[Copypasta] An exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke

Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin. Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time. I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
April 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Twitter doesn't like copypasta

We’ve seen an increase in ‘copypasta,’ an attempt by many accounts to copy, paste, and Tweet the same phrase. 🍝🔁 When we see this behavior, we may limit the visibility of the Tweets. https://help.twitter.com/en/safety-and-security/tweet-visibility
May 2022

The Tomato Town Incident

At around 10:00 AM on the morning of December 18th, 2018, in what was widely believed to be an act of government-sponsored ethnic cleansing, two armed militia men were seen parachuting from a military plane into the vicinity of Tomato Town. Upon landing the two quickly unholstered assault rifles and entered the local pizzeria where a massacre of unarmed civilians unfolded as they kept shouting, "Get Down! Get Down!". Improvised explosives were then detonated at the site of the crime to obscure the victim's identities. The local police chief spotted the assailants as they were exiting the diner and shot one in the back before he was quickly revived by his accomplice as they boarded a "technical" pickup truck and headed southbound. The two militiamen were outnumbered but gave chase before being cornered in the streets of the nearby district of Pleasant Park where a shootout occurred with the police. The two assailants were seen chugging jugs of alcohol before getting back into the pickup truck and heading towards Moist Mire where the police lost them, deliberately detouring around Loot Lake as a local source had tipped them off to the stationing of UN peacekeeping forces in the area. 10 bodies were later discovered in the rubble of the Pizzeria's board room. Not long after the assailants left the area, a purple cloud believed to be an experimental chemical agent developed by the government swept the area, resulting in death by suffocation, making the town uninhabitable and turning the survivors of the massacre into refugees. Military contractors hired by the government bulldozed what was left of Tomato Town including the ruins of the Pizzeria as well as the memorial site for the victims and redeveloped it into a religious site/tourist attraction for the dominant religion of the country known as "Tomato Temple". To this day the government denies the massacre and subsequent chemical weapons attack despite multiple Human Rights agencies releasing interviews with the survivors and even one of the assailants coming forward with a testimony of guilt uploaded to social media after a UN Geneva Convention Probe confirmed the use of banned chemical agents.
March 2021

Fortnite

No YEP COCK today

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⠫⠓⠚⠉⠙⠓⠫⢻⠿⣟⠿⠭⠩⠛⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⠕⠁⣠⠴⠒⠋⠉⢉⣉⣛⣛⣲⣤⣀⠔⠒⠛⢒⣋⣹⣛⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⣖⡫⠝⠒⠂⠀⠀⠐⠺⣷⡲⠭⠛⠓⠒⠚⠫⠬⡻ ⣿⣿⡿⢟⠝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠮⣉⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⡿⠿⡆⠀⠈⡇⠀⠀⢰⣿⠿⡆⠀⠈ ⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡑⢄⠀⠀⠻⠿⠶⠃⠀⢀⡧⢄⡀⠘⠻⠶⠁⠀⣀ ⢧⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣄⡈⠓⣯⣖⣲⠤⠤⠴⠶⠯⠽⠦⢾⣿⡭⣬⡤⣩⣾ ⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⠴⠒⠉⠉⣁⡠⠤⠤⠔⠒⠒⠶⠶⠦⠤⢤⣈⣉⠛⢼⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠁⠠⠴⠒⢋⣉⣠⠤⠴⠖⠒⠚⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠒⠲⠮⣭⡓⠯ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢎⠳⠤⠒⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢙⣳ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣱⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣱⣿⣿ ⣆⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿ ⠈⠙⠵⣒⠤⠤⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⣔⣮⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠒⠒⠮⠭⠭⢉⣉⣈⡉⠉⠭⠭⠝⠋⠘⠝⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣮⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ NO YEP COCK TODAY IM SAD
May 2020

Pepe

Addicted to copy pasta

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. You got me addicted to copy pasta you sick ***. I was 19 and on my way to my dream job when you first gave me a hit of this junk. Now I'm cappucino dongeringos in back-alleys just for another copy pasta. I'm chasing that first high and I'm scared I'll rip in pepperinos soon if I don't find help. Pls no crop a dingo pace the rhino my story.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Origin of Twitch chat Sub Mode

twitchquotes: The year is 1945. "Hafu," Trump speaks breathlessly into the night. "Get back to the time machine. We have what we need here." A foul smirk plays upon his lips as he pockets a top-secret Nazi folder marked "Sub Mode." Lightning flashes and thunder crashes far across the German mountains. "We will see who says Tuck Frump' now," he says.
twitch chat
November 2014
Trump

MODS

Text-to-Speech Playing