I enjoy ketchup more than the average person. Made with tomatoes and vinegar, this ubiquitous red sauce is my condiment of choice for a wide variety of dining situations. Sweet and tangy, it's perfect for eating with french fries and burgers, of course, but you might not realize how good it is incorporated into other dishes. Its unique sweet and savory nature makes it a bit of a dynamo that way. No wonder this addictive table staple of households and restaurants is so beloved.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Henry Dongerman and his pet donger Mr Mittens
twitchquotes:
Hey my name is Henry Dongerman I lost my pet donger. Here's a picture of him [ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ] if you can help find him I would be eternally grateful he means the world to me. Mr. Mittens is his name if it helps share this around and pray to lord donger to help find him. His favorite song is ᕙ༼ຈلຈ༽ᕗ HARDER BETTER FASTER DONGER ᕙ༼ຈلຈ༽ᕗ so try playing that he may come
twitch chat
Kripp
An exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke
Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin.
Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time.
I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
Cute squid
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣉⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⡟⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡌⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡟⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⢿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡇⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢸⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣇⢹⣿⡿⠋⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠿⣿⣿⡇⣸⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⡈⢿⣇⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣾⡿⢁⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⠟⢿⣷⡘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣴⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⣾⡿⠻⣿⣿
⡏⡄⠸⠟⠃⠈⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠻⣿⡿⠁⠘⠿⠇⢀⢹⣿
⡅⣿⣄⠀⣰⣾⣿⣷⡄⠘⠟⣡⣶⣿⣿⣦⠈⠁⠰⠿⠃⣠⣿⢸⣿
⣷⡹⢿⡀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⣴⣿⣿⡟⢁⡀⠀⢰⣤⣶⣾⣿⢃⣾⣿
⣿⣿⣦⣀⠸⣿⣿⡟⠃⠸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠘⣛⠂⠾⠿⢟⣋⣵⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡘⠿⣿⠰⣶⣍⣛⣛⣃⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
Ten reasons why you can't move to Scotland
Tin resins why ye canae move tae Sco'land.
Win - We dinnae want ye here
Tae - Yer nae hard enough
Threh - Ye wouldnae like the wither (and ye wouldne ken hoo tae describ it - dreich, drookit, haar, etc)
Fir - Yer a dafty who couldne git intae oor big skels and dinnae ken aboot the Sco'ish Enlightinment
Fiv - Yer a big girruls blouse and cannae keep up wi oor drinkin
Sex - Yed get snapped in hoff if ye played fitbaw wi us
sivvun - Ye coodnae handle the patter
It - Wae dinnae wint ye drivin up the hoos prices
Nin - Yer pribly a jobbyjabber who likes it it in the backsie
Tin - Oor wimmun boke at the sight of ye
If somehoo ye dae mit the abuv requirmints then ye can enter but ye must promis to vote fi SNP, the ONLY party that trilly represents Sco'land.
Fuck off hame any English cunts.
Trolling My Office With Among Us (Part 7)
After we threw Liam out the window, I decided to call another emergency meeting. “Chad sus!1!1!!1 He’s the SUSSY VERY IMPOSTER!” I said. They all asked why Chad was sus. I said it was because his name is Chad. They all agreed so we ejected him. I was naruto running around the office when Adam stopped me and said “Why are you running?” OH MY FUCK DID HE JUST SAY THE FUNNY UGANDAN MEME? SPIT ON HIM BROTHERS. I spit on Adam and I pulled down my pants and pissed on him. He ran away screaming and everybody looked at me. I pulled my pants up.“ Adam sus. He’s screaming.” Everyone nodded and we ejected Adam. My son came out of the elevator even though it was take your kid to work day and he was supposed to be on the bottom floor, not up here on the 3rd floor! So I said “Son, what the fuck nugget wholesome keanu reeves are you doing here?” He closed the elevator door and I think he went to the first floor. I tried pissing on the elevator door in hopes that it would malfunction it but I don’t think it worked. That stupid little bastard. So I got in the elevator when it came back up and went to the first floor. I looked around but couldn’t find him. I pulled one of the kids up by her shirt and said “WHERE THE FUCK IS MY CHILD?” She was screaming and I threw her away. I stomped down the hallways trying to look for him but I couldn’t find him. “This is not a fortnite minecraft roblox 100 wholesome keanu reeves chungus Amogus moment. That’s pretty sus.” All the coworkers were looking at me in terror.
I went out back and searched in the dumpster to see if I could yet again try to find a weapon to kill all the people there. I already got rid of Chad, Adam and Liam so everyone else could easily be disposed of.