[Copypasta] which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022
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Foreign volunteers in Ukraine (variation of original chicken nuggets copypasta)

Holy shit. My commanding officer came into my barracks to bring me an MRE and I literally screamed at her and hit the plate of rations out of her hand. She started yelling and swearing at me in Ukrainian which I didn't understand and I slammed the door on her. I'm so distressed right now I don't know what to do. I didn't mean to do that to my superior officer but I'm literally in shock from the cruise missile strike. I feel like I'm going to explode. Why the fucking fuck is Zelenskyy losing? This can't be happening. I'm having a fucking breakdown. I don't want to believe the world is so corrupt that nato won't impose a no fly zone. I want a future to believe in. I want Zelenskyy to be president of a united Ukraine and fix this broken country. I cannot fucking deal with this right now. It wasn't supposed to be like this, I thought we had anti air coverage in western Ukraine???? This is so fucked.
March 2022

Russian Ukrainian War

Fluttershy

โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“ โ–“ โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“ โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“ โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“ โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ–’โ–’ โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–“ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–‘โ–’โ–โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“ โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“ โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“
November 2014

Seven flamestrikes is not a FREE TO PLAY deck

twitchquotes: Kripp, how can you even PRETEND that you are playing with a FREE TO PLAY deck when yours has seven flamestrikes? I thought this stream was newbie friendly, well apparently I was mistaken. For the sake of ***. Unsubbed, unfollowed and unremembered. Bye, Kripp.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Wagner Opera Topdeckhoffen

twitchquotes: Gแดœแด›แด‡ษด Tแด€ษข, Hแด‡ส€ส€ Kส€ษชแด˜แด˜! Mแด‡ษชษด Nแด€แดแด‡ ษชsแด› Pแด‡แด›แด‡ส€ แด แดษด Pแด€sแด›แด‡ษดสœแดา“า“แด‡ษด. Hแด‡ส€แด‡ ษชษด Dแด‡แดœแด›sแด„สœสŸแด€ษดแด… แดกแด‡ แด€ส€แด‡ แดแด€แด‹ษชษดษข ษดแด‡แดก Wแด€ษขษดแด‡ส€ แดแด˜แด‡ส€แด€ Tแดแด˜แด…แด‡แด„แด‹สœแดา“า“แด‡ษด. Rแด€ษดษชแด€ ษชs Vแด€สŸแด‹สส€ษชษดแด, แด€ษดแด… แด‹ษชสŸสŸs สแดแดœ ษชษด ส€แด‡แด แด‡ษดษขแด‡ า“แดส€ แด…แด€s Pแดส€ษดสœแดœส™. Tส€แดœแดแด˜ แด˜แดแดœส€s Oส€แด€ษดษขแด‡ษดsแด€า“แด› แดษด สแดแดœส€ ษขส€แด€แด แด‡, แด€ษดแด… สแดแดœ แด€แด˜แด˜แด‡แด€ส€ ษชษด sแด‹ส แด€s แด„แด€sแดœแด€สŸ ษขสœแดsแด›แด‡ส€ษชษดแด. PสŸแดข ษดแด แด„แดแด˜แด˜แด‡ษด แด˜แด€sแด›แด‡ษด แด…แดแดษขแด‡ษด แด…แด€แด€ษขแด‡ษด.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

POLICE VOLIBEAR

twitchquotes: HotPokket HELLO RIOT? โ˜Ž๏ธ HotPokket MAE HERE โ˜Ž๏ธ POLICE VOLIBEAR SELECTED โ˜Ž๏ธ HotPokket IM TRIGGERED โ˜Ž๏ธ HotPokket
twitch chat
July 2020

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing