[Copypasta] which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022
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More Copypastas

Tyler1 breaks the rules

twitchquotes: Tyler1 isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such an ability and movement with Draven? Tyler puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. Faker breaks records. Bjergsen breaks records. Tyler fking 1 breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer to be ALPHA. BigBrother
twitch chat
December 2016

League of Legends

When Kripp is eat I pretend he is eat me

twitchquotes: Wสœแด‡ษด Kส€ษชแด˜แด˜ ษชs แด‡แด€แด› ษช แด˜ส€แด‡แด›แด‡ษดแด… สœแด‡ ษชs แด‡แด€แด› แดแด‡. ษช ษขแด แด…แดแดกษด แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ แดกแด‡แด› แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ แด›สœส€แดแด€แด› แด€ษดแด… แด€แด ษชษด แดกแด€ส€แด แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ sแด›แดแดแด€แด„สœ. แด›สœแด‡ษด ษช ษขแด แด…แด‡แด‡แด˜แด‡ส€ ษชษดแด›แด แด›สœแด‡ แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜. ษช แด€แด แดแด€แด…แด‡ ษชษดแด›แด แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ ษขแดสŸแด…. แด›สœแด‡ แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ sษชแด›s แดษด แด›แดษชสŸแด‡แด› แด€ษดแด… า“ส€แด‡แด‡s แดแด‡. ษช แด€แด sแด€แด… ษช แด€แด ษดแด สŸแดษดษขแด‡ส€ แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ า“แดแดแด…. แด›สœแด‡ษด แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ แด‡แด€แด›s แดแด‡ แด€ษขแด€ษชษด.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Keepo

โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘ โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
November 2014

Jeff from History class last semester

twitchquotes: Hey, kripp! What's up, man? It's Jeff from History class from last semester. I didn't know you were some kind of famous celebrity hahahaha. Hit me up, man. Btw, did you ever hook up with Brian? He was a T H I C C boy. xD You are such a dog. It's cool to see you again. Hit me up sometime!
twitch chat
May 2017
Kripp

Travis Scott Burger

I have a theory about the Travis Scott burger. I think itโ€™s a sham. Itโ€™s all a multi million dollar misinformation campaign. McDonalds has been hurting for a new supply of beef due to the Covid 19 pandemic. With all of the meat processing plant closures, they had to look elsewhere to get their precious beef for the ever so hungry American. They needed a new supplier. This has to be nobody other than Travis Scott. You see, since marrying Kylie Jenner, he had access to all of her cosmetic companyโ€™s animal testing plants. It was easy for Travis to get ahold of meat... it was too easy. Travis knew McDonalds was desperate for new meat, so he struck while the iron was hot. Through a swift negotiation, he had the multi billion dollars corporation by the balls, the sweet sweet balls. Travis agreed to supply them with the meat, only he lead them to believe it was coming from cows when in reality he was harvesting the animals from the animal cosmetic testing lab. In exchange, he got his name on the McDonalds menu. All for what? Now you may be wondering how I came across this info. And you may be wondering who sent you this information. It was Cactus Jack. Cactus Jack sent this info.
October 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing