[Copypasta] I love the McChicken

For me, it's the McChicken. The best fast food sandwich. I even ask for extra McChicken sauce packets and the staff is so friendly and more than willing to oblige. One time I asked for McChicken sauce packets and they gave me three. I said, "Wow, three for free!" and the nice friendly McDonald's worker laughed and said, "I'm going to call you 3-for-free!". Now the staff greets me with "hey it's 3-for-free!" and ALWAYS give me three packets. It's such a fun and cool atmosphere at my local McDonald's restaurant, I go there at least 3 times a week for lunch and a large iced coffee with milk instead of cream, 1-2 times for breakfast on the weekend, and maybe once for dinner when I'm in a rush but want a great meal that is affordable, fast, and can match my daily nutritional needs. I even dip my fries in McChicken sauce, it's delicious! What a great restaurant.
April 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Hey Doublelift! It's me Greg from high school

twitchquotes: Hey Doublelift! It's me Greg from high school. How's it going man? Remember that one time you jacked off Mr. Stevens to get an A in gym? Haha classic Yiliang you always did the craziest things. Nice talking to you my man.
twitch chat
February 2017
Doublelift

Tanner from High School

Middle finger

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–‘ ░░░▄▀▀▀▀▄▒▒▒▒▒▀▀▀▄▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▐░░ ░░▐▒▄▀▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▄▄▄▄▄▒▒▒▒▒▀▄▄▐░░ β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–€β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–„β–„β–’β–β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–’β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–Œβ–€β–β–’β–Œβ–‘β–‘ ░░░░▐▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▐▒▒▀▒▐░░░ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–„β–’β–€β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘ ░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▄▄▄▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▐░░░░ β–‘β–‘β–„β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ ▀▒▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▐░░▄▄░░░ ░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▐░░▐░░▐░░ ░░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄▄▄▄▄▀░▄▄▐░░▐▄▄ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β– ░░░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▐▐ ░░░░▐░░░░░░░░▐
June 2017

There was nothing I could do but donate

twitchquotes: β˜‘ β€œThese Hafu nudes are CRAZY!” β˜‘ β€œMy dick can't stay limp against nudes like that” β˜‘ "She NEEDED precisely those two nips to win" β˜‘ β€œShe took the only nudes that could make me beat off” β˜‘ "She had the perfect muff" β˜‘ β€œThere was nothing I could do but donate” β˜‘ β€œShe cried profusely"
twitch chat
October 2014

Where i grew up copy pasta was taken seriously

twitchquotes: Dear Twitch Chat users. Do u think its funny to copy pasta everything you see? Copy that, pasta that. Where i grew up copy pasta was taken seriously, and when i come here my mind explodes. Please, respect copy pasta. For me, it's about religion.
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

Response to "go fuck yourself"

What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
April 2020

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing