⠶⢮⣸⠏⠀⢀⡹⠂⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣅⠀⠀⠀⢹⣆⠀⠀⢠⣤⡀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⠶⠶⠾⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⣤⠀⠀⠸⣇⣀⣼⢡⣤⣤⠵⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠷⣄⠀⠀⢿⡆⠀⢠⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡄⢸⡇⠀⠀⠈⣿⣶⣼⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣆⠈⢷⠀⣾⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡾⠁⣸⡿⠘⣷⣄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⣠ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣽⡆⠈⠛⢁⣀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣤⡴⠖⠛⠉⠀⣴⠟⠁⠀⣷⠙⠛⠿⢿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠋⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣥⣿⣶⠛⠋⠉⠉⢉⣩⡭⠿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠀⠀⠀⠀⣘⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠏⠑⡶⠖⢻⠏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠈⢧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠇⠀⠈⢷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⡗⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⠃⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⢨⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⠴⠞⠋⢹⡄⠀⠀⠀⢇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡤⠖⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠳⣄⠀⠀⢈⣁⣀⣤⡤⢴⣶⠿⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣾⣯⣥⣤⠤⢤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡾⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠙⠳⢤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
September 2021

Call of Duty is the most realistic video game with the most advanced engine

Meanwhile in Call of Duty, true gamers laugh about Battlefield's primitive physics engine. Arma was an attempt by a failing Czech developer to make Call of Duty 'more realistic'. However due to the fact that Call of Duty was already as realistic as a video game can possibly be, they panicked. They made a shameless rip-off and slapped 'military simulator' on the front. True gamers are smart enough to know this, hence why Arma averages 67 on Metacritic, whereas Call of Duty averages 98-100. Call of Duty players laugh down at players of every other game, knowing they are Call of Duty rip-offs. Call of Duty is the most realistic video game with the most advanced engine. The world's leading video game scientists have confirmed this, so it isn't as much 'thinking' as it is 'knowing'. And Call of Duty can't possibly RIP those games off. Call of Duty was the first video game, so there wasn't anything for it to rip off.
August 2021

Call of Duty

Don't put grills in your bedroom

twitchquotes: don't put grills in your bedroom, you can die from carbon monoxide poisoning when they are still hot FailFish
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing