[Copypasta] I love ketchup so much

I enjoy ketchup more than the average person. Made with tomatoes and vinegar, this ubiquitous red sauce is my condiment of choice for a wide variety of dining situations. Sweet and tangy, it's perfect for eating with french fries and burgers, of course, but you might not realize how good it is incorporated into other dishes. Its unique sweet and savory nature makes it a bit of a dynamo that way. No wonder this addictive table staple of households and restaurants is so beloved.
April 2022
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More Copypastas

Jerma crushed by a CRT television

On September 20th, 2018, authorities arrived on the scene Thursday to find Jerma (Jeremy โ€œNine-hundred eighty-fiveโ€ Elbertson, 32) dead on the scene. Medical experts say he died from natural causes after being pinned under a CRT television weighing only 35 pounds.
January 2022
Jerma985

Not enough brofisting

twitchquotes: Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Bro-Fist-All-My-Subs, this'll be the last pasta I ever send your ***. It's been six months and still no word - I don't deserve it? I know you got my last two pastas; I wrote the Kappas on 'em perfect. I'm in the chat right now, spamming penises in r9k. Hey Kripp, I drank a fifth of OJ, you dare me to riot?
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp fills me completely with value

twitchquotes: I stayed up all night, dreaming of this moment. My pulse is racing. Discarded salt packets and OJ cartons are strewn across the filthy bedroom floor. "Oh look it's another sub," says the Kripp. I am now fully erect. "Welcome to the five dollar club, bro" I barely hear as a single tear runs down my cheek while Kripp's fist fills me completely with value.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

MLK day emojipasta

heyyy ๐Ÿ‘‹ Marthin Luther QUEENS ๐Ÿ‘ฏโ€โ™€๏ธ i have a dream ๐Ÿ˜ด ๐Ÿ›Œ that you will be dicked ๐Ÿ† down โฌ‡๏ธ tonight like DADDY ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿฟโ€๐Ÿฆณ Martin Luther King Jr. would have wanted ๐Ÿ˜ŒโœŠ๐Ÿฟ so MARCH ๐Ÿšถโ€โ™€๏ธ on down โฌ‡๏ธ to his washington monument ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ and have a SIT IN ๐ŸงŽโ€โ™€๏ธ on that DICK ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ† Make sure to ABOLISH his KKKOCK ๐Ÿ—ฝ like a TRUE PATRIOT ๐Ÿ—ฝ segregate those cheeks ๐Ÿ‘ tonight it doesnโ€™t matter ๐Ÿ™…โ€โ™€๏ธ if his fountain ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ’ฆ is BLACK or WHITE ๐Ÿค we are all CUMRADES ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ in the fight against discrimination ๐Ÿ˜ SOAK those PANTIFA ๐Ÿฉฒ our TWERK is not over โ€ผ๏ธ SEND this ๐Ÿ“ค to โœŒ๏ธ every WOKE HOE ๐Ÿคฏ you know ๐Ÿ†˜ Get 2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ BACK to END racism โœŠ and UNITE the races in SEXUAL ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿ‘Œ HARMONY โ˜ฎ๏ธ
January 2024

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

MLK Day

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