[Copypasta] An exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke

Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin. Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time. I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
April 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Roe v. Wade Emoji Pasta

HEY 👋😩 there comrade 💦💪cummy! the 👹 supreme 🍆 cock🏛 has 🗳voted to strike 👩‍⚖️⌛️down the 🌈 sexy 🤧🤰🏻roe v. wade decision 😏according 🤤🦶🏻to a opinion 🖊written✍️💸 by daddy 💅🏻🙈 sammy 👶🏻🙅🏻‍♂️ aLITo. 🐷💨 the opinion is a 💦🍌 FULL THROATED 📲❤️‍🔥GIRTHY 🍆 contraDICKtion 🚫🍑 of the 1973 👿👎decision that 💁🏻‍♀️👌 guaranteed federal 😤 cocks-titutuinal 😳 protection 👅💄of abortion rights!!! ❤️‍🔥🫡everyone who 🏳️‍🌈💦 woke remember 🙋✊🏻🤔 to fund 💸🥵 planned parenthood and 🌪👼 donate to 🧑🏼‍🍼🤑abortion funds! get yo 📸uturuses 💋👠turnt you 💃whore! 🌭every whore knows 🧠🍼that everyone 🔜should have 👩‍⚕️🏥access to safe 🙏 🌎abortions ❤️😘 if they choose 💅🏻👀 to have one. 👑👹send to ten 😬🙏of your closest 🚱🅾️WHORES to secure abortion 📫🤝rights in ameriCUM 🤤🇺🇸if you get five ✋ back abortion 😘💋rights will be codified 👩‍⚖️🤤in law 📸👠
May 2022

Emoji Pasta

Politics

Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes

twitchquotes: Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes. His face comes closer as he plants his wet lips onto mine. We are locked together in a beautiful display of love. Then I wake up. I look at Kripp's stream. He is playing Tavern Brawl. Now I remember why I fell asl... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
November 2016
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

Mom, twitch chat is not a documentary on Nazis!

twitchquotes: My mom just walked into my room and asked why I was watching a documentary on Hitlers top officers. I told her "No mom it's just twitch chat mods" She called me a Jew hater and burned a Swastika into my forehead.
twitch chat
August 2014
Trump

Kripp ignores chat draft

twitchquotes: As a young boy, Kripp lived with his family in a chateau in Romania. Kripp had a younger sister who was born frail and prone to illness. The family always took special care to make sure she was never too cold or hot. One day Kripp's parents were late and told Kripp to put his sister to bed. Kripp accidentally left the window of the chateau open, his sister contracted pneumonia and died. At the funeral, his father sobbed and said "My son, why did you ignore the chat draft?"
twitch chat
November 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Greetings Michael, this is your Mother

twitchquotes: Greeting Michael, this is your Mother. I heard earlier that you "maybe" 420 blaze it. I am very concerned. I dont like that Pobelter boy and I dont think you should hang out with him anymore. I hope the rest of you concerned mothers in twitch chat will copy paste this so my son will see...
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing